Today, at work, I decided to try and impress this girl walking behind me by holding the door open for her. As she was walking through, I inadvertently pulled the door too hard. It slammed against the wall and ricochet back, hitting her right in the face. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was walking through a heavy door at work, so I reached behind me to catch it so it wouldn't slam shut. Little did I know that my boss was walking through right after me. Instead of catching the door, I caught a handful of his crotch. FML
I don't know my strength
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
Today, I was at the store with my wife. As we were walking out, I helped an elderly woman get through the door. As I was opening the door, my foot got stuck on the door and my face was catapulted into the woman's breasts. It wasn't until we got into the car that my wife burst into hysterics. FML
Today, at a meeting, I had a heated argument with the only female employee at the office. A little later, I managed to hit her in the face with a door, giving her a bruise. Nobody believes it was an accident. FML
Today, I tried to impress a girl by draping my arm over the back of her chair. I ended up elbowing her in the nose. FML
Today, I went to a job interview, and a guy ahead of me went to enter the building, only to walk face-first into a glass door. I rushed to help him up, and after we had a good laugh about it, I turned to walk inside, only to walk straight into the door as well. FML
Show off
Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML
Alexa, play "Mr Loverman" by Shabba Ranks
Today, I was at a store when I saw a cute girl from my school. Trying to act cool, I went to hold the door for her. Too bad it was an automatic door. FML
Are you OK?
Today, I walked into a glass door at a busy mall. Not only did I face-plant in front of a crowd, but I also left an almost perfect imprint of my face on the glass. FML
Thanks a bunch
Today, I was leaning over cleaning a table at work, when my pretty coworker came up behind me and slapped me on the butt. I was so startled that I slipped and smashed my face into the table. Now she can't look at me without laughing. FML
Top comments
ohhboyy 0
BOOOOM HEADSHOT
unlucky91 0
Well, either thats the end of meeting her or maybe you'll have a story to tell your kids :] but yeah FBYL ( **** both your lives). i hope she doesn't get a bruise
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Comments (119)
MSJ91 1
I hold doors for everyone, as long as I don't have to wait more than 3 seconds. XD I understand that chivalry is dead, but common courtesy shouldn't be. Besides, holding a door is hardly an impressive gesture. The door hitting her in the face could have been used to start conversation, after some genuine concern, if it knocked her off her feet. =P
rinnychan 2
I chose YDI before I even read it, because of 'tried to impress'.
TRayT 0
I agree with #34 It's not chivalrous to hold a door open for someone, it's common courtesy. If I walk into a store and someone else is coming out, I hold the door open (since I have to open it anyway) and let them out before entering. It's not impressive, it's not even gentlemanly. If some attempted to open and close a door while I was heading out of the door, I would find that extremely rude. "Oh, you opened a door that you would have opened anyway, and decided to hold it open a second longer than it would take you walk through it, I am so impressed"
angeldo6695 0
SO? even if you did held the door for her, she'll just say thank you, its merely manners, nothing to impress her there
brunothisisfunny 0
This should be written by the girl "today, i was leaving work when this asshole in front of me slammed the door in my face. I have a black eye now" or "Today, this cute guy in front of me tried to be kind and hold the door, but miserably failed and slammed it in my face. Then, he tried hitting on me! Egh"
farmgirl 3
#15 - according to your profile you're single - ya think there might be a reason for that?
DizzyDemon0 9
As many have stated..holding a door for someone is just something you should do to be polite...Smile at them and nod or perhaps try a little comment or two. Those people will smile back and think better of you, and they will continue to smile and pass it on.
Everybodyfails 0
Who in their right mind would try to hit on someone they work with? at work people are usually sober, distracted with other stuff, and if it doesn't work out you'll have some very awkward meetings. If you want to impress a girl, go to a party or bar.
pinkpony 0
Don't hold the door for a girl because it's "impressive", or because she's a girl, but because she's a human being and you should ALWAYS hold the door for people, not just when you think it will get you some.
seayjoel 0
Smooth move Dr. love