Today, I met a hot guy at the club. We danced and had a really good time, so I invited him home with me for the night. The next morning, I awoke to the sound of what I thought to be running water. I looked up to find him, naked, and pissing into my air conditioner unit. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, after sleeping with a guy I met at a party, I woke up to find him peeing in the corner of my room on my roommate's carpet. FML
Today, I was at a local club with my friends sitting at a table when some guys approached us. One of them started telling me about his recent adventures through Europe and was very interesting. Something warm hit my leg and I realized the guy was urinating on me. FML
Today, I met a really attractive guy outside of a club. We came back to my apartment and had sex. Afterward, we both fell asleep. I woke up and found 20 dollars on my nightstand that wasn't there before. He thought I was a prostitute, and apparently a cheap one. FML
Today, after taking a guy home and getting frisky, he woke up in the middle of the night, got out of bed, and peed on my desk. That's 2 years of uni work and my laptop soaked through. FML
Today, when I came home, my girlfriend was in sexy lingerie, and said it was a surprise for me. Sounds awesome, right? Too bad she was drenched in sweat and the room smelled like sex. I looked in the closet, only to get punched in the face by a naked guy. FML
Today, I finally got to hook up with this hot guy I'd been talking to for a few weeks. To my surprise, he was sinfully drunk when he arrived. As we were going at it, he shat on my white carpet. Now the phrase "f***ing the shit out of someone" has a brand new meaning for me. FML
Today, my kids did not tell me the AC guy was here. I got up and went to the restroom in my bra and underwear, and the AC guy was standing in the bathroom. Our AC unit is downstairs, so both me and the AC guy were shocked. FML
Today, I let my boyfriend sleep over at my house for the first time. Upon arriving, he tossed his stuff on the floor and said "I gotta take a piss, where's your shower?" FML
Today, I woke up, completely naked, in bed with a guy I met the night before. We were both drunk the night before and I had agreed to go home with him. The reason I woke up was that someone was knocking on his bedroom door. Turns out he lives with his mom and she made us pancakes. FML
Today, as I arrived at my house after a two week holiday, I opened the door and heard footsteps upstairs. I went up and found my boyfriend naked in bed. We had great sex. Afterwards I found my best friend naked in the wardrobe. Turns out they'd also had great sex. FML
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Top comments
Helldozer 0
YDI for bringing random people into your apartment, *****.
breakthesky 0
Haha um...
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Comments (160)
jenned_fml 0
Do you people not realize that you are just posting the same two things over and over again? She is a ****, or isn't. No one is taking a tally here. That's what voting is for.
midwintermist 0
"Wow, you people are all in convents, aren't you? How dare anybody ever have a one-night stand, right? Pathetic. Grow the **** up." Agree with this comment. Maybe next time you wanna have a one night stand, go to their house, not yours.
monkey314159 0
Femnazis unite! Also, I want sex too, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna find a strange girl that I know nothing about and sleep with her.
Damndamn_fml 0
LOL THATS ******* AWESOME!
AlreadyExistsTH 1
WTF!? nasty!
Miz_Firebrand 3
Ewwww! Hope you can get the smell out!
vas_123 0
why wud he do that ?
lolperson 0
um.. why'd he do that?
acb123 0
okay i agree with #22, but then again if it is not right to call a girl that brings a random stranger home from clubs every night and ***** them, a ****.. then who is considered a ****?
SgtSchadenfreude 0
YDI, because you shouldn't invite people into your home if you only met them recently (let alone that very day). It's because of people behaving naively and irresponsibly like this that Ted Bundy was able to kill 35 women in the span of five years.