Love, Health and Gross: Fingered

Fingered

By Anonymous - 28/08/2022 12:00 - Egypt

Today, I discovered that my husband doesn't wash his hands after using the toilet. Too bad I got to found out after three years of marriage, and while his finger was in my mouth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 153

You deserved it 191

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Same thing different taste

First class slob

By Anonymous - 11/12/2023 05:00 - United States

Today, I overheard my husband admitting that he doesn’t wash his hands after having diarrhea. I had no prior knowledge of this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 96

By msjustine - 06/05/2011 19:27 - United States

Today, I discovered that my boyfriend, the one who does all the cooking in the house, doesn't wash his hands after using the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 944

You deserved it 13 363

By blushingbride - 09/02/2014 21:59 - United States - Alpharetta

Today, my husband decided to pick his nose out before he would kiss me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 363

You deserved it 4 442

By Anonymous - 17/07/2011 00:17 - Israel

Today, my husband told me that he never washes his hands after using the bathroom because he thinks it's only for "paranoid people". FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 421

You deserved it 3 722

Classic Dave

By Sarahir - 29/04/2020 05:00

Today, I walked in on my husband masturbating into the kitchen sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 187

You deserved it 390

By Cheyenne - 11/07/2010 06:06 - United States

Today, I found out I'm the only one in my family to wash their hands after they use the bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 302

You deserved it 3 700

Gross idea

By Anonymous - 09/03/2012 00:30 - Canada

Today, my husband and I got into a fight because I refused to let him use my fingernail to clean the plaque off his teeth. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 819

You deserved it 2 951

By Toothy - 02/04/2011 05:03 - United States

Today, I learned that when I leave skid marks in the toilet my wife uses my toothbrush to remove them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 978

You deserved it 50 036

Sharing is caring

By Anonymous - 24/06/2020 20:08

Today, when he came back to bed, I asked my flatmate who I've been sleeping since the start of lockdown, whether he had washed his hands after going to pee. He said he barely touched his dick, so he didn't need to. He likes putting his fingers in my mouth when we have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 655

You deserved it 697

By I_Has_A_Fishy - 10/07/2012 19:33 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, I heard a blood-curdling scream from the bathroom. I discovered my husband, naked and with his pants around his ankles, standing in the bathtub and pointing at a cockroach on the ground. After disposing of the body, I had to stay and comfort him while he wiped his ass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 677

You deserved it 3 452

Hangryko 29

Sunday 28 August 2022 21:56

Tell him to wash his hands *with soap* from now on or he's never touching you again.

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 28 August 2022 14:09

Sounds like a ... ... wait on it ... ... shitty situation! Yeeeeeoooowww!!!!!

Comments

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 28 August 2022 14:09

Sounds like a ... ... wait on it ... ... shitty situation! Yeeeeeoooowww!!!!!

Hangryko 29

Sunday 28 August 2022 21:56

Tell him to wash his hands *with soap* from now on or he's never touching you again.

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The Top

Today, my daughter got her first period, so I went and got some products for her, certain that I knew what was needed. The lady cashier took one look in my basket and sympathetically asked if it was my daughter's first period and if I wanted help, since I clearly had no idea what I was doing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 070

You deserved it 222

Today, I was at the hairdresser's getting a trim. The lady doing my hair commented on how beautiful and luscious my hair was, which made me feel really good. I later overheard her telling her colleague that hair as nice as mine was wasted on someone with a face like mine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 024

You deserved it 3 364

The Top

Today, I found out one of the main causes of my depression is that my life is too sheltered and boring. My doctor and many of my friends have advised me to find a hobby. Except, everything I would like to do is either too expensive and/or impossible due to my disabilities and other mental disorders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 779

You deserved it 262

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend masturbating beside me. I asked if she needed a hand. She called me a pervert and now won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 928

You deserved it 8 122

Today, it was my wedding. Everyone showed up… except my fiancé. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 330

You deserved it 3 219

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I refused to share a toothbrush with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 813

You deserved it 6 282

Today, while I was taking my driver's test, my instructor received a text message. He promptly had a panic attack and screamed for me to pull over. It turned out his wife wanted a divorce. The last 15 minutes of my test consisted of him sobbing to himself as I drove back to the DMV. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 970

You deserved it 2 018

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she says "Don't cum in me, my husband has plans for later." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 258

You deserved it 1 002