Today, I found out my home health patient purposely drinks tons of prune juice every night so I will have a huge mess to clean up in the morning because I'm "a lazy bastard" and I "need to work harder." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I spent ages prepping, chopping, bagging and freezing lots of fruits and veggies for my mom. I also bought her a juicer and alkaline water to help combat some of her health issues. I walked into the kitchen to see her mixing her juice with vodka and rum instead of the water. FML
Today, I was told I'm lazy by my boyfriend because I skipped work. He skips his all the time and when I get home still have to cook and clean up after him. FML
Today, at my job, I was so tired and aggravated that I accidentally mumbled, "I need a drink." One of the patients I was taking care of heard me and said, "Me too." I work at an addiction rehab facility. FML
Today, I was looking in the refrigerator for something to drink. I found a jug of lemonade with a piece of paper on it saying "Mom's Lemonade, Don't Drink!" I was really thirsty, so I ignored it and drank the whole jug. My mom is about to have a colonoscopy and had filled it with laxatives. FML
Today, my roommate reached a whole new level of laziness: I caught him casually peeing into an empty beer bottle while laying in bed. FML
Today, my physician, a known drunk himself, told me I was drinking too much and I should quit before my kidneys decide to divorce me and take the house and car with them. FML
Today, I got sick of my flatmate stealing my food so I decided to sabotage a leftover pizza with laxatives. I came back home later in the evening after a night of heavy drinking. Guess what I had to eat in my drunken stupor. FML
Today, I was tired from an all-nighter I'd pulled because I thought I had the next four days off work. I got called in, and went because I have bills to pay. However, the amount of energy drinks I drank to stay on top of my job duties gave me such bad diarrhea, I had to go home. FML
Today, after I finally recovering from being ill, my husband complained about the house being messy, that I needed to clean up after myself. I filled 2 large tote bags with his stuff laying around the house, and one small stack of medical bills for me. It took me hours to clean. But I'm the messy one. FML
Today, I was cashiering at a grocery store when an elderly woman came through my line buying prune juice. She then whispered to me that last time she bought it, she "blew up her toilet". FML
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Top comments
TonyGoCapitals 0
Wow what an asshole no prune intended
SkoomaKi 28
Put Viagra in that prune juice and see who's laughing.
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Comments (97)
Tones217 9
Put anti-diarrheal medicine in the prune juice to make them constipated. No mess for you!
Hiphuray4peas 27
I was going to suggest that! Although drugging someone without their knowledge sounds like a bad idea...
kcTheGreat 2
You're a home health aide. It's part of your job. Seriously. It's hilarious when people post on here about actually having to work while being on the clock.
Quikraptor 8
You're an idiot. They take care of the person and what do they get in return? Shit. Literally and figuratively. You have no idea how hard the person works, so you don't get to sit there and judge.
downtime 13
Sounds like the sort of thing you'd expect to hear from someone with a large trust fund or no experience in real work.
lotrgeek 10
PSWs, whether in a nursing home or home care, work our asses off for little to no respect or appreciation. We are entitled to vent a bit, especially when shit like this FML happens. Come do our job for a day and then I'll listen to you say we're lazy and don't want to work. Here's a big **** YOU to you! OP- I feel your pain. Some patients/residents are just jerkholes!
Bluekaren16 19
Might as well feed him spicy foods while hes at it. That'll show him hehe
TheyCallMeDamien 18
Make that the last thing you do for the day. Let them lay in their own filth.
AzWolf 5
Prune juice is pretty normal for many elderly. Just do your job and be happy you're working. If you don't like home healthcare, hit the skids.
downtime 13
Nobody doubts that, but when drinking it is done ONLY as an act of malice then you have every right to be pissed off.
DoubleBlumpkin 4
"Accidentally" spill his poo all over his lap and see if he still likes the prune juice diet. On another note, at least his system is cleansed.
lilicoco_fml 5
Hmm, wonder if you work with my sister OP. La Salle area?
inventindascene 5
If I was you I would get on his good side to stay clear of the back side
theonlysweetpea 10
Ask if you can get him removed from your list or if you could get transferred cuz that's ugly
dsl1123 8
I would spike his drink with something opposite to clog him up so he doesn't crap for a week then stop and give him something to open up the flood gates then call in sick for the next 2 days. That stuff they give you before a colonoscopy will have him on the thrown ALL NIGHT LONG !