Today, as I was about to enter a public restroom, a man walked out and said, "You may want to hold your nose in there. I just took the biggest dump of my life." It was the ladies' restroom. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML
Today, as a joke, my friends pushed me into the men's restroom and held the door shut. As I was trying to push the door open, I heard a voice behind me say, "Wow. Immaturity, huh?" I turned to find a guy taking a dump in one of the urinals. FML
Today, I was at Walmart and had to use the bathroom. I sat down and farted real loud. I didn't realize someone was in there with me until I heard a voice say, "Dude, that was a good one." It was a man's voice. I then realized I was in the men's restroom. FML
Industrial logs
Today, I took a massive dump at work and clogged the industrial toilet. Since I used the unisex one at the end of the hall, I watched my super hot coworker walk in after me. And then she ran out immediately. Everyone had seen me walk out before her. FML
The Destroyer
Today, I was waiting to take a dump in a gas station restroom. A 300-pound man walked out, shook his head, and said, "I'm sorry" to me. FML
Take a break
Today, I really had to take a shit. My coworker had gone on lunch break and I was alone in the shop. There were no customers, so to the can I went. Cue a long series of loud wet farts and splashes, followed by the flush. I emerged to see the horrified face of some old lady and her grandson who'd heard everything. FML
Big Muff Fuzz
Today, I was using the restroom at school. What I thought was going to be just peeing turned into a humongous fart that echoed in the toilet bowl. Already embarrassed, I opened the door to leave. Two girls, who obviously heard, were giggling and saying, “It’s always the fat bitches.” FML
Stinky and gross
Today, I was at a crowded restaurant and rushed to the bathroom. In my haste, I didn't notice I had walked into the men's room until I was washing my hands and a guy walked in, gave me a puzzled look, and said, "You're brave." FML
Noise machine
Today, I had to use my friend's toilet. His pretty cute sister was in the kitchen adjoining the bathroom, so I smiled and said hi on my way through. I then had the loudest and most vile-sounding shit of my life. FML
Today, I was taking a dump at a public restroom. As I reached over to grab the toilet paper, I realized someone had peed on it. FML
Top comments
Soloman212 28
At least he warned you?
LaLince 40
Scent of a man
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Comments (57)
colvindj 22
dafuq? why was he even in there?
Dynosaur_dollie 38
clearly he was in there because he had to take the biggest dump of his life, didn't you read the whole FML?
lightanddark 17
well, time to find a new bathroom.
Soloman212 28
MUAHAHAAAAAH, JUST AS I PLANNED
haley_baby92 7
That's so gross..
ShakeDisPlace 10
Did he clog the toilet up too?
WICKEDxANGEL 13
lol I bet
crisanba 18
Nice. I'm sure some of us know that "type" of emergency
brave_josh 9
Of his whole life? You might want to slowly back out of there OP. It might still not be too late
Frenchtony 17
It's probably that Scottish guy from the movie Austin Power, good luck...
Dipmunch 13
fair warning I would say
Obey_StudBoii 23
This makes me wonder if it was the "ugly" woman with the other fml who complained of arthritis.