Health: Today, after a long day, I energetically took off my belt to...

By Anonymous - 14/04/2016 05:13 - United States

Today, after a long day, I energetically took off my belt to take my pants off and relax. In doing so, I whipped the belt around in the air, causing it to spin around and slap me right in my tender ballsack. I almost threw up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 833

You deserved it 5 806

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Same thing different taste

By LostInSunday - 15/08/2016 08:11

Today, I accidentally slapped myself in the face with my belt when I pulled it from my belt loops too quickly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 264

You deserved it 2 792

Pissed

By Matt - 13/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at work, I wet my pants. I had to throw my tighty-whities away. Since I didn't have underwear on, I chafed real bad and got a rash on my butthole and near my balls. I had to push my boyfriend off of me, all because it hurt too much to touch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 168

You deserved it 483

By anonymous - 11/10/2016 05:23 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I was taking my phone out of my pocket when it caught on the fabric and began to fall. I managed to catch it, but also smacked myself in the balls in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 593

You deserved it 2 207

By Anonymous - 04/04/2014 17:26 - Dominican Republic - Santo Domingo

Today, I was feeling adventurous and decided to freeball it to school. As I went to sit down during first class, I managed to sit on my own balls, scream, then collapse on the floor gasping. My teacher thought I was screwing around and gave me detention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 087

You deserved it 20 341

Nuts

By Painful - 05/10/2009 04:16 - United States

Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 921

You deserved it 39 994

By ricksterile - 29/10/2011 00:44 - United States

Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 077

You deserved it 10 842

By cookscatastrophy - 08/12/2009 08:19 - United States

Today, in aerobics, while stretching, my friend leaned over to pull the long hair off my pants. It was my pubic hair sticking through my pants, and I screamed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 654

You deserved it 47 120

Wakey wakey

By sacked - 22/02/2010 19:51 - United States

Today, I was woken by my alarm. I got really tangled up in my blankets, and struggled frantically to untangle myself so I could turn off the alarm. I not only kneed myself in the face, but I accidentally punched myself in the nuts too. Hard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 366

You deserved it 24 006

Looking like a fool...

By Pantsontheground - 09/08/2018 12:30 - United States - New York

Today, my pants kept falling down. Since I didn't have a belt on, I decided to tuck the waistband around my underwear to keep them in place. While on a date, I tried to adjust my pants, but ended up pulling them down along with my boxers. In the middle of a restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 407

You deserved it 3 022

By whoslade - 28/06/2012 17:36 - United States

Today, I woke up to a punch in the balls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 915

You deserved it 4 586

sheaboy121 6

Thursday 14 April 2016 15:17

Now if your kids are messed up you know why

JosephKorso 15

Thursday 14 April 2016 15:20

Did you proceed to watch The Nutcracker?

Comments

Mynamewontfi 40

Thursday 14 April 2016 15:51

I hope someone was there to film it, since it would make for a great video.

RoyalMGN 8

Thursday 14 April 2016 15:57

well Op I hope you feel better I know the agonizing pain getting hit in the family jewls can produce

Colon_Man 17

Thursday 14 April 2016 15:59

If you whip your belt off don't all your pouches fall on the floor? That's where I keep all my accessories; batarangs, bat-grappling hook, bat shark repellent...

zainman13 26

Thursday 14 April 2016 16:16

How did you manage all that and get your FML accepted?

LiveForSenpai 13

Thursday 14 April 2016 16:23

I feel ya, OP... when I was a kid, I went to this ultimate frisbee camp, and this little kid whose extended arm was my exact groin height stood next to me and tried to throw the frisbee really hard. He forgot to let go T-T

tin_cup 27

Thursday 14 April 2016 16:29

Now that's talent!

BubbaYoshi117 10

Thursday 14 April 2016 18:34

Oooh that sucks. I've had that happen with the buckle (hook side out, luckily), and I was basically paralyzed in a protective crouch for what felt like a lifetime before I could even squeak out an "ow".