Today, I blew a huge gum bubble. My cat was on my lap and decided to shove her face in the bubble. There's gum all over her, and I still have scars from the last time I tried bathe her. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was brushing my teeth. As I bent down to spit my mouthful of toothpaste into the sink, my cat decided it would be a good time to stick his head right where I was spitting. I spat a huge glob of toothpaste on his head. He then shook it off all over me and the walls. FML
Today, I was about to make out with my boyfriend, so I quickly swallowed my gum. Moments later, I started choking on the gum, and ended up spitting it out into his face. FML
Today, I decided to treat myself to a relaxing bubble bath. Mid-soak, I heard a loud crash and realized my cat had knocked over a shelf, sending shampoo bottles and bath salts tumbling into the water. Now I'm stuck cleaning up a soapy mess instead of enjoying my spa time. FML
Today, I was playing with my cat and holding her upside down. She started frantically meowing, but I still continued on playing with her. Seconds later, she got explosive diarrhea everywhere, including my hair, face, shirt, and mouth. FML
Today, I noticed a cute girl in the checkout lane at the store. Feeling a little flirtatious, I decided to blow a bubble with my gum to get her attention. I accidentally shot the gum out of my mouth onto the guy next to me, spitting all over myself in the process. FML
Today, my cat decided the perfect place to throw up was on herself. Cleaning a smelly old cat with a showerhead is trouble enough, but when she tried to escape, it resulted in the bathroom being turned into one big puddle. FML
Today, I was taking a relaxing bath. My cat decided to sit on the ledge, which is normal for her, but today she fell in. I never knew how painful it was to be scratched down there until today. FML
Today, I was taking a shower at the gym when hearing a loud popping noise. Surprised and startled, I jumped and slipped, hitting my head against the shower wall that left a small gash. The pop noise was just someone blowing bubbles from their gum. FML
Today, my cat was in the bathroom with me. I was getting undressed to get into the shower. My cat looked at me after I'd undressed and then threw up all over the rug. FML
Today, I thought I was clever for doing my laundry while multitasking and making dinner. When I went to transfer my clothes from the washer to the dryer, I discovered that I'd accidentally washed a pack of gum that was in my pocket. The gum had melted into my favorite shirt, and I now have a sticky mess to deal with. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
"Sticky situation" comments and pussy double-entendres in 3...2...1...
perdix 31
Take yer dirty animal down to PetsMart where the motto is: We're not ******* about cleaning cats.
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Comments (109)
SoultheWolf 19
Best way to bathe a cat, and I have one that tries to kill me if I don't do this, use a free hand to keep it pined down by the neck in the tub and the other to do the soaping and water. Just make sure you don't get so much water around their face they can't breath! But at this point, its probably best to use clippers and shave the cat. Gum isn't easy to get out.
missnuthin 10
i dont think soap and water would get gum out of fur anyway. you need to use something oil based, just like if you got it stuck in your own hair. it may be best to dip your fingers in a little olive oil and gently work out one bit of gum at a time. your cat may end up looking a little greasy, but that'll work itself out over time.
Sir_Swaggington 6
Groomers. Duh. Or if that's too expensive just shave or cut off the gum covered fur yourself.
Tibe_ros 2
Technically, you can read in the FML op tried to bathe 'the thing'. Isn't that caring?
KiddNYC1O 22
"I had fun once. It was terrible."
nvo 6
Probably better left to the vet?
snowgr5 6
use ice to freeze the gum and it should come out pretty easy
redkellie 5
Peanut butter or olive oil
Sir_Swaggington 6
This is why cats suck.
lizziebear123 19
still have scars from last time??? you will always have the scars...they don't go away!