Today, I had a quicky with my boyfriend, because his dad was about to pick him up. Afterwards, I texted, "Nice to meet your dad, I hope we didn't look too horny." A few minutes later, he replied, "Great timing, he was holding my phone." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, as I was driving my dad home, I got a text message. My dad, who doesn't want me texting while I'm driving, decided to read the text message to me. He began to repeat a message from my boyfriend recounting the amazing sex we had the night before. FML
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend when my dad pulled up to pick me up from his house. My dad beeped his horn and my boyfriend opened his bedroom curtain, knocked on the window, and waved. While he was still inside of me. FML
Today, I was using my dad's cell because I had broken mine. I was texting my boyfriend all day when my dad needed his phone back. I forgot to tell my boyfriend that my dad would be using the phone. My boyfriend then texted graphically what he wanted to do to my dad. FML
Today, while on the train with my dad, my boyfriend sent me a message. It was a nude, and when I looked, my dad saw. FML
Today, my boyfriend was dropping me off home and we were still in the car. When I went in to give him a hug, my hand hit his shoulder and I dropped my phone at his feet. Just as I pulled back up with it, my dad was staring at us from outside. He still appears to think I was giving him head. FML
Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML
Today, my dad was in town for a day. We only had about 3 hours to do something so we left right away. Right as we were about to leave my dad's slutty girlfriend came by for a "surprise visit". My dad told me he would be right back. They had sex for 2 hours and 45 minutes. In total, we talked for 15 minutes. FML
Today, my boyfriend was over. I asked my dad how long until dinner was ready, his reply was, "Five minutes, so no, you can't go upstairs for a quickie". FML
Today, my boyfriend called my cell. I picked up and said, "Hi, this is Lisa and I want you to fuck me raw." It was my dad. He was at my boyfriend's parents' house and forgot his phone. FML
Today, my dad came round to the house. Looking rather pleased with himself he pulled out his phone, grinned, and chucked it over to me. I glanced at the screen to see a naked woman. He smiled and said "I tapped that last night". FML
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Top comments
angrymexican 8
In your boyfriends case, doesn't matter, had sex
GreenAppleDP 0
And this is why it's good to lock your phone with a pass code. That's entirely too awkward.
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Comments (180)
kookysoc 11
Im confused
aaazafina 4
I simply pity you...............but I cant stop laughing XDD
drpepperismylove 2
kids lol
beezleboss2010 3
Awesome
mikimoo 0
done that b4 ;) ooopppps
whodatgirl12 2
If you have to hurry to have sex before your dad picks you up, more than likely ... You are to young to he having sex
thebitchritenow 0
I agree
claudia1794 1
You should have waited longer and then called instead of texting. No one would know except the both of you. Lol.
misshighjinks 5
"heated" could mean alot of things, make up a good excuse!
midnight21 8
You deserve it for having a "quicky". Sex shouldn't have anything to do with the word quick you idiot.
militarybrat 21
Thats happened to me b4. But if it read like that, and ur bf didnt make a big deal, he could have just lied and said it was something else? Even something as simple as "we were making out". FML still