Today, as I was pressed for time, I opened some canned food for dinner. When my children were served, they said, "Mmm, this is best meal you've ever cooked for us!" I cook healthy, balanced meals every day. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Same thing different taste
Today, after years of providing daily various home-made colourful meals for three kids and a husband, I was asked to "cook something cool, like instant hamburgers, not that lame healthy shit". FML
Today, my kids told me that for the FIRST time, my cooking was delicious. I made Kraft dinner that night. FML
Today, I bought ingredients for one of my favorite meals and went home to take a nap. When I woke up, my sister had cooked them for everyone else in the house, who ate it all without me. I was told that I shouldn't be angry, but instead proud of my adult sister because, "She cooked!" FML
One happy family
Today, I spent hours cooking an amazing dinner for my family, who had just gotten home from a trip, so we could spend some time together because I'd started to miss everyone. When they got home, they saw it all laid out and just took plates to their room, without even telling me they were home. FML
Let him cook
Today, due to my wife saying I never cook and that we always order pizza, I spent a good hour preparing dinner. While serving it to my kids, they started complaining. My wife told them to shut up. When she took a bite, she looked up at me, smiled, and said, "Do you, you know, want to just order pizza?" FML
Healthy lifestyle goals
Today, I made a healthy, delicious dinner. My girlfriend picked at it until it went cold, then stuck it in the fridge. Later, she devoured a giant bowl of sugary cereal, then complained all night that her stomach hurt. This happens a lot. FML
Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML
Picky
Today, my parents told me not to make plans for dinner as they were bringing it home. Normally, that would be great but they brought home slop from some buffet that had just opened. Everything was greasy, too salty, or bland. I told them they could have it, and made my own dinner. Now I'm being called, "The Food Network critic." FML
Kitchen Nightmares
Today, tired of my husband complaining that my food was basic and bland, I went out of my way to learn to cook using new recipes and fresh ingredients. He complained that I took too long to make dinner, and that the food is "fancied up shit." He can cook his own meals now. FML
Open Minded
Today, I made a tasty, healthy plant-based lunch for my family. They ate a few bites, spat it out, and then went to McDonald's "to eat real food, you know, food with meat in it." FML
Top comments
cndrow 0
Healthy, balanced meals are usually not tasty. So why would this be a surprise to you? My mother is a health-nut and does everything she can to eat organic/healthy things. I eat out at least once a week and love carbs (though I'm not overweight, and neither is she). She's in a degenerative state of health, I am not- and she is only 18 years older than me. "Healthy living" helps some people, doesn't affect others. Everyone's bodies are different.
skine 0
The simplest thing you can do is to learn to use spices. Not only do they have (in general) negligible health effects, but they actually decrease caloric intake and increase water intake. Making spicy foods, especially with the capsaicin found in jalapeños, Tabasco sauce and other hot peppers, will actually increase metabolism, in addition to lowering caloric intake. Invest in kosher salt and black pepper, and use them as a base for rubs for meats (rubs are spice mixtures which are, well, rubbed into the meat before cooking). Kosher salt will help tenderize meats, as well as flavor them, and black pepper just tastes good. Use fresh and ripe vegetables whenever you're serving them raw. Variety. Pretty self-explanatory. Allow some boxed or canned meals, and feel free to play with the recipe. For example, when I cook macaroni and cheese, I generally boil some corn or peas with the pasta, then add a can of tuna in with the cheese and milk. Add some oregano and garlic to Beefaroni. And for F***'s sake, listen to your kids and ask what they like.
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Comments (66)
shorgenfunkel 0
High protein, high fat (healthy fats like olive and fish oil), low carb meals are generally pretty good tasting. Healthy and good tasting are in no way mutually exclusive. It just takes more effort initially, eventually you'll be running on auto-pilot.
Falcon_Punch 0
#8 scares me a bit. Probably because it's hard to detect sarcasm in text. HOPEFULLY because it's hard to detect sarcasm in text.
blueworld_fml 0
Kids who are young enough not to recognize the effort DO NOT LIKE healthy food. In that universe, canned food alone rules. And it pretty much rules until they're your age with their own whiny kids. THAT is when you win.
ohwowthatsucks25 0
it's all the same to a kid
little_musician 0
I don't think #8 was being sarcastic. What #8 doesn't realize is that all that crap that's in unhealthy foods stay in your system--they don't magically disappear when you exercise. Chwis88 was a complete and utter idiot to comment so. Eating healthy will do wonders for them. Don't stop. They'll thank you for it when they get into their teen years and their self esteem doesn't suffer from taunts from being overweight.
uhoh1717 1
When you attempt to make food healthy on purpose it tastes bad, honestly eating "unhealthy" food isn't that bad for you unless you never excercise. The american lifestyle isn't about the unhealthy food it's about the way we live it. Trust me as a south indian we have some of the most fattening and unhealthy foods on earth. For example we have something called dosa very fattening and we eat them for breakfast all the time, notice there isn't an obesity problem in India while America is the unhealthiest country. We focus on health like it's a chore just live your life and make smart choices. For all those guys who think your kids will thank you in their teen years they won't because being fat isn't about the food, half of the most athletic/popular teens have terrible eating habits, if you wan't to cook healthy find a meal that is healthy not make a meal healthy if that makes any sense. Just take everything in moderation
Dale_shackleford 13
Actually, we aren't even that close to most obese. Mexico, the pacific islands, and even a couple European countries beat us.
24788 7
Kids like to eat garbage. Can't blame them.
DecembersShadow 2
Yes. I often liked digging in the trash for my meals :)
ZeroCSS 0
Everyone knows healthy food tastes like crap.
Uepari 0
#6, if you're a female, I'd kiss you. And to miss "health food", seriously, why not, for once think of your kids?
skiBOAT 0
Not an FML. Take a break from healthy stuff. Too much of anything is bad for ya.