Today, I asked my boss for a raise, explaining that another shop offered me a job at a higher rate, but I would stay if he would offer me the same. Instead, he fired me then called the other shop and said I was fired for failing a drug test. FML
Collection
Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Same thing different taste
Today, my boss found out I had applied for a much better paying job. He told me I'd do a better job and make more money there. Then he fired me. FML
Take it up with HR
Today, I got fired for failing a drug test for weed. My boss is the one who sells me weed. FML
Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML
Today, my coworker paid me back the $15 I let him borrow and we shook hands. Later, I was called into my boss's office, where he threatened to fire me for doing a drug deal in front of customers. The police are getting involved. FML
Today, my boss called me and asked why I haven't been showing up to work. I didn't show up because he fired me last week over the phone. Then he fired me again for not showing up to work. FML
Just Say Yes
Today, my boss decided to have the whole staff drug tested and fire everyone who failed. Out of an original staff of 14 people, only my boss, two coworkers and I remain. I now have four times my normal workload and am seriously thinking maybe I should've said "Yes" to drugs. FML
Today, I walked into my boss's office to ask for a raise, and walked out unemployed. FML
Today, my boss called me into his office. After yelling and firing me, his assistant comes in telling him he had mistaken me for someone else. He did not give me my job back, as he claimed it would make an awkward work environment. FML
How very dare you?
Today, I was getting lunch at a fast food restaurant. My boss was in front of me, and in order to get on his good side I offered to pay. Instead, I got fired because I guess my boss assumed I was making fun of his salary, which I knew nothing about. FML
Know your place
Today, I asked my boss for a raise. I pointed out that due to a technicality, if he hired someone to replace me, he'd have to pay them more anyway. He said he'd gladly pay more for "someone who knows his goddamn place" and made it clear I'll be jobless very soon. FML
Top comments
Mirorbo 26
WHOA!! What in the actual **** is wrong with your boss?! It's been a long time since my jaw has dropped at an FML!
MissWhitneyB 17
Your boss is an asshole! There has to be someone you can contact because he is out of line.
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Comments (217)
simoncat 11
If its false, you can sue your (former) boss for slander. He's a fuckwad. I can certainly understand why you'd want to leave...too bad the original incentive was only money.
eternal_malaise 10
Definitely sue. Also subpoena the phone records of your former employer.
kazmie 8
bc that's not illegal or anything. . . I hope you know a good lawyer
Sweet_Meli 11
I think you should've just kept the other shops offer to yourself . I mean it's one thing to ask for a raise, but it's another to say that if you don't get one your going to another place of employment. Either way, both you and your boss were at the wrong here
Treveyon56 14
Honestly if you think OP was wrong you clearly know nothing. This happens often. OP did nothing wrong.
Sweet_Meli 11
I'm saying they were both in the wrong here . Op should have tried asking for raise , and if he didn't get it , he'd leave. This would've caused his boss not to trust him even after giving him the raise, it's like black mailing . The boss was wrong as well though , for lying about him failing his drug test
Treveyon56 14
OP was planning to leave if not given the raise, so there really wouldn't have be any sort of trust issue nor and close to blackmail. It's quite often where one employer offers an employee of someone else a higher pay rate to which jobs. And sometimes the employee would ask his current boss for a raise because of this because they feel more comfortable in a place they know well. So I fail to see how OP is in the wrong whatsoever.
Sweet_Meli 11
Ok
TheAngryPrincess 3
Sue him. Horrible boss. Or tell people he frames you and spreads lies. don't work for hin
Nurd4lyfe 7
You should go all Horrible Bosses on his ass
JokersHQ 21
There has to be some sort if action, maybe even legal action, that you can get against him. I really hope everything works out for you. Just don't stand there and let this happen though, really go out and fight for it. Plus, he should have to provide proof do failing said drug test. Simply call the other shop and explain, hopefully they'll give you a drug test on the spot. Also there are different versions of drug tests that can tell as far back as 3 months if you used drugs. Opt for one of them to prove your former boss was lying. He will more than likely lose his own job.
norwegianboip 17
Hes an asshole
lolita88_fml 27
What a jerk, just show your potential employer proof that no drug test took place, or that if it did, you didn't fail it. Then report your old boss for slander. He can't just lie like that without evidence. Show your potential employer that that asshat's a liar.
rebellionwars 11
That's black balling; illegal. Piece of shit.
Treveyon56 14
You clearly don't know what blackmailing is.
rfid_fml 13
You clearly don't know what blackballing is... #105
Treveyon56 14
No I understand what it is. It would be blackmail it the boss had thread to tell the other employer but in the case his already did so it's no blackmail it's just sabotaging OP's chance for a better joke.