Today, I had to kick my own father out of my house after he started attacking my wife for breastfeeding our newborn son in the living room. All the way to the door, he ranted that, "You don't see me whipping my dick out and pissing in front of everyone, do you?" FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my father is living with me because he's broke, but sometimes he has temper tantrums and calls me a son of a bitch. I can't stand to be name-called when I support him 1000%, and then we got into a violent physical fight. We both end up hurt, so I want to kick him out of my house, but I can't because he won't leave. FML
Today, my drunk dad went off on a tangent about his porn watching habits to the whole family. FML
Today, I finally had it out with my abusive father. I spent almost an hour detailing about how he constantly humiliates me in public, treats me like slime, and hits me at random when he's in a bad mood. His response was, "Quit being such a wimp" because I'm "not female." Mom took his side. I'm 16 and can't move out. FML
Today, my dad was drunk and angry, so I went to the neighbor's since I didn't know what to do. He was so nice and comforted me as I cried. Then his wife came home, called him a pedophile, beat me, and threw me out. FML
Today, I was taking a dump, when my dad shouted for me to go wash the dishes. Fed up with his constant shit, I told him to bite me. He took this as an invitation to wedge the bathroom door shut for nearly two hours, despite all my pleas and apologies. FML
Today, my mom kicked my dad out of the house and told him not to come home again. Why? I started watching some porn on my computer, forgetting I was still connected to the bluetooth speakers in the living room. My mom thought it was my dad, and I didn't have the balls to admit the truth. FML
Today, my husband decided it's completely fine to walk around the house with his penis out in front of his mom. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were fooling around when her dad burst in, proclaimed an, “Aha! I caught you you pervert!” moment and threw me out of the house. We’re in our 30s with kids, and jointly own that house. Having a father in law with Alzheimer's is great isn’t it? Just fecking great. FML
Today, I got into an argument with my dad in his hotel room. I lost my temper and stormed out onto the balcony for some fresh air, at which point he decided to lock the door behind me, trapping me there for half an hour while he watched TV. FML
Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML
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Top comments
Welshite 40
It's official: he's a complete bastard.
VengeanceChicken 12
But breastfeeding provides nourishment, whereas pissing in front of everyone provides dirty looks and makes you a recipient for a potential ass-kicking....
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Comments (277)
lagniton 7
wat an asshole she's in her own house she should feel safe there I dnt understand why he got mad its not even his house and for the love of god ppl they need to just kickback and chill out not that big of a deal geez
kwazywabbit 9
He did WHAT?!? oO SHOCKING!!!!!!
kwazywabbit 9
Men and women have breasts, most women's breasts are a more enlarged to men's but that's for breast-feeding. I personally don't see why women can't walk around topless like men do! I wonder what it was like before clothes were invented....
wvcheesehead 13
It was cold.
iamreallyesteban 2
Dang it's sad that female breasts are so sexualized that it is shamed for when they are used for their purpose of nourishing a baby.
shelbydennis 4
I'd rather see this FML than the one your wife would have written if you'd let him stay. Way to stick up for your lady!
Jaevwyn 17
Jerry Jerry!
PO_linesman 4
If Pope Francis says it's OK to breastfeed in church (he did. Google it) then it should be OK anywhere.
xNephilim 19
I'm 22 weeks pregnant and am planning on breastfeeding when my little girl gets here. My fiancé says he dares somebody to come up and say something if I end up having to breastfeed in public. Me personally, I'll tell them that if I ever see them eat a burger or anything in a public setting I will flip my shit on them just like they did with me. I'm feeding my child the food it is meant to eat and nobody will stop me from doing that wherever I want to. I think what really pisses me off about all the people who get upset over women breastfeeding in public is that they're quick to complain, but slow to provide other options. I'm pretty sure that most women would prefer to breastfeed in a more private area too, but there are NONE. If stores offered private, secluded areas, most women would probably go there to breastfeed.
AJDanko 7
Good for you (and your wife) congrats!
Tawnkat 13
I'm glad you kicked him out. That f*ckhead is so stupid, I honestly wouldn't know where to start. I would never allow him back in my home.