Today, at Walmart, I overheard a lady telling a teenage girl that the secret to keeping a guy for life is giving him anal, but that it's important to clean your "shitter" beforehand. I can't believe these kinds of sick freaks actually exist. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at Walmart with my mom when a guy next to me let out a series of vicious farts. Assuming it was me, my mom chewed me out in front of the guy and made me apologize. The man looked at my mom and said, "Children, they're so immature." FML
Today, at the supermarket, I picked up a pack of toilet rolls, at which point my 5-year-old daughter turned to me and screamed, "A CLEAN BUTTHOLE IS A HAPPY BUTTHOLE!" in front of a dozen other people. I have no idea where she heard that. FML
Today, at Walmart, a crazy old woman bitched me out for being pregnant. She kept following me around, calling me a stupid teen slut and saying she hoped my baby died so I could live a "normal life." I'm 26 and just very short. FML
Today, I was casually shopping at Walmart. Everything was normal until the young guy browsing the aisle next to me suddenly approached me and whispered "sperm" into my ear. My spine has never experienced a chill like this one before. FML
Today, as a nurse, I had to tell a 15 year-old girl that her red, sore asscrack was caused by consistently not wiping her ass properly. Seriously, when I examined her there was still poop, even though she swore she wiped this morning. I had to teach her how to do it properly, at 15 years-old. FML
Today, I was buying ingredients for a salad. I had only picked up a few cucumbers, when an elderly lady came up to me and murmured, "Make sure you use lots of lube, or that'll hurt. Been there, sweetheart." What the HELL? FML
Today, I talked to a teenage girl that came in for debilitating constipation. Turns out she'd stopped drinking water and had been purposely holding her bowels because her new online boyfriend convince her it’s unattractive and unladylike for girls to poop. FML
Today, at Walmart, a lady came up to me and informed me that I "look like the kinda skank that'd give it up on the first date". FML
Today, in a supermarket, my four-year-old son whispered to me, asking if the checkout lady was able to wash between her fat rolls. She heard. FML
Today, I had diarrhea in a Walmart bathroom for 15 minutes. Apparently, so did the guy in the stall next to me. He attempted to make small talk to pass the time. FML
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Top comments
Willibobs 33
Think 'sick freaks' is taking it a bit too far. I'm more offended by your judgement of them as opposed to their conversation.
WCARlover 35
I really hope the teenager has some other person in her life to serve as a role model
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Comments (221)
grumpytanya 4
I think people are misunderstanding the 'sick freaks' part. Though I do hope OP meant it as the 'freaks' are the ones who tell young girls that they only way to keep a man is to give him anal. That should be talked about by the people in the relationship in a healthy setting to see if both party's are alright with it. Not an adult telling a young girl that she had to do it. It should be her and her partners choice.
rmllavaneras 19
Ah, those lovely parents that teach you the important things in life: giving anal instead of having self-respect so you're not a **** toy.
Bragi 12
149: What's wrong with **** toys?
PimpNasty16 13
Yeah I'm WAAAAY more offended by you using the phrase "sick freaks" that only shows how absolutely arrogant and TRULY stupid you are, like your stupidity really blew my mind
ninety 25
Oh yeah, way to go. You don't like someone else "judging" and name calling, so you resort to the same tactics. Way to rise up and stick it to the man.
al92754 5
Well you were at Walmart
Bragi 12
Those of you that consider sexual practise a bad way to maintain a relationship are living in a fantasy world. What if it had been father to son, telling him to eat pussy and remember their anniversary? Here in the real world people will leave if not sexually satisfied.
mrtonyanderson 20
Too bad it wasn't all of you.
Soviet_American 29
You were at Walmart. What more can you expect?
mattrd_fml 31
what's so bad about anal?
Goblin182 27
Didn't you hear what granny said? Nothing is wrong with anak, as long as you clean your shitter first.
kalbrek009 20
Does op know for sure that the girl was in fact "underage"...yes it would be bad advice to give a "child", however...if the girl just looked young for her age, that's a whole different thing. If op was so "concerned" maybe they should have stepped up & said "you shouldn't give that type of advice to a minor"...otherwise, maybe op should just mind their own business so as NOT to look like a judgmental "sick freak" themselves?
Alastrina_fml 20
No sexual practice is enough to keep a SO for life. It's nice, and it helps, but it's not the only thing to keep a relationship and nobody should ever think so low of themselves that they do anything to keep it.