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I'll post this up here, because everyone gets a chance to read it that way (and it also answers #1's question). 'Turps' is an Australian abbreviation for turpentine, either wood turpentine, or the mineral kind that is called 'white spirit' in other places. It's the stuff you use to clean paint brushes. Although it can be used as slang for alcohol, in this context, it can only mean turpentine. It's the word you'd use 99% of the time when referring to the product. There - now no-one has to ask again, and we can all get on with our lives. Oh, and OP - WTF?! How could you not smell that a mile off?

Here in the Southern USA we just call them dish rags and countertops.

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What, if I may ask, is a Turpin?

You may not ask, you may use Google.

Yeah, WTF is a Turpin --' A turp is something else though, you dumbass. Google the shit out of it.

Dude chill, it was the autocorrect, I meant to type turp. "Dumbass"

Hihi ! I luvz trollin...

But use Google anyway.

19, You be trollin'???? XD I love Ray William Johnson

35 - Where does Ray William Johnston come into the picture?

Johnson* Stupid autocorrect.

JonaDona 2

Co za asy

45 - Dumb foreigner.

I'll post this up here, because everyone gets a chance to read it that way (and it also answers #1's question). 'Turps' is an Australian abbreviation for turpentine, either wood turpentine, or the mineral kind that is called 'white spirit' in other places. It's the stuff you use to clean paint brushes. Although it can be used as slang for alcohol, in this context, it can only mean turpentine. It's the word you'd use 99% of the time when referring to the product. There - now no-one has to ask again, and we can all get on with our lives. Oh, and OP - WTF?! How could you not smell that a mile off?

Co za asy!!! I love that one. :)

RWJ is not the only one who uses the term trolling. Also #56 your a dumbass. You don't even know why he is saying that.

62 - You're*. I do know where it's from, I was trolling and it worked, because a dumbass responded according to. Hahaha. Moron, I win. Good game, no re.

South African too.

you should be able to smell that when u walked into the room. bloody hell mate.

#57 I am glad there r people in FML who don't tell pplz "google it" cuz I hate when they do that, just answer it if u kno the question :D thanks even though I knw the meaning hehe

Oh, while we're at it, judging from the questions below... Tea towel: Dish towel or dish cloth. The thing you use to dry off dishes after you've washed them by hand. Bench: Kitchen counter. The surfaces in your kitchen where you prepare and serve food. Man, I never thought such simple terms could possibly cause such confusion. You people really need to get out more.

Whilst - being a Brit - I call "dish cloths" tea towels, i've never come across anyone refer to a kitchen surface as a bench... Just actual benches and tables for woodwork/metalwork etc.

Here in the Southern USA we just call them dish rags and countertops.

To #140 My lady needed me to explain what a "warsh rag" was and after 22 years together, she still can't fry taters or eggs! Thank gawd her Okie momma moved in with us, that old sweetheart knows how to fry 'em right! (Yes radical FML'ers, I done used that word "sweetheart" again!)

Thanks #57, because my Google search came up with "Trans-urethral Resection of the Prostate" and I was thinking WTF??

that's completely inspiring coming from what I'm assuming is a cute young lady ayame dear. and if your curious as to what I'm talking about its her interesting bio thing

I am Michigan. (the northern pennisula) and there is completely different slag for somethings that people from the lower pennisula have no idea what we are talking about and we are just a bridge away. Most of it is insults but some aren't. like washrag, wash (used instead of laundry), file 13 or bin (trashcan), hamper (laundry), tube (television), interwebs (internet), PocketFruit (Apple products) or saying youre traveling "up" no matter where you are going ( going up to Canada, going up to Mexico or Europe.)

Wow this is so nice because i'm french and theses comments help me to understand better thank you hehe :D

I know. turps killed all the sperm...

ouch White spirit.

How do you not smell that before actually applying it to your face?! YDI

Always check before you use idiot

oh that is quite indeedly terribleriffic

You cleaned your face with a Transurethral Resection of the Prostate? That makes no sense.

lol... he's right though it does not make sense.

Ya know, I thought from my Google search that turp meant turpentine, but I should probably listen to you Doc. After all, you are a doc(tor).

Turpentine is also known as "turps" according to wiki

Doc is that a real X-Ray???

Belle - it is indeed a real X-ray of a real patient of mine. It was a 12-ounce glass Coke bottle.

Wow! Where does one find Coke in glass bottles anymore?!

we actually had a pt with the same issue a year or so ago.

#47 - of all the possible FAQs Doc's picture brings up, I never would have guessed someone would have asked that one!

Is it even possible to insert a Coke bottle that far up your ass? Shouldn't it have punctured something by now? Unless of course you're trying out a new type of urinary catheter...

OCDC - it is quite possible, as you can clearly see by the picture. The butt of the bottle (no pun intended) was lodged over his sacrum, so I had to take him to the OR and put him under anesthesia to relax his rectum and anus enough to get it out. Sometimes people insert things so far that we have to actually go into the abdomen and make an incision in the colon. Fortunately, that's rare.

That must have been embarrassing for him. What exactly was he doing with a bottle shoved up his rectum? Besides the obvious, of course

Wow... Was he really calm about the whole thing? Cause my cousin helped out at an ER in her town's hospital and said people would come in and say they swallowed huge nails and stuck pins in their ears like it was completely out of the ordinary.

OCDC - his exact words were, "Doc, I'm not gay, but my wife is out of town with the kids, and I did a stupid thing."

He said he wasn't gay, but he clearly forgot to say "no homo", otherwise it would have been OK, and you guys could have laughed about it over a couple of brewskis.

wow how do you go from talking about turps to talking about putting a glass bottle of coke in your ass then going to get an x-ray of it??? that makes absolutely zero sense

I wish I could see the look on his wife's face when she finds out :) Do you get a lot of patients like him, who couldn't wait for their significant other to get home and then ended up getting something surgically removed?

HAHAHAHAHAHaHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA... this is the funniest trail ever!!! Doc, your patient is hilarious! I wonder if he knows you've immortalized him on fml.

115, it makes perfect sense.. Someone saw his profile picture and asked a question about it. There, mystery solved.

from one doc to another: LMAO, seen such things before, not for a while though. The same thought wen thru my head as I read that fml, "what does a TURP [procedure] have to do with this?"

Turps is Aussie slang for alcoholic beverages.

not always u dope. it's clear in this instance thats it's the product turpentine.

I can't recall having ever referred to one of my beverages as "turps". Although, I suppose I've called certain vodka home brews paint thinners, same thing. But never turps, and never as an everyday description of a cruiser or a beam or something. Where do people get these ideas from??

it's older slang. "we gettin on the turps tonight" is how u might use it. my dad often uses the term. lol bloody soak!

I have heard it used in like movies that poorly depict the Australian lifestyle...but pretty much only ever in the outback or whatever >.> never really in towns and cities.

o ok thank u lolz

thx 4 that image :D

your picture is really ugly

You're one to talk.

Turps = Turpentine?