Today, as my mom was getting ready for a date, I told her that I think it's too early for her to date, since she divorced my dad only a week ago. She then said, "Don't worry, I'm only in it for sex." FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, I told my mom I broke up with my boyfriend because he wanted to have sex and I wasn't ready. Her reply? "Well, you can't stay a virgin forever." FML
Today, I called my mom to see how she was doing. She quickly hijacked the conversation and said that she's signed me up for a dating site, because she feels bad that I can't find a decent man. I've been dating my boyfriend for seven months, and she's seen me with him multiple times. FML
Today, while discussing my family on a date, I mentioned that my parents are divorced. She immediately got up and left without a word. FML
Today, my mom decided the time was right to give me the sex talk. Towards the end, I had to excuse myself to the bathroom. As I came back, I overheard my dad telling my mom that I'm so unpopular, the only time I'll get laid is when I'm being put in a coffin. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
Today, My mom walked in on me and my 2 year crush about to have sex. When she saw us she said "oh I'll just wait outside, I know it wont be long anyway." FML
Today, my wife and mother of my kids said she doesn't want sex. Or a divorce. FML
Today, I realized that my mom has not had a date, or had sex, in 50 years. I've become her 'Husband-Son'. FML
Today, my baby-crazy mother expressed her concerns that I haven't conceived after a whole two months of marriage. Her advice amounted to "get divorced while you're still hot, sleep around until you get pregnant, then marry the winner." When I complained to my father, he supported her. FML
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my dad. I thought it was a good idea at the time, at least until he took her aside for a private chat. During the chat, he told her all about my two previous marriages and advised her to "get out while you can". FML
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Top comments
ihartmytdi 23
To each their own; everybody needs someone
TypicalSenpai 14
It could be her way of coping, sadly. I'm sorry OP. .-.
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Comments (125)
Captain_Debilos_fml 13
What is the problem ? They have been probably estranged for a few years. It's moronic to wait for a piece of paper to start living again. You probably unconsciously expect them to get back together.
helveeta 11
Mom is getting some, what's wrong with that? Sex is fun and natural. She probably shouldn't have told her child her motives tho.
afrostybird 25
Oh TMI Mum!
nmrhog 15
i'm guessing they have been separated for months if they finalised their divorce last week. You're mother wants to move on, you should support her.
Shade1982 21
I don't really see why support should be unconditional. Since we don't know anything else about the situation, I really don't see why op *should* support his/her mom.
THEDARKLORDOFALL 17
I don't see the problem here
bad_boyfriend 10
Good for her. What kids don't often think about is that by the time a divorce is final their parents most likely have not had a physical relationship for over a year. Everyone has needs.
SPN_lover666 27
OP, your mothers dating life is none of your business. She can do whatever the Hell she wants.
Shade1982 21
It's called freedom of opinion. Op is allowed to have an opinion on the matter. She's just not obligated to do anything with it.
Pinkiss_fml 21
At least you don't have to worry about her getting you a new father.
rogerover 19
She probably hasn't gotten any in a long time. A relationship will typically deteriorate for a while before it ends in divorce meaning no sex.
xxsilverwingsxx 2
What your parents need is not your place to say. If they felt a divorce was best then it probably was in their situation. You have no right to tell your mom that she cannot date just because she had a divorce recently. Everyone handles that sort of situation differently.