Love: Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with,... - FML

By Anonymous - 26/12/2013 17:27 - United States - Bessemer

Spicy

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my husband. He responded with, "Well shit, when do these faucets turn on?" and started honking my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 647

You deserved it 5 813

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Same thing different taste

How d'you think?

By Anonymous - 02/04/2020 02:00

Today, I announced my pregnancy to my boss. I was expecting all sorts of reactions, except, "But... Erm... How did that happen?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 630

You deserved it 176

By Anonymous - 18/11/2015 02:13 - United States - Herndon

Today, I excitedly told my husband that I'm pregnant with our first child. With the most shit-eating grin, he said, "Hi, Pregnant. I'm dad." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 012

You deserved it 9 445

By wow - 15/04/2013 18:36 - Russian Federation - Saint Petersburg

Today, my husband of 6 years said in a grave voice that he had some important news for me. Jokingly, I said, "Why, did you get that cute colleague of yours pregnant?" He did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 75 944

You deserved it 6 734

By Anonymous - 12/04/2014 05:24 - United States

Spicy

Today, I found out I was pregnant. When I told my boyfriend, his response was, "I'll start watching pregnant porn to build up an attraction to it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 904

You deserved it 8 410

Not so funny after all

By oops - 21/09/2013 01:30 - United States - Wichita Falls

Spicy

Today, being the prank couple that we are, I decided to mess with my husband. When he got off work, I said, "The lady from your office called and said she was pregnant. From you." He immediately broke down crying, and said, "I knew it." Turns out, my fetus already has a sibling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 454

You deserved it 7 125

Big kid

By Anonymous - 08/09/2012 14:20 - United States - Rhodes

Spicy

Today, I told my husband that I'm tired of feeling like his "blow-up doll". His response was to honk my boob and make squeaking noises. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 369

You deserved it 5 707

By ananomus - 22/08/2010 04:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, my boyfriend started to kiss my boobs. I am pregnant and started my lactation period. Now every time he looks at me he calls me milky way. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 190

You deserved it 5 902

By wifeofafainter - 24/09/2015 06:31 - United States - Bronx

Today, I told my husband I was pregnant, then he fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 413

You deserved it 3 070

By Quiteannoyed - 09/03/2013 10:35 - Finland

Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 227

You deserved it 2 898

By U_U - 20/10/2013 19:20 - United States

Spicy

Today, my husband confessed his pregnancy fetish to me, and now wants me to wear a fake belly when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 077

You deserved it 5 125

Next

Top comments

macystar 14

Thursday 26 December 2013 23:57

Well then. It could have been worse.

DeoVolente 13

Thursday 26 December 2013 23:59

"When this one stops" ~kicks in nuts~

Comments

beaverteaser 16

Friday 27 December 2013 5:10

milk milk lemonade, round the back fudge is made

mccrightp 29

Friday 27 December 2013 5:19

He could have said, "Great news honey! Let's see if we can hear more on the radio! ("Dials" nipples.)

ViviMage 38

Friday 27 December 2013 5:50

Not for him!!

SuperMew 22

Friday 27 December 2013 6:52

While not the gushing, romantic response you might have wanted, at least he stayed and seems to be making humorous jokes. I know people who demand their wives/girls abort the baby.

thejimler 9

Friday 27 December 2013 9:37

Well at least it's not the WORST reply you could get after announcing your pregnancy, plus you now know you can "milk" him for favors! ;P

rebel501 4

Friday 27 December 2013 11:27

That's kinda funny you gotta admit but congrats on the baby! I realize its serious. But he's just happy I bet :)

deepikaarchie 13

Friday 27 December 2013 14:27

Gosh that wasn't a good way to receive such a beautiful news.

idknicholle 14

Friday 27 December 2013 14:39

I say he took that oddly nice. haha!

juicy_extasy 25

Friday 27 December 2013 17:56

Sounds like you married earl hickey

mattyiscool123 26

Friday 27 December 2013 23:16

A lot of buried comments

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Keywords

Video games Annoying Gamers Birthday Relatable Abuse Money Scams Social Media Kids School Education Parents Health Public freakouts Mental health Grieving Music Geek Poopoo peepee Awkward Jewelry Bikes Transportation Cops Family Fight Customers Work Gross

The Top

Today, according to my husband of many years, he was actually planning to ghost me after our boring first date. It was only the fact that I shagged him senseless that night that kept him around long enough for us to actually get to know each other. Hooray for me being a "loose slut" back in 1998. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 561

Today, my parents used to tell that me life gets way better after high school. Yeah, for everyone else at my school. They’re partying it up in college or travelling during gap years, meeting all sorts of people. I have to work more than full time because my parents kicked me out the week after I graduated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 453

You deserved it 93

The Top

Today, after the church service was over, my two year-old granddaughter started to sing into the microphone. She said, "Here Nana, you sing". I picked up the microphone and sang "Jesus Loves Me". She took the microphone back and said, "No he doesn't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 416

You deserved it 9 360

Today, I found out the guy taking the cubicle next to mine is the annoying dudebro who punctuates, like, every sentence he says with, like, the word "like" every, like, three words. Like… FML

I agree, your life sucks 867

You deserved it 113

Today, my 17 year-old is pregnant and I was fit to be furious, until my wife steamrollered over me to get to her, hugging her, and crying and how we’ll all raise it together as a big family. We can’t afford another baby. The daddy better be paying us something, or I’m gone kill him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 229

Today, my father informed me that I will have no chance of dating a good man if I keep up with these interracial relationships. And that he won't be supporting me through college if I continue this "rebellion." My boyfriend is half black and loves the same music, sports, and movies as my dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 836

You deserved it 2 046

Today, I sprayed a woman's perfume on a pillow, just so it would be easier for me to pretend I have someone to hug and cuddle with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 882

You deserved it 246

Today, I'm sick with the worst head cold of my life. For some reason whenever I cough, I also fart. Everyone thinks I'm just trying to cover up flatulence with fake coughing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 085

You deserved it 3 510