Sex and Intimacy: Manly man - FML

Manly man

By thelistman - 13/11/2009 19:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend made me shave my chest. Afterwards, she said I looked like I was 12. She won't have sex with me until it grows back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 389

You deserved it 5 141

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Same thing different taste

Shaving!

By John Doe - 07/01/2020 05:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me that if I shaved, my penis might seem bigger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 051

You deserved it 462

By JasonX0656 - 29/01/2017 06:00 - United States - Kalamazoo

Today, my fiancé asked me to do some manscaping. I got a little overzealous and now I look like a 12-year-old boy with razor burn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 711

You deserved it 1 562

Freaked out

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, I was about to have sex with my girlfriend for the first time. When I took my shirt off, she saw my chest acne. She ran out of my house and hasn't spoken to me in 5 hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 135

You deserved it 258

Cuties

By Anonymous - 07/12/2020 02:02

Spicy

Today, I shaved my penis and balls. When my girlfriend saw, she said, "You look like my little brother." He's 6 years-old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 444

By Anonymous - 25/12/2010 21:26 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend told me the reason she asked me to shave my beard. When I go down on her shaved, it feels more like her ex-boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 788

You deserved it 3 863

By Anonymous - 26/09/2010 09:26 - Vietnam

Today, I finally had the confidence to show my girlfriend my hairy chest/stomach. I'm very self conscious about it, and get embarrassed easily. She said I looked disgusting, called me Chewbacca and broke up with me on the spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 304

You deserved it 7 152

Not that into you

By Anonymous - 27/06/2023 12:00

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend won’t give me oral because she doesn't like pubes, so I trimmed them; she refused again because they felt prickly, so I waxed them. Now she says I look like a little boy. If she doesn’t want to suck cock, why won’t she just say so instead of hinting she might if I shaved? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 065

You deserved it 352

By Foxy0706 - 10/11/2015 19:27 - United States - Baton Rouge

Today, I finally told my boyfriend I have a medical condition that makes me grow an unusual amount of hair on my face, so I shave every day. He said he was leaving me because he refuses to be with a "bearded lady". FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 145

You deserved it 2 410

What should I do?

By Anonymous - 08/12/2019 20:00

Spicy

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 283

You deserved it 574

By hairless - 30/07/2010 06:45 - Australia

Spicy

Today, I got a XXX wax, because my boyfriend wouldn't go down on me as he didn't like the hair. Now he won't sleep with me at all because I look like a child with no pubic hair, and he "feels like a pedophile." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 427

You deserved it 10 119

Next

Top comments

BlackScorpionAng 0

Friday 13 November 2009 23:42

Your life is really ****** because you're pussy whipped. Your girlfriend "MADE" you shave your chest. I bet if you reach between your legs you wouldn't even feel your balls...you'd need to rummage threw her purse and find them to feel those babies now boy. And sadly, even after she "MADE" you preform for her, you still phailed... and she cut you off anyway. This is why your life is ******..it's not your naked chest, which no doubt she'll make fun of with her friends and probably her mother and then tell your friends about and never let you live down. You should reclaim your junk, pack you stuff and get the **** out before you're forced to wear her panties and bra for her amusement.

elannasdad 0

Friday 13 November 2009 23:43

Do her from behind

Comments

fringle 0

Saturday 14 November 2009 16:09

Everyone stop bitching about 12 year olds. I don't get why you hate them so much. And by the way I'm not twelve either.

chellinha93 0

Saturday 14 November 2009 20:23

All I can say is, WHAT THE HELL?

thechunkster1199 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 4:33

FYL.

jchansfan 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 12:51

Shave her head and tell her you won't have sex with her until it grows back. Even if she dumps you she's probably screwed until it does grow back! :D That advice is terrible.

thatnewyorker 0

Monday 16 November 2009 9:54

She did thst on purpose because she doesn't want to sex you xD

kukopia 0

Monday 16 November 2009 17:13

I'm betting she made him post this too. His public humiliation is all part of her owning him completely. Does she let you stand when you pee or do you lift her/your dress and sit?

XxLadyBuGxX 0

Monday 16 November 2009 21:48

aa thats wat you get for letting women handle your hair...fyl

HXCxSceneKidx 0

Tuesday 17 November 2009 12:31

Hahahaha that's why u don't take commands from a girl you pussy whipped ******

_aspidochelon_ 0

Wednesday 18 November 2009 4:51

step 1: get a wig... step 2: duct tape... Have fun!?

FuckTheHell 0

Wednesday 18 November 2009 10:20

You have a very shit girlfriend.

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The Top

Today, and for weeks now, I was sure my underwear was going missing. I found out why. My husband's brother has been stealing them whenever he visits, presumably to masturbate with. I literally caught him shoving an unwashed pair into his pocket he'd stolen from my laundry pile. Creep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 600

You deserved it 64

Today, my wife has moved into the guest room and has been giving me the cold shoulder ever since I asked for a paternity test for our kids. She swears she’s never cheated, so what’s she so offended for? Women make no sense. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170

You deserved it 1 504

The Top

Today, I was playing my guitar outside my apartment building, and some people had put some money in my guitar case. One guy threw in what I thought was a crumpled piece of paper or something. It was actually a used condom. It leaked all over the money and my case. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 353

You deserved it 5 036

Today, I faced my social anxiety and went to a chip shop on my own. I tried to have a conversation with the owner, but his thick accent made it difficult. He now knows where I live, what college I go to, and I'm pretty sure I agreed to go to India with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 421

You deserved it 8 291

Today, I fell asleep and dreamed that I had won $500,000. In my dream, I used this money to buy a new MP3 Player, and then put the rest in a term deposit. Even in my dreams, I'm the most boring person I know. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 734

You deserved it 7 967

Today, my mother-in-law pulled into our driveway like a bat out of hell, knocking down the mailbox, and nearly running over our dog who was outside. What was the rush? Hannity was gonna come on TV. My husband refuses to find this woman a home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 100

Today, I was giving my boyfriend a handjob for the first time. It took ages for him to get excited, and in the end the only thing that blew up was him, saying, "Oh my god, just stop it already." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 011

You deserved it 18 779

Today, my instructor turned up late to get me for my driving test. I soon realized something was seriously wrong. Turned out his wife left him last night, and he'd been drinking the pain away all morning. He ended up rear-ending another car, and now I have to reschedule my test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 459

You deserved it 2 616