Today, at my job as a fast food manager, I saw one of my employees "trying to pick the bugs out" of our cookies. They were the raisins in them. FML
Collection
Wild Nights Out
Last call, bad decisions and 3 a.m. texts you'll regret until noon. Cheers.
Today, someone had been stealing my brownie at work every day, so I sprinkled cocolax on one and waited to find out who the culprit was. Turns out it was my manager. Needless to say, I'm fired. FML
Today, after 3 years of hard work, very little vacation and no raises, our boss got us a crappy box of drug store cookies as an employee appreciation gift. Which he ended up eating. FML
Today, I work at a bakery. As I was putting out some cakes with fruit on top of them, a customer asked me how we get the little hairs to stay on the raspberries, and if we glue them on. FML
Today, my boss ate a small piece of paper off her desk, thinking it was frosting. I have to work for this woman. FML
Today, I work at a chocolate factory on the sanitation shift. I was under a machine cleaning and a spider fell on me. I started freaking out and a coworker thought I got caught in the moving parts and frantically pulled me out and alerted my boss. Turns out it was just a piece of caramel. FML
Today, I polished off the delicious iced gingerbread cookies in the pantry. I'd assumed the little flecks on them were speckles of broken icing, but as I went to throw the cookie bag away, a larva crawled out. The hundreds of flecks were moth eggs. I've been eating the cookies for three days. FML
Today, my coworker brought chocolate muffins to work for everyone. This would have been really nice if they hadn't tasted like rotten blueberry muffins spray-painted brown. I reflexively gagged after taking a bite and coughed up a brown mush in front of her. FML
Today, I was working at a donation center. I was having a really rough day, so my fiancée dropped me off some cookies. At the end of my shift, the manager told me I couldn't take them home because they were donated and therefore they were "company property." FML
Today, while working my shift at the grocery store, we ran out of muffins. I'm a little overweight, and I guess that's the reason an irate customer accused me of eating all of them. FML
Today, I made a small batch of cookies and took them to work. Mostly everyone took one, but nobody said anything until I asked how they were. Someone asked what my recipe was, because it tasted like I'd forgot to add sugar. I bit into one. I had. The cookies tasted like muddy mush. FML
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Top comments
Hunthas 17
I think I would rather have bugs in my food than raisins :D
orphanclubber 8
You don't just let it slide if someone Is attractive I hope you are joking
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Comments (95)
pjsr 33
Give that employee an F for F-ert. Said employee probably recognizes that spelling and is quite familiar with the F letter grade as well.
Wizardo 34
Yeah but raisin cookies are why so many people have trust issues in the world. *I thought it was chocolate chip, sobbing uncontrollably...*
VisheshSood 9
Good to know I can still get a job someday.
BicBoi996 12
Didn't know macdonalds sells cookies now
hellphone_fml 37
They always have sold cookies and they are actually pretty good.
Dif_fml 12
I bet they were high.
headofmedusa 15
As if taking literal bugs out would make the cookies any better.
KittyLahv 27
That's what I'm saying. If I were the manager, I would've seriously reconsidered hiring the dude. What if the raisins actually happened to be real bugs? He'd have picked them off and put them back to be sold? Not sanitary at all; someone could get sick.
PurelyCanadian 18
That's mildly disturbing.
nshetland 10
That guy must've been on another planet if you know what I mean
mjponso 10
To quote Rolf from an episode of "Ed, Edd, 'n' Eddy": "What no-nothing would dimple the cookie biscuit with the doohickey of a rabbit?"
sjbartholome 14
Do you want fries with that?