Today, I began my job volunteering at an orphanage in Beijing, China, working with 7-year-olds who just started learning english. We played a game where, if you got caught, you had to sing a song. I got caught, so I chose the ABCs. They all knew the song perfectly, I missed 3 letters. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I was at work at a preschool. I was sitting outside with the kids and was getting bored so I started singing. One of the little girls runs up and puts her hand over my mouth and tells me to stop. I'm in a select chorus at my highschool and plan to major in choral studies in college. FML
Today, the Chinese student I've been teaching English to got on stage in front of hundreds of people to read her final essay. She ended with, "What a fucking day." I don't swear, and I no longer have a job. FML
Today, at a tutoring center, one of the tutors looked at my worksheet and laughed. She then showed all the other tutors my mistakes and they laughed along with her. The best part? They all speak Chinese and they think I can't understand them. I'm Chinese. FML
Today, whilst singing at school in front of 300 visiting primary school children I forgot the second verse to my song and let out an F*** word with the microphone still up to my face. FML
Today, I volunteered to help out at an elementary school. I accidentally elbowed a little girl in the face while playing tag. And an hour later, a little boy flew out of his swing because I accidentally pushed him too hard. They're both siblings and are my child psychology instructor's kids. FML
Today, while working as a swim instructor, I started singing the hokey pokey to get all the kids used to putting their faces in the water. One of the kids was covering his ears. When I asked him why, he said "because you were singing." He's 3. FML
Today, I called the Vietnamese teacher at my son's kindergarten by my Chinese colleague's name. Luckily, she didn't catch it. I'm not a racist, I was just tired after a long day. FML
Today, I sang at a retirement home with my school choir. Afterwards, we went to speak to the old people, just to get to know them a little. The first woman I shook hands with asked, "Are you a boy or a girl?" FML
Today, I sang the "Itsy Bitsy Spider" song with a class of thirty 20-somethings because we're going to be kindergarten teachers. She made us do the hand motions too. FML
Today, I was volunteering at a neighborhood house tutoring a bunch of kids. Everything was going fine until one of them jumped on the table I was at, which broke and hit my knee. I swore in front of all the kids and my volunteer coordinator. FML
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Top comments
fxdxhk90 0
I'm just surprised that you wrote this without any spelling errors.
Sportsfan86 3
How do you miss 3 letters? If you're voulunteering, you should know it.
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Comments (183)
zankapfel 0
QUICK everyone learning a second language that's not even closely related to your native language, recite it's writing system without any mistakes on the spot! It's easy enough to say someone's stupid for not knowing the alphabet you've known all your life, but I've been studying Russian for 3 years and I'm still a little shaky on the alphabet. still, OP's life is ****** if they're an English teacher.
thabeast 0
dude the OP is American just look at his name bigballah thats american slang not chinese I took Jap. for 1 year and could recite 2 of their 3 alphabets from memory (their 3rd alphabet is like the chinese alphebet, pictographs and there are like 10,000 of them) and now Im in latin and know their alphabet easily any way OP total YDI cuz if youre that bad at the ABCs then you shouldn't have sung them and fail and youre retarded and all that other stuff...zzz
awdorable 0
You're right And don't feel bad about learning Russian. As A Russian, I can honestly say that it's hard to learn my language. OP- What do you expect, they are Asians, Asians are incredibly smart.
artcgirl 0
you know the Latin alphabet? big deal, its basically the same as the English, I'm in Latin too...
bexox 0
Just b/c it's American slang in their name doesn't mean the OP is a native English speaker. American music videos, tv shows, and movies are shown around the world. American slang is probably the easiest slang to learn. And if the OP learned English as a second language, it's not that big of a deal. If not, well, that's pretty bad.
Luneth101 0
#19, actually, the OP could still be Chinese. Just because they know American slang doesn't automatically make them American.
AlejandroGonzale 0
Ur an idiot for thinking this was their second language.
Edlaro 5
Not all Asians are smart but most Asian countries teach discipline that's why a lot of motor companies are owned by Asians.
jjjjessica 0
just say you were testing the kids to see if they actually knew the alphabet.
skullbuster 0
Why are so many of you so judgy? This person is posting from Beijing and did not claim English was their native language - just that the 7 year olds had it down pat and OP did not. OP did not claim to be volunteering as an English teacher or instructor, sounds like they were playing tag and s/he could just as easily have picked a native Chinese song. OP, make sure you teach those kids "**** OFF" so they know how to deal with people like these when communicating in English!
STWODAPOSKI 0
If English is not the native language, then why post in English? You are about as smart as the OP. 'F' both your lives....
skullbuster 0
All of the posts are in English. It's an English-language web site. Jeesch, talk about a moron. There are people posting from all over the world on this site you Anglo-centric prick. And English is not everyone's first language.
skullbuster 0
STWODAPOSKI - sounds like a dumb polack to me!
STWODAPOSKI 0
You are wrong on all accounts bud.... The site was developed by the French, the OP is clearly native to English (read 19 comment on the "nick") and my view is not Anglo-centric because I don't have a bias towards the English language.
pleasetryagain 0
Even if the OP is not from an english speaking country, he still implies that he knows english better than these kids.
skullbuster 0
Yes, some random poster thinks this person's alias sounds like American slang so he must be native English speaking. You are naive!!! I don't know why everyone here is so unwilling to give this person the benefit of the doubt, you know nothing about this person other than an alias they chose and the fact that they posted this from China and ****** up singing the ABCs. You can also look at #23 who is Russian, did not type his ******* post in Cyrillic, and formed a coherent English sentence. And look, his alias is awdorable, a take off on an American word, oh no - he must be lying! Xenophobic prick!
STWODAPOSKI 0
Regardless on the topic of primary or secondary language, OP is trying to teach English to these children; there should be no error... especially with the alphabet. BTW insulting me really helps your Wikipedia based argument.
skullbuster 0
The OP didn't say s/he was teaching the kids English, just that they are 7 year olds who had recently started learning English. They were playing a game that sounds similar to tag and had to sing a song if they were caught. Sounds like the OP chose ABCs as a novelty BECAUSE the kids were recently learning English, but it could have been any song and the OP didn't suggest it had to be an English one. The OP said they are volunteering at an orphanage, not teaching them a language. Talk about a wikipedia based argument. You are the worst kind of ignorant responder on this site. Lacking in compassion, full of assumptions about the OP, full of criticism, and full of shit. Get yourself signed up for a remedial reading comprehension class (an English language one) and then try talking to me again.
skullbuster 0
That's why this person posted their story here. The person made an embarrassing mistake in front of some 7 year olds, who knew better than they did. My point has been that I don't understand why everyone is so quick to judge and call this person an idiot. They are volunteering at an orphanage, is volunteering a requirement in China? Sounds pretty noble to me. And too many people forget that this is not a US-based website.
bexox 0
skullbuster... sounds like a stupid redneck to me!
usnwife 18
first language or not, its 26 letters... if op is volunteering to help 7 yr olds, I don't think its being too judgmental saying (s)he's an idiot for not knowing 26 letters!
YouSoDeservedIt 0
Based on the way you wrote your FML I'm going to guess that you are either a native English speaker or at least completely fluent. So how do you miss three letters? Honestly.
stephsteph90 0
was it the Greek alphabet or something?idiot
McA513M 0
Like #13 said, it's reasonable to be shaky on basic concepts if the other language is radically different then your own. Therefore, I clicked on both, because there's not enough information (i.e does your native language use the roman alphabet, or doesn't it).
Einstein714 0
back to sesame street with you, lol
girandwogpig 0
LOL EPIC WIN!!!!
SiLveRStaRLIGHT 0
Seriously? How?
hey2121 0
YDI for being an idiot
midnighthammers 0
you are a retard. ydi