Today, I bought a $450 elliptical machine to get in shape of the new year. After 5 hours of putting it together, I realized that all the ceilings in every room of my apartment are too low for me to use it without hitting my head. I can't return it. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I bought a treadmill as part of my goal to get fit for summer. It doesn't look like it's going to get much use, seeing as how I sprained my ankle trying to get it in my doorway. FML
Today, I went to sit on a desk chair, which promptly rolled out from under me. This made me fall on my own foot, literally shattering two bones. I just bought a 9-month gym membership and can't use it because I wanted to sit down. FML
Today, I went to my gym and tried a new workout machine that had just been installed. I set the weight too high and ended up stuck halfway through a lift, making weird struggling noises. Most people around me stopped and stared as I awkwardly dropped the weights. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in months and couldn't figure out how to use any of the equipment. FML
Today, I paid $500 for a gym membership after moving into a brand new house, since 12 years of software development has taken its toll. When I told my instructor about my goal to lose 35lbs in two months, he simply said, "Yeah... That's not going to happen. Try another gym," and left promptly. FML
Today, I bought a flatpack, easy to assemble cot-bed for my baby. I spent 5 hours building it, but when it was done, I realised I couldn't reach into it because I'm 5ft and my arms can't reach and lift the baby. I'd have to throw him in. I'm suffering from back spasms as a result, and I now need to disassemble and return it. FML
Today, I finally got a Wii Fit to try and lose some weight. I came home and set it all up, only to be told that I weigh too much to actually use it. FML
Today, I went to the gym for the first time in quite a while. I was feeling pretty good about myself until I realized I'd been on the elliptical machine for twenty minutes without having actually turned it on. I was just moving the pedals and wondering why I wasn’t getting tired. FML
Today, after the longest time, I went to the gym. I ran and ran and ran on the treadmill for an eternity, beating myself up for getting so overweight. Then I tripped and fell off, sweating and sobbing for being so useless. When I looked up, I saw I'd been on the machine for barely 2 minutes. FML
Today, I couldn't take home the free weights I'd planned on buying to start bodybuilding 'cos I couldn't lift the box, which was too heavy for me. FML
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Top comments
GoW_Chick 14
eBay to the rescue!
mwrc8man94 1
Wear a helmet.
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Comments (81)
loserman67 35
Sounds like a excuse to me - I'm sure there are things you can do on the machine to workout. If you're really dedicated, you'll find a way. Now don't sit at the kitchen table eating cookies while you figure something out - go run around the machine and figure it out
ramboman19 8
You deserve it for spending $450 on an elliptical. I recommend a gym membership.
THE_A_TEEN 27
Not everyone wants to go to the gym, some are self conscience(sp?) about themselves. I recommend working out under your preferable enviroment, and don't listen to what these other people say.
GoW_Chick 14
... and wouldn't a membership just cost more in the long run not only do you have to pay for it there's also the gas for the car to get there and you always have to wait for the equipment so you might not get the full work out you intended.
downtime 12
31, Do you also laugh at home owners from your rental accommodation?
RedPillSucks 31
Where did you buy the machine that you can't return it? Perhaps eBay or craigslist? And where are you living, in a cave? Most ceilings are 9 feet or more high.
chillyCholo 5
Lay it down
SirFmlsAlot 5
How tall are ur ceilings 7 feet?
skeezle 0
That's what I'm saying.
obviousboy 8
Go jogging. Much cheaper.
GoW_Chick 14
Until you get hit by a car... damn things come out of nowhere!
ThatLooksSticky 16
Time to move it to your porch/patio/backyard.
silentbutfunny 0
Apartment?
Calyx_fml 21
Buy a helmet.
simgar98 0
buy a new home with a higher ceilling
THE_A_TEEN 27
Ha, in this economy?
silentbutfunny 0
Duh, the problem is houses are cheap and nobody wants to buy em cause they would have to sell their own equally low-priced house.
GreenDancingBear 7
probably should have checked the dimensions first.. unless your just super tall, ydi