By failureatlife - 27/04/2014 19:16 - United States - Ponchatoula

Today, after beating myself up for being useless and not being able to do anything right, I managed to choke almost to the point of blacking out, on a piece of lettuce. FML
I agree, your life sucks 40 344
You deserved it 6 182
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Top comments

WhatsOpTic 11

Damn salads these days trying to kill people

161 3

Comments

JMichael 25

This is why I do not eat salad.

33 1
pwnman 33

I am afraid to death on salads.

2 12
1tsmenoah 20

#1 Well you don't say? I wonder why he put this on FML

10 3
incoherentrmblr 21

Was it at least a tasty salad? Do you need a tasty beverage to wash it down?...

5 5
TheCanucklehead 22

Your being challenged OP. Life wanted to test you. You passed the test. Put a smile on your face, and roll on. Life will tear you again, so you smile and beat the challenge again. These small victories matter. They're a step before your bigger ones, and the happiness you WILL have. :)

3 1
KushCrushin89 10

What's with all the happiness and light shit? Maybe OP is a monumental ****-up whose only purpose is to serve as a future warning to younger generations of what not to be. Stop feeling sorry for yourself dude, it's a rough world out there with no room for more pansies.

1 2
kangx1 28

The same lettuce you ordered on Amazon?

10 0
Lacist 19

Guys at least make your comment relevant to what you're replying to, we are all guilty of wanting our comment at the top, but cut the blatancy.

0 3
WhatsOpTic 11

Damn salads these days trying to kill people

161 3
gjikvtj 18

And the doctors say that salads are healthy...

50 0
enddmd 27

They only act out in self defense!

36 1
meepmerp 20

Maybe OP wrote this beyond the grave :O

3 2
WhatsOpTic 11

I eat salad all the time! Not a lot of lettuce in it, but lots of tomato and cheese! And big croutons! Actually one big crouton...with tomato on it...okay fine its pizza!

0 1
MRP360 14

I choked on spinach....before you judge it was a fairly long piece of spinach and it was covered in sauce :|

8 2
JBChristian 47

Shouldn't have bought lettuce from Amazon.

2 1
j_cat187 19

was it on the entire head of lettuce?

8 21
XTheDesertSongX 17

"on a piece of lettuce." "a piece of lettuce." "piece."

39 0
warsun 27

One piece........where'd my straw hat go?

3 7
OysterPearls 33

Romaine calm, OP. You'll get through this.

55 1
ElloSubjects 9

Lettuce discuss your problems OP. Edit: Crap sorry after looking down further I noticed someone less made the same pun :/

24 0
ElloSubjects 9

Grr typos everywhere... last time I post at night

7 1
Matt_Hazard 16

@ #5 Ah ha ha, I see what you did there.

0 2
illegalbeagle69 23

Pre-monday.. still gets you pregnant with the hate of monday.

4 2
Quackadoodledoo 13

Because it makes you choke? So your diet consists of...baby food?

2 15
FracturedMinds 21

Because there is only salad and baby food. My favorite baby food is a cheese burger.

28 1
ChristianH39 30

26 I don't think you can expect sound logic from someone whose username is quackadoodledoo lol

12 3
glabberfasted 16

Also... You can choke on baby food if you try hard enough.

9 0
OysterPearls 33

I agree, you can't just leave us with the tip of the iceberg!

14 5
xblaine 17

Salad is dangerous

4 2