Cats, Cute and Animals: Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided...

By Anonymous - 29/01/2013 17:41 - United States - Des Moines

Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 425

You deserved it 10 070

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Same thing different taste

By toothpastecat - 13/05/2011 15:41 - Canada

Today, I was brushing my teeth. As a bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spit a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 627

You deserved it 8 426

By Anonymous - 18/02/2013 19:11 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 083

You deserved it 40 017

By Anonymous - 28/10/2009 18:40 - United States

Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 234

You deserved it 89 745

By splitzville - 16/03/2010 20:12 - United States

Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 962

You deserved it 40 858

Smelly cat, smelly cat…

By Kas - 25/11/2020 11:02

Today, my cat decided the perfect place to throw up was on herself. Cleaning a smelly old cat with a showerhead is trouble enough, but when she tried to escape, it resulted in the bathroom being turned into one big puddle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 771

You deserved it 140

By murphy22 - 24/08/2012 09:33 - United States - Norman

Today, I was taking a relaxing bath. My cat decided to sit on the ledge, which is normal for her, but today she fell in. I never knew how painful it was to be scratched down there until today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 643

You deserved it 2 822

By Anon O'Mous - 02/01/2012 15:38 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower at the gym when hearing a loud popping noise. Surprised and startled, I jumped and slipped, hitting my head against the shower wall that left a small gash. The pop noise was just someone blowing bubbles from their gum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 585

You deserved it 5 696

By Noname - 12/03/2009 22:08 - United States

Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML

I agree, your life sucks 150 390

You deserved it 22 956

Rescue cat

By crazycatlady - 04/02/2017 20:00 - United States - Charlotte

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, and I had to save him. I now have a soggy cat and scratched arms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 418

You deserved it 836

By Catremorse - 01/08/2019 14:00 - United States - Centreville

Today, my cat was laying on my chest while I was in bed. I farted, which my closed legs seemed to amplify. My cat was so scared, she used me as a launching pad and cut my chest in three places with her claws. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 356

You deserved it 549

Pleonasm 35

Tuesday 29 January 2013 22:55

"Sticky situation" comments and pussy double-entendres in 3...2...1...

perdix 29

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:04

Take yer dirty animal down to PetsMart where the motto is: We're not ******* about cleaning cats.

Comments

ulissey_fml 22

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:11

Mmm. ha

ulissey_fml 22

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:29

hairy situation, no?

Pleonasm 35

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:44

Apparently not.

ulissey_fml 22

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:13

Mmm. if you want to master the art of bathing a cat, you'll need to start from scratch.

mimiminx 23

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:20

You don't need to learn how to bathe a cat! They're self cleaning and actually it's really bad for them as it washes all their natural oils out of their fur.

Catkam623 27

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:52

Your an idiot that was a pun on scratch apparently just because it was original people can't recognize it.

mimiminx 23

Wednesday 30 January 2013 0:27

Au contraire. I feel that, in fact, *you're* the idiot.

Shilokitten666 19

Wednesday 30 January 2013 2:48

Your both idiots, its good to bathe your animals otherwise what would be the point of making feline shampoo, unless you're a vet, that of which my cousin is and speciallizes in felines, the dont post stupid advice that is wrong... Op wash the cat but maybe wear gloves and thick clothing to not get scratched

_krystallynn_ 11

Wednesday 30 January 2013 4:15

cats cant effectively lick all of their face like they can their back or sides, and when its something like gum, it would rip their fur out and they would swallow it, causing hairballs. so i think the cats 'natural fur oils' can handle one bath.

ohcheriecherie 20

Wednesday 30 January 2013 4:58

65 has never had a cat I guess. They lick their paw and rub their face. It works for them. Cause my cat has the face of a beauty queen, thank you very much

molzipan 16

Wednesday 30 January 2013 7:20

Well 21 you're both right and wrong. Short haired cats don't necessarily need to be bathed regularly but if op has a long haired cat it should definitely be bathed and brushed regularly to prevent matting and the like. This is coming from someone who has been grooming for a long time. There is only so much an animal can do to keep themselves clean.

mimiminx 23

Wednesday 30 January 2013 12:03

#57 actually, my husband is a veterinary surgeon, so I'm pretty sure my advice is safe to follow. Sorry to burst your bubble.

kinky44 28

Wednesday 30 January 2013 16:21

Made you look

pedosmurf 7

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:19

Scars from last time? I didn't know scars can go away :)

Pleonasm 35

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:23

Whether they go away or not does not change the fact that she got scars from the last time she tried to bathe her. You're coming across as trying to correct by saying that she didn't need to say that detail because they never go away. However it's a necessary detail because she could have just as easily not gotten any scars, and the fact that she did, emphasisies how hard it will be to take out the gum given the cat's aversion to being bathed to the point of scratching with enough force to scar OP, regardless of the lifespan of a scar.

mimiminx 23

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:24

Basically what #22 is saying is that your comment didn't make sense. At all.

leadawg75 12

Wednesday 30 January 2013 1:19

They haven't thats why he said that

CallMeMcFeelii 13

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:24

Some people take this site a little to seriously. Kind of takes all the fun out of it.

ulissey_fml 22

Tuesday 29 January 2013 23:27

I don't want to burst your bubble every one, but gum is produced with a kind of rubber that is as resistant as tyres. the only thing that woks is cold, icy, freezing cold. I rub ice cubes when I want to clean chewing gum stuck on a jean. Wait. what's that cat doing in the icebox?