Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML
Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm Dad." FML
Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML
Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML
Today, when my boyfriend came home, I was crying and told him I was pregnant. His immediate response was, "Awesome! Pregnant girls are always horny and we won't need protection for the next few months!" FML
Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML
Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML
Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML
Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
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Top comments
macystar 14
Well then. It could have been worse.
DeoVolente 13
"When this one stops" ~kicks in nuts~
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Comments (87)
peanutbrat 11
You had to have known how immature he was if you married him.
dachayke 16
Get over it
Tannasgh 22
Hope you don't have a boy. Not much of a role model...
Taurus_ChicKa 37
Well, at least he's not mad/unhappy about it. Surely you knew how immature he was before marrying him/sleeping with him, though. If it bothers you now, well, I guess you're SOL. Congrats on the pregnancy though!
legalizenow 16
Well, when? :D
elvirakwow 16
That's just awesome.
Duh_0811 17
love love love the booby milk ♡
Pilos_in_manu_fml 7
BEST. REACTION. EVER... Not.
chelsea_liz 6
Unfortunate reaction... but I had fun re-reading it with an Alabama accent :)
mlto17 3
Watch out they are about to get WAY sore and sensitive. I started pinching my husbands nipples when he would hurt mine, he got smart fast.