By fuckthepopo - 21/01/2012 02:31 - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend has been cheating on me. In tears, I called my best friend and told him everything. He responded with one- or two-word answers throughout, but I felt better all the same. That is, until I heard him begin to take a loud piss half-way through my sentence. FML
I agree, your life sucks 29 829
You deserved it 6 473

Same thing different taste

Top comments

every1luvsboners 11

When you gotta go, you gotta go, no matter what's going on. I'm not going to piss my pants for anyone; unless you're into that sort of thing.

Help comes in many forms,i guess in this case it was piss


Help comes in many forms,i guess in this case it was piss

BarDownDaily 12

Mans gotta do what mans gotta do.

n_epic_fail 14

The fact that you got a guy to listen to your relationship problems is close to a mirical, so just be thankful (piss or no piss). But if you suggest kidnaping your cheating ex and feeding him to snakes he might be a bit more interested. Revenge and bonding time.

Well technically 1, her help did not come from piss but piss is helpful if you got stung by a jellyfish or some sort of that.

The_Troller 14
JoshTheMaggot 8

At least he didn't take a shit. That would be worse

28 Yes. Quoting yourself somewhat quoting someone else, "Mans gotta do what mans gotta do".

I was thinking you were saying that pissing on a jellyfish sting would do nothing but instead you were calling my comment stupid. Well then good day to you sir, yada yada yada ya, I bid you a farewell.

Guys...what if he liked her and he got friend zoned.....that might be why he shows a lack of interest

4- I was literally about to say that. OP, of course I'd be offended, but considering it's a guy they might not be as delicate about it? I look at it this way- he didn't hang up on you so he could pee! At least he listened & tried, rather than hanging up or not picking up.

GoW_Chick 14

Anyone notice the OP's username "fuckthepopo" weird right, I mean it makes you wonder if it has anything to do with the FML it's self.

MfailK 0

popo as in police you DEtard.

MfailK 0

popo as in police you detard.

well see when i really gotta use the bathroom i put it on mute.

GoW_Chick 14

I know what popo stands for DIPshit, I was saying the username was weird and didn't fit in with the FML, so shut it, thank you.

100 - maybe her boyfriend is the popo! lulz.

27 actually urine is in no way good what-so-ever for jellyfish stings.

ChronicBluntz420 7

Op, no guy wants to be stuck in the friendzone.

cookie_3008 4

Funny how you think your friend peeing is worse than your boyfriend cheating... Anyway, your ex is an asshole, and your friend apparently needs to stop taking liquids. ;)

Hey the man was urgent! At least he took the time to talk to you despite that!

your best friend is a beta white knight

I doubt the username has anything to do with the FML. I am guessing that person who posted this FML probably didn't create their account just for this one story. If you are an FML reader first and a FML poster second your username may not mesh to your FML.

Well what you complaining for at least he was listening to ya

Actually pee hasn't been proven to have any sort of healing ability at all. Not even for jelly stings.

"I piss on you and your problems" is the secret message of the conversation since he is your "best friend" but I guess he's just another poor guy who got friendzoned. I've gone through the exact same thing but instead of pissing, I said straight to her face "that's what you get when you go after the looks bitch." we were actually good friends but I was just pissed by standing there, offering everything she needs, supporting her all the time, while she blindly went after the ******* looks. So op, I hope you've learnt to give the nice guy a try. YDI.

lebronesque73091 12

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway

79 That'd be a bloody mess. There would be no head left only...mush >.

every1luvsboners 11

When you gotta go, you gotta go, no matter what's going on. I'm not going to piss my pants for anyone; unless you're into that sort of thing.

"Golden Showers" . One of the grossest fetishes .

I dont get how we went from pissin on the phone to pissing on each other, 38 care to explain?

BarDownDaily 12

39- They're are much most disgusting fetishes. For example: Pedophilia, ***********, Incest.

49 Well, to be fair, 38 did say ONE of the grossest fetishes.

BarDownDaily 12

60- And I was saying that is was NOT one of the grossest. And that plenty of fetishes are worse. I would rather hot a hot chick pee on me then **** a dog, a 3 year old, or my grandmother.

Dont forget 1,000 ways to die: vomit fetish

IKickPuppiesHard 16

63- Just because you want to be pissed on doesn't mean anyone else does. Other activities being more disgusting doesn't make another become acceptable.

BarDownDaily 12

74- Before you try to be a smartass why don't you ******* read the original comment that started this.

Well it could still be considered on of the grossest fetishes. Yes they are fetishes that are grosser but it can be considered to be a pretty gross fetish. Also, other than the beginning, I agree with 74. That is what my point was. Surely let's resolve this matter by saying there is a lot of gross fetishes instead of flinging flaming shit at each other.

every1luvsboners 11

I'm talking about pissing in my pants, not physically pissing on someone. If you want a golden shower I can eat some asparagus and head your way, tough guy. Baste in the urine...

IKickPuppiesHard 16

Oooooo, BURN!!! Oh wait, that was totally directed at me. Well ****. My comment still stands irregardless.

BarDownDaily 12

When did I say I want one? I said they were not as bad as some of the freakier fetishes. My God, the literacy rate of FML must be horrendous.

every1luvsboners 11

Bardown, I didn't say you wanted one, you illiterate ****. I said "if you want one." Who's the illiterate idiot now, dickstick?

BarDownDaily 12

90- "If you want a golden shower I can eat some asparagus"

BarDownDaily 12

95- YDI for playing basketball in Canada. Let's be honest, the coach was probably a Janitor as well. We are not very good at basketball, despite inventing it.

JoshTheMaggot 8

Does necrophilia count as a fetish? Cuz that would be one of the grossest as well

BarDownDaily 12

101- Forgot about that one, good call.

92- You should probably read what you just posted. To quote a quote, "IF you WANT one". Key words are everywhere. Proceed to re-read and re-read until it completely soaks in.

DocBastard-Yeah the one under the boss and the boobs FML was a lot better...

49- you forgot necrophilia ;). -shudders-

#183 What does your comment have to so with anything?

He should have aimed for the side of the toilette for a good 'ol ninja piss

95- Eskimo schools? Really? Our schools are not much different from the schools in America, so educate yourself please.

Actually the public school in Canada are much better then most of the ones in the us and have a lower drop out rate

Cat_Daniels 6

LOL I would be like "ur pissing isn't really making me feel better..."

His response "Well you talking to me about your break-up isn't helping me piss better either" or if he sticks to the one or two word rule "My bad" or "Yeah."

Yeah but it'd sure be making him feel better.

Awww, I'm sorry. Don't worry, you'll find someone knew who will be a thousand times better than that asshat. Also, your best friend.... Not the best timing, man.

Tmania_fml 1

He had to pee, what do you want him to do? Pee his pants?

Maybe he was about to pee when she called and he didn't want to hang up because she needed somebody to talk to and he couldn't hold it any longer.

menm0i 0

He Didn't want the convo to end. Multi-tasking : )

juturnaamo 29

That's what I was thinking! Who wants to say "Sorry you were dating a bastard, but I gotta piss"? Plus, he's probably hoping this'll get him laid

fattylumptard 1

Give him a break he had to listen to you bitch about nothing

8 - I hope someone breaks your heart, maybe then you'll realize OP's situation.

Nothing? Clearly you've never had a gf you've ever really cared about

GoW_Chick 14

She wasn't BITCHING you dipshit, she was seeking comfort in her best friend, because her boyfriend CHEATED on her, stop being an insensitive jerk.

Telling an idiot who does not understand a simple thing to not being an insensitive jerk, is like telling a baby to not be a baby. The only difference is that the baby will stop being a baby over time but the idiot will remain an idiot.

Fattylumptard, "bitch about nothing"?? BITCH ABOUT NOTHING?!?!!?!?1?11!!!1!!!1!1!!1,?! Her boyfriend CHEATED ON HER, in case your tiny brain can't understand: She caught her boyfriend in a relationship (or having sex) with another girl! My dad cheated on my mom (and she "practically" cheated on my dad beforw they officially divorced), I went through these situations as a second party spectator, I know where OP is coming from. You are a heartless ass-wipe, please open your mind to these situations before your ignorance post crap for you!!

Well I am sorry for what you went through A_TEEN, but seeing your parents cheating on each other and being cheated may be similar, they are different things. You do not know what OP's been going through unless it has happened to you.

You're right, sassy. They're similar situations, not that comparable than what I had in mind.

chels1994 11

This makes me somewhat suspicious that you've cheated on someone before -_-

fattylumptard 1

Clearly you are a raging feminist who has never seen a penis before.

fattylumptard 1

She is an idiot. What chick bitches to a dude about shit. That's what girlfriends are for so they can bitch to each other about shit. No dude gives a **** unless it is his girlfriend and then he has to.

There are guy's who give a ****, you moron.

chels1994 11

1) I'm a "raging feminist" because I don't think people should cheat on each other? Damn...guess I have been a raging feminist for quite some time. 2) Telling me I've never seen a penis before? Are you 12? 3) Some girls have guy friends that actually want to help and listen to them when they are depressed. You're obviously not one of these types of friends, and so what? Not everyone likes people to vent to them. I personally don't either. Even so, sometimes what seems to you like "bitching over nothing" can have a big affect on other people. But, you're probably not going to care about any of what I just said, and it's cool. Just figured I might as well state my case while I'm browsing. Have a nice day.

Captain0bv10us 0

What's wrong with that? At least he disn't hang up to take a piss.

GoW_Chick 14

I love how your comment says "disn't" :D No one mess with it! *pulls out light saber*

I would be pissed off too. (prepares for an onslaught of thumbs down) I regret nothing.