Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML
Today, I was trying to wiggle my boxer shorts off to get it on with my girlfriend when my knee hooked on the elastic band. I was anxious to get started, so I used force and ended up kneeing my girlfriend in the crotch. FML
Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML
Today, my girlfriend came over to my house. Hoping to get a little action, I started to make out with her. Unfortunately I was wearing basketball shorts so when I got an erection, all she did was bat it back forth like a cat toy. FML
Today, me and my girlfriend were getting at it, and then my parents came home. I heard them and we scrambled to get our clothes on. My dad came into the room and found me wearing her pants inside out with her thong around my legs. FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML
Today, I bought a new bra and panties and modeled them for my boyfriend. I thought he liked them, until mid-way through feeling me up, he decided he'd rather give me a massive wedgie. FML
Today, while laying in bed with my girlfriend, I felt her grab my manhood through a layer of blankets. I got a bit stiff, just in time for her to clench tight, and pull violently. She didn't know "it" was in her hand, as she was trying to cover herself with the blanket. My manhood is now red and swollen. FML
Today, I was with my girlfriend and thought it would be cool to rip off my shirt while we were making out. It wasn't. Her bed was under a bookshelf and my shirt didn't even come off. I busted my head while she busted up laughing. FML
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Top comments
perdix 29
Violent wedgie? Isn't that the 37th Shade of Grey?
magicman13 9
That could be a turn on?Maybe?
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Comments (96)
BongRipsForJesus 7
That's why you gotta take it slow.
AKGirlinSD 20
Your comment matches your picture.
perdix 29
Violent wedgie? Isn't that the 37th Shade of Grey?
perdix 29
It's #6, the breakfast-oriented ones are first. Eggos are between Lay the Eggs and French Toast, and neither(eye) of them actually involve food. Lucky for you, the Eggo Shade actually involves Eggos.
enormouselephant 15
Perdix you are my every shade of grey.
perdix 29
#30, Aw, that's so sweet! You like my lunch-related Shades of Grey, even though I have poor table manners.
TheMathMajor 26
Wow, that's the first time I've seen you write (eye) after the word "neither" instead of (ee). Why the heck do you do that anyways, perdix?
perdix 29
#55, I've had discussions with a friend who's an (eye) sort, and I believed myself to be mostly an (ee) with an occasional (eye). I do it so I can see how often I do each and to try to find out when I use (eye) instead. I can't see a pattern yet.
Kallian_fml 21
Sadism at it's finest.
Kallian_fml 21
Damn it! It shouldn't have been 'it's'.
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
^ it was... right?
chellyX92 8
Rug burn, scratches, wedgie marks, what ever floats your boat ;) In all seriousness though, next time try a different approach like a strip tease? That way the deeds done and everyone's happy. Of course if she goes along with it.
IceColdSnow 11
Troll!!!
EagorLuvsBigFoot 8
Nothin like a good yank of the pants up the ass
joshbchillin 4
Still got laid...
spazz666 18
No, no he didn't.
roblaycle 3
You obviously suck with women!
clairelikesbears 2
You're one to talk..
SanchoClaus25 6
Flossin!!!
samasara 20
Go get her Starbucks. And say sweet things. That'll make up for it.