Freudian

By giantblueballsthesizeofjohnnysinscock - 19/12/2014 23:14 - United States - Colorado Springs

Spicy
Today, after six long, hard years of involuntary celibacy, I was finally about to get laid. Except it was just a dream, and in it my mom stormed in just as things got heated, called me a useless cunt, and told me to go do my chores. I guess my brain forgot I moved out years ago. FML
I agree, your life sucks 37 110
You deserved it 4 650
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Top comments

dudeman1212 22

Mom's a cockblock even in your dreams. Better stock up on Vaseline, I guess

155 3
TiiBags 15

Sometimes you don't even have your own brain on your side...

76 7

Comments

So_Uncool123 0

If you didn't think you were owed sex, you'd probably have more luck.

4 5
lalaney 14

Oh come on. That was unjustified. There is no misogyny here, he's no Isla Vista killer. Look, I'm a chick, but if I'm celibate for longer than 6 months, I start to lose it. I'm not owed sex, but it still sucks.

5 3
badgemaster 13

Sorry bruh.... Im sure ur a knock out... Chin up it will be alright

0 3
okay17 7

No offense OP, but it's not that hard to find someone and hookup with them. Even if you look bad, which we don't know if you are or not. But if you need, go online or use an app. You'd find someone who is willing to sleep with you, even if there is no emotional connection.

1 6
BradTheBrony 19

Hehehehehe, long and hard...

1 0
lifesucksvitae 10

"Involuntary" celibacy doesn't exist; it's an oxymoron. Celibacy by definition is CHOOSING aka voluntarily not having sex. Why is it so hard just to say that you "haven't had sex" for the last six years? Saying that you're "involuntarily" celibate makes it sound like you're blaming someone else for your lack of sexual encounters. And if you ARE blaming someone else, then that's sort of taking away someone else's right to choose.. Which put in the same fashion might as well be called, "involuntarily non-celibate".

2 0
ShenaniganNinja 20

I think you're reading into this far too much. I don't see how it's OP blaming anyone. Seems like you're tripping over yourself to find something offensive about OP's post.

0 2
BrainStew27 12

sounds like the years weren't the only thing that was "long and hard"

0 0
MightyThoth 7

at least you weren't eating your mom out in the dream. that would've been worse

0 0