By Anonymous - 23/02/2015 07:45 - United States - Hatfield

Today, away at college, I called my grandmother to hear how she was doing after her knee surgery. She ended up talking about Hooters and how I should work there because of my "rare body". When I mentioned I've been studying computer science, earning a 3.8 GPA, she replied, "But you're a girl." FML
I agree, your life sucks 38 434
You deserved it 3 356

Same thing different taste

Top comments

iAmPaul 49

Well, she certainly has an archaic way of thinking.

iAmPaul 49

It pisses me off when people say that. Being old does NOT make it ok to say those reprehensible things with her outdated values and mindset.


iAmPaul 49

Well, she certainly has an archaic way of thinking.

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iAmPaul 49

It pisses me off when people say that. Being old does NOT make it ok to say those reprehensible things with her outdated values and mindset.

I disagree, #9. Sometimes you just have to excuse people for what they say because of their upbringing. Otherwise, you're just going to be pissed off at people all the time when they really don't know any better. You're only hurting yourself by getting angry at people for the way they've been raised. I mean, why should you care what some old person with outdated ideals thinks? It's not like they determine your destiny. You do.

It's odd though because usually an old grandma wouldn't want her granddaughter working at Hooters, even if she didn't understand the concept of a successful career woman... she really just sounds like a crazy old bat

@28 Even going by how an old woman might have been raised, it was not common for women to dress and exploit themselves the way women do at Hooters. It was more common for them to just get married, or at the very least hold temp jobs or be teachers or nurses and such... nothing like Hooters was a popular choice back when

I'm pretty sure there have always been jobs for women willing to flaunt their bodies for cash. The grandmother may have been okay with that when she was young, but the idea of a woman with a career, in technology no less, was likely still unheard of. Either that, or she's just crazy, like you said. Either way, can't get too mad at her for her archaic ideals.

#32, there isn't anything wrong with a nursing or teaching job, both of those require extensive schooling and resumes. As for values of the elderly, that depends on where they were raised as much as the time period, not everyone has or had completely conservative values, so their grandchild wearing shorts and a tank top while waiting tables wouldn't be all that shocking.

as Abraham Lincoln once said when referring to the southerners "Try not to judge them too harshly, they are exactly as we would be under the same circumstances." Doesn't excuse saying that kind of thing but it's important to try to empathize with people even if you disagree with them.

iAmPaul 49

@gracehi Completely wrong. I CAN be pissed off at people who say it's ok for the elderly to say ignorant things, writing it off as "their upbringing". So ******* what if they were brought up to be ignorant? There's no room for that kind of idiocy in today's society, and there's no excuse to be harbouring/defending ignorance on the basis of the logical fallacy of appealing to tradition.

JustinJK 21

She can died because she's old too. Ignorant old hag.

GhostDuck 30

Age doesn't matter, it's still an offensive comment.

Well, then, suit yourself, Paul. Continue raging about the thoughts of a dying generation if you choose. I prefer to disregard them and carry on merrily, knowing that I will be successful with our without their approval, but that's just me.

@42 Why would you want to be pissed though? Why waste that energy on some old dingbat who doesn't define who you are?

What they were trying to say is why waste your time? If she's a 70 year old lady do you really think you bitching at her for 10 minutes will change 70 years of thinking? It's not worth the energy.

iAmPaul 49

61, 64, 84: You're all idiotically acting as though my being angry about something is the worst thing that could possibly happen. I don't lose any sleep over it, or anything that makes me angry/annoyed for that matter. Being annoyed with something doesn't mean I spend all day obsessing over it. Stop acting all high-and-mighty.

Grace Hopper. Look her up. Age ain't an excuse.

Grace Hopper. Look her up. So should OP's grandmother. Age doesn't count here, really. *Edit Sorry for the doublepost, didn't see it come up the first time!

chococat251 9

I don't think you should completely excuse what she says. I mean obviously older people are more likely to have a more "traditional" way of thinking, but that doesn't completely excuse her comments.

Oh really, Paul? I guess that's why you've continued to comment on this thread throughout the day. But then again, so have I. Hmmmm...

My great grandfather made sure all his daughters went to college. My grandmother was a lab technician when my mother was born in 1953. Age is no excuse for idiocy or sexism.

iAmPaul 49

100 - You've not made a single legitimate point thus far.

So if she used then word? "Its ok because shes old"? Um no

I think most of us will be like this. What we think now won't be what they think in 40/60 years, there is no right or wrong opinion on others. The only thing that is right is to not push your own opinion upon someone else. People here calling her ignorant and stupid should grow up, she is in the wrong for giving her opinion, just like you are all in the wrong for being rude as she doesn't have the same opinion. Keep it private, just tolerate each other (if you disagree with them)

iAmPaul 49

127 - No, she's being ignorant. Her opinion is ignorant and bigoted, and there's no reason to tolerate it. Your tangent is fallacious.

Wow! Paul the racoon is very thin-skinned!

#134 Anger to oppose biggotry? Hold on I'll give you some gasoline to put out that fire while you're at it.

@36 But wouldn't the oppression of women (aka not accepting the idea of women with gender stereotyped careers) be along the lines of old-fashioned conservative values? This is why the "she was raised in a different time period" explanation doesn't sit right with me.

iAmPaul 49

Your sarcasm is unproductive and doesn't detract anything from my point.

No harm in earning a little extra money on the side while you study what you love.

potato63 10

Ha! She still lives in the past

llamarrama01 21

Maybe work there to pay for your college?

#5 yea cuz hooters seems like the type of place that can afford paying for a workers college.

Stripping pays way better. The 'G-String Scholarship' is a thing for a reason.

Sexism is wrong and being wrong is for women

Stupidity is wrong and you are being stupid.

And for the record, it's a joke. If you thought I was serious then you're as retarded as I am.

Everyone knows it was a joke, it just wasn't funny

*Australian voice* And here we see the elusive FML troll in it's natural habitilat, making sexist jokes to induce a reaction from it's victims. But the troll must be watchful for the wild FML staff, as they have been known to hunt the troll's kind. Fascinating.

This is hardly an FML, you are smokin hot and will be earning six figures shortly after college...

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Do you have a point or are you just rambling?

I didn't realize physical appearances and gender determined your interests.

As a girl in the pursuing an automotive degree, it gets pretty ******* annoying when guys point out how rare it is to see a girl in the shop. Your chest and lack of dick shouldn't determine your interests.

Nothing about gender determines a person's interests, except that even today, parents are more likely to encourage tech fields for boys than girls. Although, there are several basic differences between men and women in terms of the way they think and interact which leads STEM fields to be more male dominated. You also won't find many highly-social people in STEM; it's somewhat dominated by introverts. But again, culture and upbringing; boys are taught to examine and tinker while girls are generally pushed towards social and interpersonal fields. It's all a matter of how we've decided people should think and act in society. Not to condone the grandmother's comment, though. You'd think she'd 've more open to that idea since the computer field was actually dominated by women running program cards when she would have been young. It wasn't for boys until they started making them into personal gadgets marketed to boys.

I'm a female studying computer science, and I have more "non-feminine" things I like. (I don't consider myself to be hot though) Problem?

Rare or not, guys in predominantly male fields who treat their female counterparts differently are doing disservice to the field and everyone who populates it. I understand that it can be difficult to overcome certain societally mediated gender dynamics, but despite this, it is necessary to make an effort to regard and treat everyone in these fields as professional, intellectual, and autonomous individuals (regardless of their gender). While studying for my CS degree, I had several classes where I was literally the only female student, so I speak from personal experience. Being forced to continually deflect focus away from myself and back onto my work (where it rightfully belonged) was uncomfortable and degrading. #10, I realize that you likely meant no offense, but I hope you'll consider how harmful it is to commodify female engineers instead of celebrating them for their professional achievements outside the scope of their gender.

Of course women shouldn't be treated differently when studying CS or other fields where males are commonly the majority. But stating that something is rare, when it is, does not equate to treating differently.

That's not entirely accurate, 129. It seems the main point I was making has been overlooked. When contributing to this discussion, the commenter in question chose to focus on the looks and gender of female computer scientists (which would almost certainly not be a discussion point if the FML was submitted by a male). This is a perfect (although admittedly minor) example of the disparate treatment women receive as a result of that mindset. And it does, in fact, constitute unequal treatment. Downplaying it as someone merely "stating a fact" selectively ignores the broader implications of such a statement.

Computer science? Is that code for using your breasts to trick twelve-year-olds into getting you that YouTube money? Or is it the one where you go on Twitch and have the same twelve-year-olds donate excessive amounts of their parents' money to a webcam feed of your ill-fitting tanktop?

stuner56 22

She'll be writing code so we thumb down stupid comments on apps like this

I didn't know computer science was a legitimate profession! Thank you for enlightening me! Gosh, my whole world view is flipped.

conman531 23

Tell her a 3.8 GPA in computer science is worth more than a rare body for Hooters