The urge

By Anonymous - 13/07/2020 05:02

Today, I realised why I’m so irritable these days. My former flatmate smoked so many cigarettes that, now he’s moved out and taken the smoke with him, I’m going through nicotine withdrawal. I realised this after I saw cigarettes in a shop and couldn’t stop staring at them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 002

You deserved it 202

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Hopslammer - 17/06/2011 01:39 - United States

Today, as I was smoking a cigarette I realized that it's time to quit. This realization came to me after a particularly violent coughing bout forced not tar out of my lungs, but rather poo out of my bum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 232

You deserved it 49 040

By Username - 03/08/2011 03:33 - United States

Today, I quit smoking. It seems that when you don't smoke for almost 24 hours, your sense of smell comes back. I then noticed how disgusting my apartment smells. Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 805

You deserved it 51 967

By Emmaraine189 - 28/04/2016 02:22 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, I saw my cat licking something on the side of the road and went to check what it was. It was someone's old cigarette. I now know why she wants to be let out so often: She's addicted to nicotine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 382

You deserved it 1 302

By Namnack - 02/02/2010 19:38 - Netherlands

Today, I found I had rolled, and was smoking a cigarette without realising it after proudly entering my third day of being a non-smoker. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 867

You deserved it 32 529

Light 'em up, boys

By Clogged - 25/11/2020 17:02 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, a week after I quit smoking, I lit up again. Was it stress? Cravings? No. I haven't had a crap since I quit, and can't take this gut ache anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 831

You deserved it 177

By Thepunchline - 11/08/2010 09:19 - United Kingdom

Today, it's the third day since my mum quit smoking, and I realised that her health-drive is having a negative effect on my own health when she bitch slapped me down the stairs because she didn't get a joke I told her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 218

You deserved it 4 214

By zaneey - 17/01/2009 18:41 - Australia

Today, I decided to quit smoking and put on a nicotine patch. I decided to have one last cigarette and ended up sick at the doctors with nicotine poisoning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 667

You deserved it 42 727

By Anonymous - 13/03/2016 15:00 - United States

Today, I'm going cold turkey with my drinking and smoking habits. I'm so irritable, I seriously considered running down an old lady who was taking her damn sweet time crossing the road, then shooting the guy in the car behind me for honking at me like I was holding everyone up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 611

You deserved it 3 639

By Anonymous - 18/05/2019 20:00

Today, I realized cigarettes are my cure for boredom. I bore myself out of $2000-plus a year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 1 871

By Mattrd - 05/02/2013 00:42 - United States

Today, my coworker told me that I needed to quit smoking because it was making me look and smell horrible. I've never smoked in my life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 676

You deserved it 3 926

diraven 15

Monday 13 July 2020 23:13

Good thing your roommate didn't smoke crack

sjhs321 13

Tuesday 14 July 2020 0:32

If you didn’t smoke, and he did, why wouldn’t you make them smoke outside?

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Monday 13 July 2020 7:09

Well, cheapskate, start buying your own smokes and quit relying on free second-hand smoke.

diraven 15

Monday 13 July 2020 23:13

Good thing your roommate didn't smoke crack

sjhs321 13

Tuesday 14 July 2020 0:32

If you didn’t smoke, and he did, why wouldn’t you make them smoke outside?

TheSentinel05 8

Wednesday 15 July 2020 0:02

I actually didn’t know you could get addicted thru secondhand smoke. I grew up around smokers and never got addicted. I guess everyone is different and some people have different physiology than others, etc