He's got the moves

By beccav23 - 25/10/2011 16:08 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to viciously rip off my thong. My ass crack is numb. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 355
You deserved it 7 471

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Top comments

Blackmail111 9

He's climbin in yo windows..snatchin yo people up

Hmm i wonder why he wanted your ass crack numb....


hahaha ass crack

HowAreYouToday 34

It's an atomic wedgie

KronikSplakkn 4

"love hurts" "No no. Love makes my asscrack numb"

Blackmail111 9

Your boyfriends an "ass" I think you should take a "crack" at finding a new one. There's a "whole(hole)" bunch of dating sites 'but(Butt)" don't worry you'll find someone else

Thank you (# 20) for pointing (out) your "play" of words otherwise we cunt UNDERstand what [yo]u wanted to say

DanGleesak 11

Put Oragel on his toilet paper so he has a numb ass crack.

41 - putting hot sauce on his toilet paper would work too. :P

Mean_Mr_Mustard 9

52- I think he would notice hot sauce on his ass tissue.

phoenixslayer69 4

So numb ass + butt sex = good time had by all.

14- Love hurts? Not enough lube.

20 you aren't funny, you tried way to hard.

Next time ....edible thong...

adam_mylife 3

This actually made me laugh lol

FMLandurstoo 9

Lemme guess. It wasn't the the thong that made it numb. :D

22cute 17

You need to get away and STAY away from any guy who is that violent or just rough & careless.

is your thong alright?

Well technically there was no ouch her ass went numb, bet she even let her boyfriend do anal since she couldn't feel anything? :D he thought it through

Blackmail111 9

He's climbin in yo windows..snatchin yo people up

Hide yo wife, hide yo children!

Blackmail111 9

No no no no no It's "Hide yo kids,hide yo wife and hide yo husband cause they rapin erbody out there"

Damn I fucked that one up!

you dont have to come and confess we lookin for you!

Hahaha!!! He's rapin' people up in here!

we're gonna find yo! we're gonna find yo!

Lily_lops95 0

And some WAffle fries...with some..with some Coke or somethin..

We got your t shirt You left fingerprints and all You are so dumb you are really dumb For reals The man got away leaving behind evedance I was a attacked by some idiot in the projects So dumb so dumb so "ALL TOGATHER NOW"

elilucas55 0


I seen the local news on that before it became famous!

Great, now I gotta go to my YouTube favs and watch it again. Song's gunna be stuck in my head all night.

ukrage 1

You mean he's climbin in yo snatch rippin yo panties up

blackheart24 10

I love that song. Plus the dude in it looks like he like he just got done rockin a large bowl of white widow :)

bout 5'9 5'10, coffee complexion, low cut like a ceaser, with some little waves in his hair, smooth skin, very smooth face, seeing my sister, when i walked in, he had his arms around her neck. first thing to do, was to pull him off of her... and that's what i did :D

rofl. Did they ever find the guy?

so run and tell that run and tell that run and tell that homeboy home home home boy

Hmm i wonder why he wanted your ass crack numb....

Brice28_fml 10

Sounds like a fun night!

4- to make it easier going in

flockz 19

no no no *clears throat* the boyfriend wanted her ass numb because he was planning on taking her to a picnic in the middle of an enchanted forest by horseback. this is where he was going to propose. but since his little pansy ass was going to inevitably get rejected, he instead hired a hoard of forest creatures that he planned on slaying one by one in front of her to show his love. this would impress op so much that she would HAVE to say yes! but what he did not expect was i, the great flockz of FMLtopia, will foil his plans! i will kidnap his soon to be wife and marry her myself!! hahaha *exhales* ya that's some gooooood shiiit.

GwarKitty 5


Or #45...

flockz 19

haha haters gonna hate.

Surprise butt sex. Mmm mmm

Sure, it was the thing that made it ass numb ;)

Ginkle45 1

Great time to try, you know, goin in the back enterance?

avatar0810 15

Wedgie fetish?

Every guy has a fetish, maybe her ass is the most attractive part about her, heck I would of done it

yesio12 13

He likes that kinky sh!t

KiddNYC1O 20

Do you, 7? Call me.

yesio12 13

Depende 44. Tengo mis limetes ; )

yesio12 13

But if you really wanna find out. You can ask my boyfriend.

danny0094 0


I'll ask ur Bf for him, what's his number? ;)

Takes the term "butt floss" to a whole new level

im guessing things quickly cooled down after that.

CWright1994 0

I would message you, but my send message button is no longer "findable."

Hey Claire

that just sucks ass..

every1luvsboners 11

I really can't blame the man, thongs anger me also. They're just another obstacle in the way of the prize.