Today, I babysat a four year-old kid, so his parents could go out to party. Once in bed, he yelled, "I want to go party!" After three or four times, I told him to go to sleep. Two hours later, he'd wet the bed, saying, "I told you I want to go potty!" FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, my 3-year-old fell asleep in our bed while cuddling me, and I let him stay since he was being so sweet. In the middle of the night, he took off his pants and pissed all over my head and back. FML
Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML
Today, I was babysitting four rather noisy and rowdy kids. After a two-hour struggle, I finally managed to get them into bed. I then asked them what they wanted before going to sleep. The eldest replied: "Can you tell us a story where you die at the end?" FML
Today, I babysat a 6-year-old boy for the first time. When I said it was his bedtime, he just screamed "Eat a dick!" at me. I was so shocked, all I could do was leave him be. When his parents returned, I had to make up an excuse for why he was still awake and watching TV, to save my pride. FML
Today, the 4 year-old I was babysitting came up to me all happy, saying she went to the bathroom like a "big girl." Knowing she was just potty trained, I asked if she'd remembered to flush. Looking at me confused, she said, "But it's in my room." FML
Today, while I was asleep, my three-year-old cousin wet the bed again. MY bed. FML
Today, I was babysitting a four year-old. He was mad and began hitting me. I told him to use his words not his fists when he's mad. He then began telling me how much he hated me, and that I should go die and never come back. FML
Today, I babysat the brattiest and most foul-mouthed 8-year-old I've ever met. After I survived three hours of it, his parents finally came home. He claimed I'd invited a boy over and that we did "stuff" on the couch all evening. They believed him. I didn't get paid, to say the least. FML
Today, I was babysitting, and I had to pee really, really badly. I couldn't figure out how to get the stupid toilet lock off, and ended up pissing myself. As I stood in the bathroom in tears, their child screamed, "No, no, pee-pee in the POTTY!" FML
Today, I was having trouble sleeping due to jet lag. I was finally sleepy and looking forward to a decent night of rest when my 4 year-old woke up and refused to stay in his room or try to rest. The next two hours involved him shouting at me, kicking me, and crying because he wanted Daddy, who is on a business trip. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Emily84 0
It's stories like that that make me really glad that when I was a kid, my parents taught me to say "bathroom" instead of "potty."
ThorsSon 0
#3 is dead on... did you REALLY think a 4 year old was telling you he wanted to go party?
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (50)
heart_broken 4
this is what happens when kids aren't born with teeth. shame.... but LOL!
Contra 0
I have a 4 year old niece, she says "Can I go to the toilet?" How is that kid being brought up?
ACDCfan 0
Haha, don't worry about it, it's the kid's fault. No one can understand them these days when they talk like that.
24788 7
lol, how long does it take a kid to go to the bathroom? 5 minutes? How long does it take to clean the sheets and clean the mattress? 30 minutes at least.
BTROCK 0
That's what you get for being American
SoccerPlaya17 0
hahahahha. and stfu #17 "Town/Country : Not specified" what too embarrassed of where you live?
irawk 0
hahahaha.. i blame you
liljon3 0
haha. i love that kid. so nice of him not to disobey you.
charby_fml 0
I always think it's strange when I hear American kids saying 'potty', cos with a lot of American accents it sounds almost exactly the same as 'party', at least to British ears. Why not toilet, or bathroom, or wee? I know he's only 4 but should have been told to say a different word. Not your fault -what else were you going to think when there was a party?
stellasue11 38
i agree with you, i can see whete the miscommunication came in
Metetris 0
Your relatives need new hobbies.