Today, I was walking out of the train station when an old man grabbed me. I started screaming, yelling, "HELP" like a madwoman and tried pushing him away - that's when I saw the golf cart rush past me. He was trying to push me aside from getting run over. Everyone started laughing. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, an old lady fell in the street, and I rushed to help her. As I tried to help her to her feet, she started screaming, "She pushed me! She pushed me!" I froze up in shock, and ended up being chased by some guy who thought I'd attacked her. FML
Today, I shouted, "Fuck off!" out of reflex when I felt someone behind me grab my bag and pull it off my shoulder. It turned out to be an elderly man with a walking stick, who was trying to steady himself in a busy crowd. FML
Today, I ran for the train that was about to leave. I tried to hold the doors open with my leg and got stuck. The conductor just yelled out how unbelievable and ridiculous I was and waited 2 minutes to finally release me. Everyone was laughing at me. FML
Today, I was at the supermarket when I saw an elderly lady slip on a wet patch of floor. I ran over to help, and I almost fell too before steadying myself. Then some pimply cockmunch of a teen decided to kick my legs out from under me and walk away while laughing his balls off. FML
Today, I was grocery shopping, when an elderly lady walked up to me and tripped over her own feet. I caught her by the arm, at which point she shrieked at me for "groping" her. She ended up smirking as security threw me out of the store. FML
Today, I was on the train next to an elderly woman. When I told her it was my stop, she turned her knees towards the aisle, and I, thinking that she was letting me go by, began to edge past. She screamed, "DON'T PUSH ME!" and the whole train turned to look. I was thus the asshole pushing the old lady. FML
Today, a guy grabbed my ass at the mall. I whirled around and went to sock him. He ducked and I accidentally hit the elderly woman standing behind him in the face. To say all hell broke loose would be an understatement. FML
Today, while playing golf on a local course, my idiot of a friend decided to push his pushcart down a massive hill towards me. When he realized that I was going to be hit, he screamed for me to move, but it was too late. I collapsed to the ground in pain, all while he chuckled about the situation. FML
Today, I was yelled at by a bunch of angry people because I couldn't physically move out of the way while 10 more tried to force their way onto a subway in Shanghai. Then one old lady started hitting me with her purse to get me to move even more. FML
Today, I was coming home from work and saw an old couple overwhelmed by the number of people at the train station. It was peak hour and I decided to help them. As I went up to them, they said, "Get away, go mug someone else". FML
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Top comments
1Tsk 0
always trust old people grabbing you
Coffee_Kaioken 0
For once, I actually love the first comment that was made on a new post.
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Comments (91)
meyou_fml 0
What is a golf cart doing on a sidewalk?
Thoricsteam20 24
Yeah
24788 7
#11 Rent a cops usually drive around in golf carts. It's a modified one, but it's still a golf cart.
Thoricsteam20 24
*Rainbow appears* "The more you know"
mudkipsan 19
inb4 100 comments about how she could have been raped
LilKonvicted 0
Not everybody wants to rape you. A HUGE YDI
Kamazar 0
Ignoring the fact that you couldn't see a golf cart speeding your way, you can't defend yourself against an old man? Go to the gym, women! No wonder no one wants to rape you (ok, weird wording...)
greenyme 0
haaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa awesome!!!! so you think your life is ****** now? ;)
evilralphwiggum 0
The question is. Were the people in the golf cart looking for a golf ball? ^_^
Ae_hunt 0
Yet another FML about a pig who thinks the whole world is out to rape her... Don't flatter yourself so much. Next time someone touches you I would recommend showing some appreciation instead of flipping out like the headcase I'm sure you are.
lenajoy927 0
it wasn't that much of an overreaction, being grabbed suddenly like that would be scary. just be glad you didn't get hit by the golf cart! then your life would really be f'd.
ohhhhshizzz 0
Who said she thought she was being raped, if the guy had mugged her you would all be on here saying how you should beware of your settings. Gosh you guys are so damn stupid.