Today, while walking home with my girlfriend we decided to take a shortcut in the woods. After hearing a huge noise, she pushed me and ran. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I was walking with my girlfriend when she began skipping ahead of me and out in to the street. I saw a car coming right at her so I tackled her to the ground to save her. Turns out the car was stopping and was never going to hit her, and my girlfriend doesn't appreciate concussions. FML
Today, I was walking home with my boyfriend. There's a short cut to my house by jumping a fence but he insisted that we take the long way because, "Girls don't jump fences." To prove him wrong, I jumped the fence. I fell and broke my leg. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I crossed the street without holding her hand. FML
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
Today, I was driving home with my girlfriend. As we turned onto our block, she shrieked that our dog was running down the street and into traffic. I jumped out of the moving car and chased him for about a mile, only to give up, go home, and find out it wasn't our dog. FML
Today, while out hiking with my girlfriend, she thought it would be funny to push me down a small hill. It turned out there was a 16 foot drop at the end of it, and now my leg is in a cast. FML
Today, I woke up to shuffling noises coming from downstairs. Suspecting the worst, I jumped out of bed, and whispered over my shoulder for my girlfriend to stay quiet. Only after going downstairs and taking a swing in the dark with my bat did I figure out it was just my girlfriend foraging for snacks. FML
Today, I went on a hiking date with my significant other. Trying to be adventurous and assertive, I suggested we take a shortcut through the woods. We got hopelessly lost and ended up spending the night in a deserted ranger station. Turns out, my idea of adventure is not quite as romantic as it sounds. FML
Today, my girlfriend snuck up behind me to cover my eyes and play "guess who." The second her hands touched my face, I grabbed her, twisted her wrists, and kneed her to the floor out of instinct. FML
Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML
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Top comments
gm1beanzz 14
I recommend not taking shortcuts in the woods.
skippydoda 32
Rule #1 of a bear attack: You don't have to be the fastest, just not the slowest.
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Comments (74)
KittyHawkMarch 29
You have to admire this girl's survival instincts. XD
rhastafish 13
Well you now know where you stand
Willrus_3 11
You guys were trying to have sex in the woods I bet
darklordind 2
Unfortunately I did it with a friend. We were walking along the road and there was a huge screeching sound and I ran off around 10 yards away from the road. Instincts are tough to control.
inolongercare 19
Never heard the "better you than me" motto? And "I don't have to be the fastest- just faster than you"?
worldclassrager 39
She is not the type for save yourself I'll hold them back..more like I'll sacrifice you and I hope to make if out alive...
ForComments 1
How glorious would it have been if he clipped her as she took off.
dmklake 14
lol. thats funny. my bf run and left me in a similar situation.
Xobubblyxo 23
I suppose her first instinct was both fight and flight
FrostyNipz19 12
a couple to single real quick