Today, my mum gave me half-raw chicken for dinner. After she refused to cook it again, I threw it away saying that I didn't want to get salmonella. She told to be more grateful, and that I was an idiot for trying to use salmonella as an excuse because, "It's chicken, not salmon." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I found out that my boyfriend's mom doesn't believe you can get food poisoning from food that is cooked. She gave us food that had sat out all day/night and then got angry when I said we could get sick. FML
Today, I felt sick to my stomach, so I told my mother I didn't want to eat dinner. She started accusing me of being anorexic, so I ate a little bit anyway to make her stop. I then threw up, only for her to take it as confirmation that I have an eating disorder. FML
Today, my mother called me a "wasteful child" because I threw up my lunch. FML
Today, my stupid drunk dad was yelling for food and since my mum needed to finish her taxes before midnight, I told him to STFU and passed him prawn fried rice, which he told me to shove up my ass. I threw it in the bin, since he's the only meat eater in the family. When she'd finished, she yelled at me instead of him. FML
Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML
Today, I woke up late and in a rush, I grabbed what I thought was a container of leftover spaghetti from the refrigerator to take to work. At lunch, I opened it to find it wasn't spaghetti, but raw marinated chicken my roommate had prepped for dinner. I ended up eating a vending machine sandwich that tasted like cardboard. FML
Today, my parents told me not to make plans for dinner as they were bringing it home. Normally, that would be great but they brought home slop from some buffet that had just opened. Everything was greasy, too salty, or bland. I told them they could have it, and made my own dinner. Now I'm being called, "The Food Network critic." FML
Today, my mom and I had an argument about my laziness. We did this as I was eating uncooked rice because I didn't want to have to walk to the kitchen and put it into the microwave. FML
Today, my girlfriend screamed at me for throwing away her food, calling me a sick, controlling psycho. When I pointed out that the seafood pasta I tossed was a week old and almost certainly rotten, she dug the box out of the trash and ate it to prove a point. Now she's got food poisoning and somehow it's my fault. FML
Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML
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Top comments
evaki1 12
You should have said 'I meant chicken pox!'
Michyxo 14
Well, you probably should have cooked it again yourself rather than throw it away, but fyl, that's disgusting.
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Comments (221)
Iknoweverything 29
Re-cook it yourself? It's not that hard, you just stick it back in the oven, or even just nuke it until you smell something burning!
NyxTheShade 8
Nuke it?
zaveeshaveesh3 7
Well no one wants chickenella
RedPillSucks 33
but everyone wants barbarella
maz_irken 6
I could go for some nutella
yomommma 6
I Need An Umbrella
ItsTheKing 10
Everyones favorite twilight character is bella.
stolencookie 17
You just killed the humor with your stupid twilight reference...
Alishaandphil42 6
You should've just cooked the fukkin thing, damn, your mom shouldn't even have to cook dinner for such an ungrateful brat like you.
Malinkrot 3
are you angry because your parents neglect you and wont get you the psychiatric help you desperately need?
KittyKatGirl 15
If anything like my grandmother, might believe, only she can cook things properly, if it was my grandmother, would actually have a go at me if I tried to cook it myself, she seems convinced only she knows how to cook.
Jaxx66 21
Don't be angry. When I'm at my moms house (and growing up) she made a point of 'this is my kitchen. Keep OUT' now I wouldn't of thrown it away. But I'd of nommed the other stuff on the plate :p
THE_A_TEEN 28
Awwww was someone not loved when they were a kid. seriously you sir, are a total asshole, see that gun right there, please SHOOT YOURSELF BTW, the mom was being a total prick, uncooked foods , or half raw food pose a danger to anyone with thw chance of catching food bourn illnesses, and judging by the actions by the mom, she wont take the op to the hospital if that happens
Carriiee_fml 3
If You Eat Raw Chicken You Can Die! You Dumbass!!
sylverdrag_fml 9
You need psychiatric "help" just about as much as you need a bullet in your brain. And yes, the OP is a bitch. Throwing food because she doesn't like the way her mom cooked it? Is that considered acceptable where you're from? And no, her mom's ignorance of that particular subject is no reason to be a bitch.
alycion 39
A generation or two ago things were done with food that would make us cringe. While my mom is careful she always says well it didn't kill us or make us sick. Cracks me up because I see that view among many her age. Some of which haven't bothered to keep up with food safety. Though myself, if I get something undercooked and I'm not at a restaurant I wouldn't think twice of tossing it in the oven myself instead of tossing it out.
Bacontree 14
Your mom's reaction made me giggle.
ltsune 3
Oh dear. That's one owned mom!
stormchaser24 24
Hmm COOK IT YOURSELF. But what a waste of a good chicken.
lolfish1337 4
Your mother is right, it's chicken, you would get chickenella.
ohmandapants 17
Naw, naw you get chickenella from salmon.
1badws6 0
Dó you have no sense of humor?
ohmandapants 17
Who me?
VasilisaUzhasnaj 29
I assume your mother thinks chickens are mammals too?
poohforMVP 4
There not !?
sammsaballerr 1
all the old ppl keeep saying ur ungreatful. lol id do the same thing. if shes gonna make my food half assed and nasty im gonna throw it away and make like ramen or something. and facepalm for the salmonilla thing, lmao
Carian01 0
...You are too stupid for words.
jvillan87 5
My head hurts...
Citylights_ 0
So... You would waste chicken that'd perfectly edible if you got off your lazy ass and recooked it? I see...
sleepingparrot 7
Aha. "the old people" - you mean the people who have an understanding of life beyond their own egomaniacal little world? Way to show just how young and immature you are (to which you respond with something like " **** you, you're gay") go without food for a couple days and see how likely you are to throw something away rather than simply re- cooking it.
jokolopolop 0
Chill the **** out...
taradeborde87 3
#25, you are *almost* too dumb for words. But I'll try anyway.. Why don't you get off your lazy ass and do it yourself the first time? You're obviously old enough. Instead of being a bitch and expecting your mom to do it, stop being such a child, grow the **** up and quit being a spoiled brat.
ImTheAlpha 30
Umm... My brain really hurts.