Stop
Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year-old daughter texted me from her room, "Stop." FML
Today, I was having sex with my wife when my 14 year-old daughter texted me from her room, "Stop." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I received a text from a man my wife had an affair with, in which he stated that my 18 year-old daughter is biologically his. He then sent me pictures of her that my wife had sent to him. FML
Today, I told my 13 year-old daughter that she was grounded from using her phone. Later on, I get an important call regarding a job that I have been after. After I'd picked up the phone, my daughter starts screaming, "HELP! RAPE! HELP!" on the other phone. I don't think I'll be getting the job. FML
Today, my daughter asked me when was the first time I had sex. After I told her 22 she quickly shouted, "Beat ya!" She's thirteen. FML
Today, I was having sex with a girl. She was really into it and not holding back on the noise...That is, until I received a text message from my little sister next door reading "If she is making that much noise, she is probably faking it...Trust me, I know." FML
Today, I was feeling really horny. I decided to send dirty texts to my girlfriend. I sent the first and she didn't reply, so I sent more and more and then I got one back saying 'Stay away from my little girl.' FML
Today, I caught my 20 year old daughter having sex with my best friend's husband. Apparently it's my fault for coming home early. FML
Today, my 15-year-old birth daughter asked if I've ever had sex. FML
Today, I had my girlfriend over after my wife went to work. She looked so sexy in her outfit, I couldn’t resist. I ripped her clothes off and began to do her on my couch… until I heard my daughter’s voice asking, “Dad, who’s that?” Apparently, she was home sick from school. FML
Today, I was having passionate sex with my girlfriend of nine months. She was making a lot of noise, so I told her to keep it down, and reminded her that my parents and sister downstairs. A few minutes later, I got a text from my sister, saying my parents wanted to make sure I was wearing a condom. FML
Today, I was a bit upset to learn that my 13 year-old daughter had a boyfriend. When she noticed, she assured me that I shouldn't worry, because "it's just for sex anyway". FML
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Top comments
MissFae 0
Why are you checking texts in the middle of sex? We're gonna see your wife posting here next...
Edmund_Dantes 0
"in a minute!"
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Comments (219)
kallielou 10
Everyone is saying how OP should have waited once the daughter was out of the house, but isn't it possible that it was late at night and the daughter just stayed up during the night?
mint0827 0
jackass
tiffyco 0
I pay the bills in my house and if I want to have sex then Im going to have sex. she obviously knows what it is. she knows her parents do it bc she wouldn't be there if they didn't.
NikkiGirl245 0
189 fail
MakenaSoCute 0
omg I'm 14 an I totally done that like 6394949474 times.
Isamermaid 17
That's disgusting. You wouldn't make your kid watch you have sex, so why make them listen? Just because you pay the bills and are the man of the house or whatever does not mean you shouldn't have a bit of respect for the people who HAVE to live with you.
abcdefg987 0
to all of the people saying that she is immature, just shut the hell up. if you were in your room, minding your own business, and suddenly heard your parents having sex, i dont think you would ignore it. yes, she knows her parents do it, but that DOES NOT mean she has to hear it. what else could she have done, walked into their room and said "stop" ? i dont think so.
Hgielad_720 0
Um, you totally deserved it!! I'm 14 and I hear my parents having sex all the time and it's so freaking disgustingg.
boojie97 12
hey its better than them hating eachother
stoooner420 3
i did the same thing to my parents !