Today, I was drawing while on the train, when a very good-looking woman looked at my work and said, "Wow, she's pretty. Is it supposed to be me?" She'd said it in a flirty tone, but before I could stop myself, I'd said, "Nah, it's just a generic face." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was riding the train and saw a cute guy licking his lips at me. Flattered, I gave him my number when the train stopped. He looked at me and said, "Don't flatter yourself. You have mustard on your face." FML
Today, I noticed a girl looking at me on the train. Playing it cool, I decided to give her a smile and see what would happen. It came out as a creepy, seedy grin, prompting her to call security. FML
Today, I was partnered up with a girl in my art class, since the teacher had asked us to take turns drawing portraits of each other. I went first and felt pretty proud of how the drawing turned out. I showed it to her and she said "That's OK. I'm not good at drawing either." FML
Today, on the train to work, the train guard was hot and I became stupidly nervous. I'm very shy and was trying to avoid eye-contact. He said 'THANK YOU', in a pissed off tone of voice and glared at me. I had absent-mindedly been staring in the direction of his prosthetic arm the entire time. FML
Today, we were drawing self-portraits in school. I'm horrible at art, so I turned to the person next to me and stated that mine looked really ugly. He replied saying, "No, it looks exactly like you." FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, in math, I was working on an assignment and this really cute girl comes over and says my name. At this point, my heart is pumping with excitement and I'm thinking she is going to ask for my number. She said, "Did you know someone drew a penis on your back?" FML
Today, I was on the subway and saw this cute guy eyeing me. I crossed my legs, tossed back my hair, and raised my eyebrows slightly. As he came up to me, my heart started racing until he finally started flirting... with the girl next to me. FML
Today, an old woman came into my store for help. Towards the end, she asked me my name. I told her while pointing at my name tag. She then replied, "Oh! I didn't notice since I was staring at your boobs. Much prettier to look at." Sadly, this is the first time I've been hit on in months. FML
Today, I was at a restaurant, and I saw my friend. When we made eye contact, I made a creepy face at her and twitched my arms to make her laugh. A woman looked over said sadly, "Oh my God, that poor girl!" She thought I was "special." FML
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Top comments
UberNova 18
Get your foot out your mouth and say "this one doesn't compare to you", you're welcome.
sandracore 15
As an artist, this would turn me on
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Comments (128)
sandracore 15
As an artist, this would turn me on
ArielTheMermaid 17
Not an artist. But artists and theater boys are way hotter than athletes
folfg0 12
You could have so capitalized on that! Nah, it's just a generic face. But you. *look at her* your face would make beautiful art. If I had a chance to draw it, it could be one of my best drawings, if not the best.
buck33 14
20 - I don't really agree with that. I'm straight but at my school athletes are much more appealing. Male or female. All of the drama/artsy people are freaking weird (and usually unattractive). I mean, to each their own but that's how its always been out here. Nothing wrong with being drama/artist but I personally prefer athletes.
Abbeygale 8
OP - 'Nah, it's just a generic face' Pick up line of the century, well done sir.
Abbeygale 8
56 - U callin me ugly m8??? I'm kidding obviously and of course many of the people in my graphics class would be beyond weird though, so I can't even prove a point hahaa
Lennes 12
Actually 56, I am a theatre type person, and as you can no doubt tell from my profile picture, I am ridiculously attractive.
shuoq76 10
Well just to add on to the Theatre v. Athletes thing... I'm a theate girl but I personally think athletes are more attractive and not only cause many theatre guys are gay (cause at my school most are straight) but just cause lol
My_Nightmare 19
I was into theatre in high school. I agree that athletic guys are typically hotter, but. . .have a theatre guy with an amazing voice sing to you. *shudders*. It's a huge turn on
cantthinkofshit 5
The only "theatre guy" I remember from high school had downs syndrome. So honestly the only reason I remember is because everyone hated me for laughing when he tried to sing or say a line.
StayClassyLassy 6
You're a bitch #69.
StayClassyLassy 6
I meant #79.
ArielTheMermaid 17
56 I'm not saying they aren't. But personally, I think theater boys are attractive, but I also know that not everyone thinks that way. I wasn't bashing on anyone' preferences, but I apologize if it came off that way
terrible_things 1
Same :)
LLZNH 1
My highschool is an all girls school, so when the boys come over to be in theater, you can bet they are more attractive then the athletes we don't have!
UberNova 18
Get your foot out your mouth and say "this one doesn't compare to you", you're welcome.
flutter4 7
Nah, he already ruined it
hannah_lynn 12
That's brilliant!
humorizer 14
"This one doesn't compare to you" "So you callin' me ugly or somethin' are you? Well **** you, punk."
MichellinMan 20
uberhaxornova?
MyNameIsViet 15
This one doesnt compare to you....your 10 times worse. Hope he doesn't say that one either!
Llama_Face89 34
Too little too late
snusk1 2
Don't sweat it, you get it next time :)
ww2freak 6
Yeah that's what I thought
My_Nightmare 19
This reminds me of something that Daniel Tosh would say. I think I've been watching Tosh.0 waaaay too much lately. Can't help myself, though
dashizam 10
Well, she must be pretty confident to consider herself pretty, so you probably have a chance with her. And hey, at least you were honest.
Calyx_fml 22
Actually, she sounds pretty vain. Maybe you dodged a very high maintenance bullet.
cloak057_fml 8
He probably only wanted to have sex anyway
jweezy89 4
Uh, re-read the FML. Op is the guy.
sens3sfailing 25
Uh re-read the comments. They all know OP is the guy. They are talking about the girl he is talking to.
sens3sfailing 25
Uh re-read the comments. They all know OP is the guy. They are talking about the girl he is talking to.
BntyHntrSeattle 30
You should get Howard (W) to help you pick women up on trains. ;)
TBelle4Ever 15
Or Raj (K) with his non-alcoholic beer.
DerpinaFrancaise 2
Even Sheldon (C) would be helpfull, in this case !
flamegrilled123 3
Maybe Leonard (H) would be more useful
ebonyirony 29
Sheldon is a railfan.
MedKits 9
Perhaps even Penny (N/A) could help you here.
sonicgreg 12
When you get desperate you can call Amy (F).
BntyHntrSeattle 30
That was awesome; thanks TBBT fans! Once you're all bored, call Bernadette (R-W); wildebeests are known to rock parties.
Psych101 9
OP, your drawing skills are only surpassed by your quick wit.
Bekll 31
That's kind of nice though. Your idea of a generic face is considered pretty instead of plain. There's beauty in everyone.
xcarxcrashx 9
It's cute you made it deeper than it really was.
ImmaB3AST 7
So, Raj, the guy who can't talk to girls without alcohol got close to a date with a celebrity on a train and you can't even talk to a girl correctly...
007type 26
Who the **** is Raj?
I_lost_the_game 25
Either I misinterpreted 4 wrong, or this is the second Big Bang Theory reference on this FML
ImmaB3AST 7
The Howard one was a Big Bang Theory reference? He completely didn't get the girl..
LittleGreenPaola 23
It's hot in here, must be Summer.
BntyHntrSeattle 30
18- I know, but at least Howard could talk to her without a psychological malfunction :P
ebonyirony 29
42: because Howard is psychologically dysfunctional.
klovely22 13
That's just sad OP.
cameraman97 4
Was the woman sitting next to you? Then I would understand why she asked...
007type 26
Is it legal for someone as stupid as you to live?
Dixbfloppin 11
9, do I need to draw you a picture so you can understand this?
NickyK 25
"Paper can't display your beauty." Good Luck :P
LonelyLoser93 3
I think I'd try, "There is no canvas worthy of your beauty." :)