Love: Make your mind up

Make your mind up

By FML! - 07/08/2011 00:27 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend freaked out on me because I answered her call on the first ring. According to her, it implies that I'm desperate, always horny, and just want her for the sex. Just last week she got pissed because I waited three rings to answer. Apparently that means I'm cheating on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 683

You deserved it 6 587

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

Oooooh yeah

By omgwtf - 01/06/2019 04:00

Today, I found out my girlfriend had changed my ringtone to some woman moaning with pleasure continuously. I found this out in the middle of a job interview when she rang me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 883

You deserved it 567

Am I the asshole?

By Anon - 22/05/2023 22:00

Today, I fucked up when I answered a phone call. I wasn't sure who the number was at first, and it turned out to be my ex girlfriend who had apparently been stalking me. She asked me how my new girlfriend was, and as I answered it in front of my girlfriend, she's now depressed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 650

You deserved it 227

By skmusic - 09/04/2009 05:04 - Canada

Today, the phone rang so I went to answer it. No one was there. A minute later the phone rang again and no one answered so I assumed it was a telemarketer or a prank so I started swearing uncontrollably in rage. Turns out it was my crush calling to ask me out, but she was too nervous to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 284

You deserved it 75 103

By jailbirdlove - 11/10/2010 01:38 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were making love. Her phone rang, and she stopped to answer it. It was her ex-boyfriend, calling her from jail. She talked to him for 15 minutes. To top it all off, before she hung up, I heard her tell him she loved him, and couldn't wait for him to get out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 779

You deserved it 4 286

Phone-blocked

By unamyous - 08/06/2012 13:26 - United States - Canoga Park

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot in the bedroom. Her phone rang and she stopped to have an hour long conversation with her ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 640

You deserved it 4 156

By hopeless - 14/02/2015 20:04 - Canada - Halifax

Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 739

You deserved it 2 882

Overbearing parents are the worst

By SoDead - 05/12/2020 04:01 - United States - Center Point

Today, my mother, who thinks I'm a virgin, called me while I was having sex with my boyfriend. I have to answer every time she calls or she freaks out. I ended the conversation quickly and hung up. Or so I thought. She listened in to the rest of our 20-minute lovemaking session, and I have some explaining to do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 792

You deserved it 1 708

What do you want from me?

By Anonymous - 16/09/2023 22:00

Today, after weeks of my girlfriend moaning that I never go anywhere, I went out with some friends. An hour in, she started blowing up my phone. When I answered it, she was screaming in rage because I wasn't home to cook dinner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 787

You deserved it 114

By lovegotmehung - 29/10/2010 04:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was on the phone with my girlfriend. Just as she said "I love you", the credit on my phone runs out. She now thinks that I've purposely hung up on her. She refuses to speak to me until I tell her the real reason I hung up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 918

You deserved it 3 899

By Alex - 31/03/2009 04:41 - United States

Today, my girlfriend told me how I am too occupied with work for our relationship. Before we had sex I told my friend to call me in ten minutes so I can pretend its my boss and I would throw the phone away to impress her. He called me in ten minutes, but I only lasted five. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 753

You deserved it 89 069

kleider1 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:07

Dude. I think she has trust issues

ChickenInMyKitch 4

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:10

You gotta wait for that second ring brah

Comments

LizzJizz 16

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:34

Ugh, sounds..Clingy..

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:35

Sounds like an angry feminist to me.., or she's just a bitch. Then again what's the difference?

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:40

Away with you troll. Go watch glee, or whatever trolls watch these days.

BelleBelle_fml 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:48

Seriously. He just accused me of trolling too. But I don't take it seriously. No need to get offended by his lame comments and sad excuse of a person.

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:56

Haha you "real men", cause I'm the one that tells people to off themselves over the Internet like I'm a "real man." Your idea of real men must be vacuous. I'm not going to continue arguing pointlessly over this status with you. When you can discourse something like a civil human being, then I will consider you worth my time.

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 10:48

Before this continuous to the pointless void that this will end up at, 1. Belle my IPhone somehow posted that on your status even though i replied to Shrike's first comment, and I already apologized for that happening. 2. Shriek I should have been more clear on this but my status was for radical feminists who think men are not equal, and everything they do is wrong, and offensive, and think women should be superior, and men inferior and not equal.. It was not for feminists who fight for the rights of equality because I firmly believe in human equality regardless of gender. I should have been more clear on that detail.

Azu_nyan 8

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:35

Obviously you should answer on the second ring.

rockstar1400 5

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:36

Apparently, its time for a new girlfriend!

androiddestroya 7

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:36

not worth your time op

BelleBelle_fml 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:37

Well get it right dude! Nah, in all seriousness, your girlfriend is a nut case. Break up with her but let her down gently, don't want to have to end up getting a restraining order or maybe even moving to another country and changing your name and getting plastic surgery.

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:38

Go away troll, I have no more food.

OrgasmicBunnies 9

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:47

Ugh, this somehow got posted on this status instead of mine. Sorry pedestrian.

BelleBelle_fml 11

Sunday 7 August 2011 10:07

Ahh a troll who cannot even troll correctly, how precious.

dallasbracken 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:42

She be cheating. Been there.

SaRaBby786 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:43

Jnjii

SaRaBby786 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:43

SaRaBby786 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 9:44

im the same way Were just scared and really like the guy.. no need to go all "fml" on her

Just_Peed 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 11:48

Birds of a feather:) FLY TO PSYCHO TOWN.

VeganVampyre 26

Monday 8 August 2011 3:45

Yes... but... don't you think that's a just a little excessive, to decide that the length of time he takes to answer the phone means he's either clingy or cheating, as opposed to right next to it or too busy to pick up right away?