Today, a girl I have been wanting for years told me she was drunk and needed me to take her home. On the way home she was very frisky and flirty, and I kept telling her to wait till we got to her place. When we finally arrived, she passed out on me and I was stuck there watching her sleep. FML
Collection
Thanksgiving
Questions about your love life, a burnt turkey and the cousin who knows everything: Thanksgiving, a contact sport.
Today, the girl that I have been trying to get with for over a year told me she was drunk and just gave her first blowjob to some guy. FML
Today, I went out drinking with my friends and my boyfriend met me there. We then decided to come home, planning an intimate moment. Once home, I got on top of him and went to kiss his neck. Next thing I know, I'd fallen asleep right before we'd even started. FML
Today, I finally got the chance to sleep with a girl from home who I'd wanted for a long time. She has low blood pressure problems though, and when things got hot, she passed out while she was on top of me, fell and hit her head on the night stand. FML
Today, the guy I've been sleeping with for the last three weeks got really drunk. I drove him home from the party and took care of him. At 2am he asked for the phone. When I asked what for, he said he wanted to drunk dial his girlfriend. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me that last night after I got drunk, I passed out mid-pump while we were knocking boots. FML
Today, I finally convinced a girl that I liked to have sex. I decided to swoop her off the feet like the movies and carry her to my bed. I ended up hitting her head on the door frame, knocking her out. FML
Today, I went out with a girl who I really love. We arrived to her house and before she got out of the car, I attempted to kiss her as planned. Still drunk, I grabbed her head and twisted it when I kissed her. She's now wearing a neck brace. Real smooth. FML
Today, I woke up in a daze after a long night drinking. I felt a subtle nudge on my shoulder. I was at my ex-girlfriend's house, passed out on top of her, with no pants on. Her dad was, in so many words, informing me that I had to leave immediately. FML
Today, a friend of mine got a bit drunk, but said she was fine and didn't feel drunk at all. I took her keys anyway and said she could sleep on my bed, while I slept on the floor next to the bed. I was rudely woken up in the middle of the night to her rolling over and vomiting on my face. FML
Today, I met a great girl at a party. We talked alone, and she made me promise I'd dance with her later. When I saw her later, she was unconscious, and in an ambulance. She'd collapsed, and the entire party assumed I'd spiked her drink. FML
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Top comments
zebra_pillow 0
why would you f**k a drunk girl anyways that's like rape
its_milly_silly 0
YDI for trying to get it from a drunk chick... so... wrong!
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Comments (169)
brentludlow 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
^^this
carlover2050 3
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
what are you waiting for do her anyways!! or try and wake her up at least.
paprikacha 9
I know most of these comments along the lines of 'do her anyway' are either sarcastic or made in jest, but still... : (
bulll_crap 0
lucky
f_your_life_09 0
y the hell would u watch her sleep? creep. that's ******* weird. u should have left.
undercoverninja 9
I couldn't agree more.
T1A2Z3 35
He did say she fell asleep on him. Maybe he couldn't move without waking her
maph3rs 0
stuck there watching her sleep. is that in ur usual spot by her window!! perv. bet u had a feel!!!
drinkmoxie 0
So wait your FML is that your not a Date Rapist. I would hate to see what your proud of
ajrhockey5 0
you don't watch her sleep, you LEAVE! dumbass.
willsnodgrass 0
if she was so hot you should have pulled over and played while she was frisky
Ft9princess 0
Ydi for being a pervert with bad intentions.