Miscellaneous: Size matters - FML

Size matters

By MobPerfect - 11/05/2012 13:24 - United States - Providence

Today, I made my friends and family laugh by trying to put on costume glasses with a giant super-sized nose attached to them. They laughed hysterically. Not because of the gigantic nose, but because my real nose was radically bigger and the fake one wouldn't fit over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 529

You deserved it 3 560

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Same thing different taste

By farmakakis - 21/12/2009 06:25 - Australia

Today, I wore a pair of glasses with no lenses because I thought I'd look smarter. I ended up poking myself in the eye several times, leaving it swollen. So much for making me look smarter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 650

You deserved it 56 666

Masterclass

By annoym - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I spent my day creating a new type of laugh, and performing it in my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 354

You deserved it 14 256

By MJjunior - 31/08/2011 16:04 - Australia

Today, I started my first day working at a toddler day care center. At one point I decided to play "got your nose" with one of the kids. It turns out this kid has a physical birth abnormality on his face. I got his nose... his prosthetic nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 530

You deserved it 13 286

Halloween is cancelled

By iliveformystery - 31/10/2014 15:56 - United States - Oshkosh

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed as a pirate. Someone complimented me on how convincing the fake teeth were that I had on for my costume. I wasn't wearing fake teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 211

You deserved it 6 575

By jamjamy - 26/12/2008 04:53 - France

Today, at work as an optician, I gave a little girl a new pair of glasses and asked her if she could see better with them. She replied, "Oh, yeah, you've got two big zits on your nose!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 050

You deserved it 2 640

By Smile No More - 13/05/2011 12:27

Today, I was wondering why I was getting strange looks all day at work. When I got to a mirror after my shift, I noticed a booger hanging out of my nose, which was visible only when I smiled. My job involves greeting people all day with a huge smile. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 162

You deserved it 5 976

Nose job

By pignose - 05/09/2019 02:01

Today, I was babysitting for a new family. The youngest said, "Wow! You have huge nostrils!" She noticed my offended look and pushed her nose up like a pig's, saying, "It’s okay! Now I do too!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 583

You deserved it 240

By Bozo - 31/08/2012 07:57 - United States - Saukville

Today, I got a perm in an attempt to prove to my family that I'd been doing well with my life since I last saw them almost a year ago. I ended up going over for dinner looking like Bozo the Clown thanks to my idiot stylist, and my brothers wouldn't stop mocking me about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 663

You deserved it 23 910

Doofus

By Anonymous - 02/02/2025 22:00 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was talking to my crush when I laughed so hard that I snorted. Then I tried to play it cool by saying, "I do that on purpose sometimes." Now he probably thinks I fake-snort for fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73

You deserved it 512

By no more flips - 17/05/2015 14:05 - United States - Columbus

Today, I decided to impress my friends by doing a flip on the trampoline. What did impress them, was my lack of tears after I hit the edge of the trampoline and broke my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 786

You deserved it 7 060

Next

Top comments

perdix 29

Friday 11 May 2012 18:58

I know how you feel! It's the same thing that happens to me when I try to use a garbage bag as a condom;)

SkoomaKi 27

Friday 11 May 2012 18:46

I can just tell you're a nosey person! :D Shoot me now, it's for the best.

Comments

numbersystem 4

Friday 11 May 2012 20:19

:) you made your family laugh! Its a win!

santel_fml 8

Friday 11 May 2012 20:39

Get a nose job you poor thing

groupleader 7

Friday 11 May 2012 20:50

You need bigger glasses...

heelsanonymous 1

Friday 11 May 2012 20:53

That's really funny Jew know

crazyskillz122 0

Friday 11 May 2012 21:09

Wow u mad

husky22 0

Friday 11 May 2012 21:13

nose job in your near future?

Glidefedt 6

Friday 11 May 2012 21:16

Ah, De Gaulle, we meet again..

buddy565 7

Friday 11 May 2012 22:27

Well you know what a big nose means ;)

Senseless_487 29

Friday 11 May 2012 23:34

Yeah, means he can't wear novelty glasses.

theonlysweetpea 10

Friday 11 May 2012 23:52

It's ok. I have a large nose as well.

Eiregal2 10

Saturday 12 May 2012 0:09

You could be like a new best love attraction for an Eskimo lol

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You deserved it 120

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I agree, your life sucks 35 880

You deserved it 3 165

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I agree, your life sucks 41 778

You deserved it 3 328

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I agree, your life sucks 71 332

You deserved it 18 090

Today, after living in my new apartment for barely three weeks, I found mice living under my dishwasher. When I brought it up to the managers, they said I'd have to pay for an exterminator myself since they weren't there when they cleaned. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 412

You deserved it 1 431