Health: Today, after taking a shower, I decided to weigh myself. Curious,...

By Mr. Shawzy - 15/01/2009 11:43 - Canada

Today, after taking a shower, I decided to weigh myself. Curious, I peered down. I couldn't see the scale. I am fat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 096

You deserved it 23 238

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Same thing different taste

By ms piggy - 15/12/2011 21:52 - United States

Today, stepping on a scale for the first time in years, I had to lift up my stomach to see the number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 024

You deserved it 43 110

Simple answer

By pathetic - 29/05/2009 02:35 - Canada

Today, while getting ready for work, I realized that all my pants were getting a bit tight. When I got home from work, I went in to the bathroom and stood on the scale, which confirmed that I have gained a few pounds. I then realized that I was eating while standing on the scale. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 076

You deserved it 59 345

By fatflabbyfail - 20/02/2010 06:09 - United States

Today, after having my bath, I realised that I've gotten so fat that I have to lift up my butt cheeks in order to dry underneath them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 153

You deserved it 42 320

By unknown002 - 12/02/2010 01:25 - United States

Today, I stepped on the scale because I'm trying to maintain a good weight. The scale read that I had lost 6 pounds. Feeling really good about myself, I stepped off the scale only to see that the corner of the scale was sitting on the rug, making the scale mess up and tell me the wrong weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 227

You deserved it 18 676

By trev - 30/05/2011 16:12 - United States

Today, when I weighed myself on my scale, it broke. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 143

You deserved it 28 950

By ihncredible - 10/12/2012 23:32 - United States - Macomb

Today, I stepped on the scale and realized that I weigh more than the amount of money that I have in my bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 187

You deserved it 8 078

It creeps up on you

By Anonymous - 10/08/2021 14:01

Today, I looked down while taking a piss and could only see my belly button. Wow, I’m fat now. FML

I agree, your life sucks 673

You deserved it 420

By tripleBBB - 09/09/2018 01:30

Today, I was in the shower when I realised that maybe I'm getting a little too fat. I was scrubbing the old belly when a dollar flew out onto the floor. I'm 23. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 706

You deserved it 2 632

Own it

By annie - 26/05/2021 10:57

Today, when I stepped on the scale this morning, I broke it. Now my family won’t stop making fun of me and calling me names like "chubby" and "fatso". The scale was really old and I weigh 110 pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 491

You deserved it 237

By Fatty - 28/12/2011 07:57 - United States

Today, I found out that I've been using a "Trick Scale" that my family bought to boost my self esteem so I'd think I was losing weight. I found this out at my physical, where I learned I have actually gained ten pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 539

You deserved it 4 884

PixelSlayer247 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 1:48

Bart: Um, Dad? Homer: Huh? Bart: Towel rack...

lemonsmcbob 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 9:38

i have been there, it is depressing.

Comments

HanisMan01 0

Thursday 5 February 2009 17:03

Buy a bigger scale?

B4SK3TB4IL 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 5:47

basketball is fun and also a great workout!

Karma_Geddon 36

Wednesday 30 January 2013 15:06

Perhaps a talking scale?

Jasper_fml 0

Monday 16 March 2009 22:50

ew.

diet_cocaine 0

Wednesday 25 March 2009 6:09

one of my favorites honestly it waz a pleasure to read this cause now i know im skinnier than someone else HAHAHA

atomicmrpelly 2

Thursday 9 April 2009 14:16

I have a periscope you could borrow...

lemonsmcbob 0

Saturday 11 April 2009 9:38

i have been there, it is depressing.

geesquared 0

Friday 15 May 2009 0:20

FYL because that sucks but YDI for letting it happen.

123sploosh 0

Tuesday 19 May 2009 2:40

ahh me too, i feel for you, but i bet your fine

juicyfresh 7

Sunday 12 August 2012 8:16

judging by your picture you don't seem to have that problem anymore

crazymofooooo 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 6:52

Haha you dumb fatass... It isn't that hard to figure out if your fat

PixelSlayer247 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 1:48

Bart: Um, Dad? Homer: Huh? Bart: Towel rack...

jo0owe 9

Sunday 23 March 2014 1:59

dad....its say that its not toxic! XD sorry i had too, i think im gonna go watch thé Simpson

mikew85 0

Saturday 13 June 2009 8:24

Hit the gym, it'll be hard work, but you owe it to yourself and your family to get in shape.

Keywords

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The Top

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 972

You deserved it 2 303

Today, my girlfriend was on top in reverse cowgirl. After she orgasmed, all I heard was, "Oh fuck" and she clenched her butt to try stop, but it was too late, she shot diarrhoea up my stomach, chest and neck. The only reason I didn’t get any in my mouth was because it all got caught in my beard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 079

You deserved it 410

The Top

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 641

You deserved it 4 002

Today, while working at a client's house, I noticed that their sliding calendar was several months off. I fixed it. Later the daughter saw and started crying. Apparently the date was the last one her mother had set it to before she died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 913

You deserved it 58 967

Today, while studying in the library, I felt a sudden urge to pass gas. There were not too many people around, so I let it go while in my seat and it went unnoticed. What caught the attention of everybody was the puddle slowly forming under my seat. Turns out, I farted so hard I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 1 070

Today, I sold my Xbox 360 on Craigslist. I met the dude at the mall. I gave him my Xbox and a handshake for buying. I left without the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 866

You deserved it 70 364

Today, my boss gave me the task of firing a recently-hired coworker next Friday. This guy spends most of his off-hours working out, probably abusing the fuck out of steroids, and to whom prison is like a bed-and-breakfast. I fear for my life by this point. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 665

You deserved it 2 829

Today, I discovered the hard way that training in martial arts means nothing when the thug harassing your wife at the bar has a mate stood behind you ready, willing, and able to kick you square in the balls with a toe-capped work boot while you’re getting into your correct fighting stance. FML

I agree, your life sucks 636

You deserved it 355

Same thing different taste

Simple answer

It creeps up on you

Own it

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