Love: Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The...

By KittyNeko - 28/12/2009 06:26 - United States

Today, I allowed my friend to talk me into going on a date. The guy's truck smelled like formaldehyde - I'm assuming from the snake that he apparently tried to turn into a necklace. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 090

You deserved it 3 197

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Same thing different taste

By newmoongirl1036 - 13/07/2015 02:03 - United States - Chicago

Today, I went on a date with a guy that I really like. At the last minute he informed me a friend would be tagging along. To keep his friend from being a third-wheel, I kept up a conversation, and managed to piss my date off. He thought I would be a better match for his friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 023

You deserved it 3 368

By Anonymous - 30/08/2011 17:35 - Canada

Today, I tried to impress the guy I like. He breeds reptiles, and I happen to have a snake and a lizard. I went over to his house to show them off. He opened the door just as my lizard fell between my boobs. He had to help me get it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 409

You deserved it 12 882

First and last date

By hairless by death - 13/08/2013 16:07 - United States - Santa Rosa

Today, I went on a date with a guy I really liked. The date was going great until he decided to try flossing his teeth with my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 309

You deserved it 4 243

By r4inb0wbrit3 - 13/07/2012 07:37 - United States - Townsend

Today, I was on a date with a great guy, and we were really hitting it off. While we were walking in the park, a woman who smelled like the devil's toenails and looked as if she hadn't bathed in a year passed us. I whispered to my date, "Look at that disgusting woman." It was his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 530

You deserved it 37 956

Classy

By dontask - 01/10/2010 01:55 - United States

Today, the guy I've been crushing on for years and I finally went on a date. While on the date, he threw up in my purse and stuck tampons up his nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 866

You deserved it 4 436

By Court - 22/02/2010 02:12 - United States

Today, my best friend had set me up on a blind date. The guy demonstrated at length that he could do different cartoon voices such as Donald Duck, Droopy and many others the entire time. Oh, and he also kept wanting to talk about his farts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 561

You deserved it 3 583

By Anonymous - 28/03/2011 18:52 - Macedonia

Today, my boyfriend tried to cure me of my snake phobia by buying one. When he took it out of the cage, it bit him. Now he's terrified of them too. Even worse, he dropped the snake, so it's now loose in our house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 807

You deserved it 6 885

By whatever - 09/08/2009 20:12 - United States

Today, I went out with my ex-boyfriend on a date. The night consisted of me sitting in the back seat of his friend's truck while they drove around to pick up things for the party they were going to have that same night. After they picked everything up, he asked where I wanted to get dropped off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 914

You deserved it 27 404

By badplannning - 30/11/2015 04:55 - United States - Naperville

Today, my date suggested we go to 10:30 p.m. movie so we could "talk" in the car afterwards, when the parking lot was empty. Thus, at 1 a.m., I thought we were going to make out. However, he only asked where I get my car air freshener from, had me write down the scent, and then suggested we go home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 400

You deserved it 2 241

Nice guy

By Anonymous - 08/05/2022 00:00 - United States

Today, my friend fixed me up with a guy from her workplace. I'm painfully shy, so I really appreciated it and was looking forward to meeting him, since she described him as very sweet. Once the date got started, he continuously made fun of my speech impediment, until I finally left in tears. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 562

You deserved it 122

DoomJeff91 2

Monday 28 December 2009 16:49

At least it didn't smell like chloroform. Then, you'd be in big trouble.

Ashora 0

Monday 28 December 2009 16:28

Formaldehyde is a preservative. The OP likely meant that her date was using a dead snake preserved in formaldehyde as a necklace.

Comments

dontFYLkae 0

Wednesday 30 December 2009 5:12

srry fed_up_thespain bout ur dude issues and I can't help but to the about panic at the disco when I see the word formaldehyde cuz I love that song(build god, then we'll talk)!

bowtheboo 0

Friday 1 January 2010 7:20

Best FML ever! A snake necklace? You're lucky you even made it through that date alive. Those have got to be signs of a serial killer. It starts with snake necklaces, soon it's human jogging pants.