Today, I found out that masturbating on an airplane isn't frowned upon like they say in the movie 'The Hangover'. It's actually illegal. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was on my way home on an airplane. The guy I had to sit next to was reading a book with naked girls in it. About 15 minutes into the flight, he had an erection and started to giggle. It was a 2 hour flight. FML
Today, as a flight attendant, I had to deal with a passenger staring at a stewardess constantly and masturbating. His wife was sitting next to him and didn't mind. FML
Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML
Today, I was getting dirty looks on the train whilst air strumming the guitar to a song on my iPod, after glancing at the reflection in the window I realized it looked like I was masturbating. FML
Today, my mother thought it would be a good idea to tell me that I was conceived on an airplane toilet. FML
Today, I opened my laptop in the train to watch a good film I had downloaded. Of course, it was a fake and the whole carriage was allowed to watch and hear five seconds of butt licking. FML
Today, I had to explain to my boss that masturbating in public is inappropriate. This isn't the first time this has taken place. FML
Today, while using the bathroom on an airplane, someone walked in on me wiping my butt. That person just so happened to be the stranger I was sitting next to. It was an 8 hour flight. FML
Today, on a dimly lit red eye flight, I woke up to see my mom's head bobbing up and down in my dad's lap. I guess giving out stealthy blow jobs next to your sleeping son is no big deal. FML
Today, I found out my parents joined the mile-high club. While I was on the plane. FML
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Top comments
MidnaLink 35
No shit, Sherlock. What made you think that was a good idea?
mike3775 39
I’m so glad I grew up in an era where common sense prevailed
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Comments (7)
MidnaLink 35
No shit, Sherlock. What made you think that was a good idea?
mike3775 39
I’m so glad I grew up in an era where common sense prevailed
cacheson 42
I hope this is sarcasm because you absolutely did not lol
BurnInDemonFire 39
"It must be true! I saw it in a movie!" Dumbass...
rogue92 6
Don't touch yourself outside of your own home.
cacheson 42
Unless it’s a hotel room that’s booked in your name.
MidnaLink 35
Or any place sexual activity is allowed, really.
EBrogen 12
Everyone else's life sucks for having to put up with people like you. You actually deserve everything that happens from the situation.
Sady_Ct 38
Did you find out the hard way or the easy way?
BurnInDemonFire 39
I'm guessing it was the hard way. Or at least the semi-hard way.