Today, the man sitting next to me on the train looked like he was about to be sick. I quickly handed him the nearest bag I could find, a bag full of my lunch for that day. Safe to say he held nothing back. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while riding the bus to a really important job interview the child sitting next to me threw up in my lap. His mother then told him to wipe his mouth. He used my sleeve. FML
Today, I was on a train when I felt the unsettling urge to vomit. I ran to the toilet, but there was someone in there, with another waiting in the corridor. Out of time, and luck, I projectile-vomited into a bin built into the wall. The man waiting for the toilet looked truly traumatised. FML
Today, I was sitting on the train wondering what that putrid smell was. As I got off the train I realized there was vomit all over the back of my seat. FML
Today, I took the train home. When seated, I suddenly noticed something wet on my seat. Without looking, I thought it was water since it was snowing outside. Guess again. It was vomit. FML
Today, the man sitting next to me on the train tried to sneak a dead cat into my bag while I was sleeping. FML
Today, while riding the bus, the person next to me broke into a coughing fit. Fortunately, he covered his mouth. Unfortunately, he used my arm. FML
Today, I threw up on the subway. Luckily, because I hadn’t eaten all week, it was just the seven pints of beer I'd had previously chugged. FML
Today, I was on an early flight home after a night of drinking. I was sat in my seat when I started feeling sweaty and nauseous. I grabbed the puke bag and started gagging, then puking, and a really loud fart came out. Everyone heard it. The attendant switched me seat to sit alone. FML
Today, on a train, I nearly choked while sleeping with my mouth wide open. The little old lady sitting opposite me was entertaining herself by throwing little pieces of balled-up tin foil into my mouth. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
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Top comments
sa5v 21
Even though he puked on your lunch, it was a nice thing to do op!
makkarari 18
Better to have no lunch than to be covered in vomit!
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Comments (38)
makkarari 18
Better to have no lunch than to be covered in vomit!
Replyka 17
I'm hoping you meant "than"
makkarari 18
Ya sure...
Techno101 13
When she just doesn't get grammar lol
makkarari 18
Oh I 'get' grammar. Just sick and tired of people nitpicking every little mistake people make!
higgysaurus 18
Except those two sentences are very different. "Then to be covered in vomit" means you got no lunch and somebody puked on you afterwards which would be a lot worse than this FML.
makkarari 18
Well by the time I realized my mistake I was no longer able to correct it. But I'm sure people understand what I was getting at
9a_1z 12
Usually I hate the grammar nitpickers too, but that one was kinda funny.
sa5v 21
Even though he puked on your lunch, it was a nice thing to do op!
Feklfekl2222 32
It's better to have to buy lunch than be covered in vomit, and he will no doubt be incredibly grateful
Nilorak 24
Oh throw up you can buy new food.
kyrisonfusion 22
Very nice of you, you're very empathetic. Sorry about your lunch
Tripartita 45
It's sort of romantic—you guys both lost your food at the same time.
shay_serendipity 29
This could be the gross start to a beautiful romance
hellnosucka 27
I hope you didn't eat your lunch anyways.
donuts678 25
YDI for being so absent-minded but you are still a good person.
Lalala579121 28
At least OP didn't grab someone else's bag.
LilMissCanadian 22
Despite the fact you may have had to buy your lunch, it was very kind of you to do that. :)
HollyQuinn 21
How kind of you! I'd have probably moved...