Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear. I thought it was a sweet thing to do, until I saw him open a slit in its back while visiting later in the day and removing a bag of weed. He gave me a teddy bear just so he could smuggle drugs past my parents. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I told my boyfriend that I think teddy bears are THE most pointless and careless gift. He shyly gave me my birthday present afterwards. It was a carebear. FML
Today, my boyfriend gave me a teddy bear keyring. I had to explain that although many grown women like cuddly toys, I don't. And even if I did, a filthy, soaking wet bear he found in a puddle on the street is not a nice gesture, despite his suggestion I can just wash it in the machine. FML
Today, my dog found my marijuana pipe and the bag it was in and brought it to my parents. FML
Today, I finally decided to introduce my boyfriend to my parents. Surprisingly, he and my father already knew each other, so I asked him how they met. Now I know where my boyfriend gets all his weed. FML
Today, I found out that the only reason my boyfriend got a job was so that he could buy weed. FML
Today, someone thought it would be funny to steal the precious stuffed bear I've had since childhood and leave a ransom note in its place. FML
Today, I hid my weed stash in a bag from an expensive jewellery store. My sister walked into my room, went "Ooh, what's this?" and grabbed the bag. I grabbed it back and ad-libbed that it was her Christmas gift. Now I actually have to buy her expensive jewellery. FML
Today, I was at my boyfriend's house waiting for him to get out of the shower. Bored, I sent my friend a picture of myself pretending to make out with his bear rug. After the photo shoot, I looked in the doorway to find his dad staring at me. FML
Today, my boyfriend's parents found out we had a sleepover while they were on vacation. His dog had retrieved the underwear I had unknowingly left and brought them to his mom. FML
Today, my boyfriend took me to his house and introduced me to his parents. He also showed me around his bedroom. I think he forgot to remove the dartboard on his wall, taped to which was a swiss-cheesed printout of one of my Facebook photos. FML
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Top comments
SundayNightSix 23
Ingenious! If only that kind of creativity could be used for something more productive..
chocolatefrog28 29
Well, if you need a silver lining, your boyfriend is a problem solver. It's a good quality!
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Comments (68)
Credibleskills 28
Wow, he's a freaking genius lmao, but this still sucks the OP.
BMTHsuperfan 18
i wonder if the teddy bear's name was ted
buttcramp 21
well OP, sounds like a keeper!
little_one1 14
Every time I see your picture on threads I think you're my friend Ally and it makes me sad because I lost contact with her.
DocDrose 20
I'm reading all these comments. the general trend here is you should break up with him... fml relationship fixer.... lol
poshkittie 6
i saw this on ifunny a few mins ago...i dont think its too smart to be with someone who possesses drugs...especially if he brings it around your parents
JohnTheLad 13
Hopefully the opportunity for a secret compartment was merely an afterthought.
SabrinaK1 12
He's awesome
robj118 10
He has to use a teddy bear to sneak it by? Do they do a pat down when he comes over?
cuddlefishtate 2
Why didn't he just put the weed in his pocket....?
DayoRasta 8
No woman. No cry. No dope. No cry