Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I fell asleep on the couch and woke up to find that I had slept through my house getting robbed. FML
Today, I took a nap on my couch. I woke up three hours later to my neighbor knocking on my door, asking if I was OK because looking from the outside in, they thought I was dead. Guess I sleep like I’ve been hit by a truck. FML
Today, after a long day at work, I fell asleep in my living room. When I woke up, I saw a man leaving my bedroom wearing my pajamas, and I started screaming as he casually left. The cops came and apparently he's mentally ill. He truly believed it was his house. FML
Today, I woke up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water. Groggy and disoriented, I bumped into several pieces of furniture and made a lot of noise. My dad woke up, mistook me for a burglar, and knocked me out with his fist. FML
Today, I was really, REALLY tired at work. I went to the restroom to take a little break, and must have dozed off, because I was awoken by my boss, knocking on the door of the stall. Apparently, I had been snoring. FML
Today, I put my headphones on and laid down to relax to some music. I fell asleep, and woke up later to a police officer busting into my house. My neighbor had been knocking on my door, then looked through my window and saw me on my couch, and was convinced I'd died. FML
Today, I couldn't find my key so I sat against the wall to wait for my roommate to get home. I fell asleep. When I woke up a few hours later, I could hear her inside. She chose not to wake me up and let me in. FML
Today, I came home to a homeless man sleeping in my living room. It turns out he thought my house was abandoned due to its disheveled appearance, and decided to break in. FML
Today, I snuck into my boyfriend's house because I knew his parents wouldn't be there. Later, I woke up in a hospital bed because his sister thought I was a burglar and tased me. FML
Today, I woke up to a burglar holding a gun. He yelled at me to get up so I did. He then paused and laughed. I was sleeping naked. FML
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Top comments
colton_colton 50
Well atleast he didn't hurt you. Hope the robber gets caught OP
ChawanKiti 15
That really sucks. I wouldn't really say you deserve it, considering the robber could have been violent if they noticed you were awake, but how could you feel comfortable enough to fall back asleep?
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Comments (102)
martin998877 12
Today I broke into an empty house to rob it. Unfortunately the owner was inside, asleep on the couch! I thought they were gonna attack me, luckily I had a gun. They pretended to be asleep so I let them live. Fml.
Senseless_487 29
I'm gonna go ahead and say no to that.
meepingoreos 6
How would that be an FML? It sounds pretty good that he fell back asleep.
nightbirdblue 27
Maybe the robber wanted a reason to kill? That could be a FML at least from the robber's prospective.
mkymouse90 17
Wow how did that happen...
zZLightZz 13
at least he wasn't a rapist
Meggston 17
How could you possibly fall back asleep with a stranger in your house? Did you think it was a weird kind of dream or something? The adrenaline something like that puts in your system should have woken you up with a pretty big start.
Earths_Venus 25
As a heavy sleeper, I can honestly say, it's time to get a dog to avoid this happening again.
Trinidad727 9
For your sake thats the best case scenario!!
Meggston 17
I can't even fall back to sleep if I've had a dream there was a wasp in my room.
bravesgirl55 11
Or a spider... Creepy bastards!
Meggston 17
Spiders aren't that bad. None where I live can do any damage. I'm allergic to wasps though.
Chibi_Kitten 24
Are you kidding me #80? Spiders can be so creepy when you wake up with a small one crawling down your face that turns out to be a Black Widow.
Meggston 17
The scariest spider where I live is a garden spider. And that's only because it's big. No venomous ones, mostly daddy long legs and house spiders.
GoodOptions 12
So, you're saying there is absolutely no way that a black widow or brown recluse could be inhabiting your house, or in close proximity to your house? Have you conducted a spider census?
Meggston 17
No. It's a " This is Northern Pennsylvania the scary ass spider numbers are low."
fearlesscooldude 12
In your defense, fighting a robber would've been to tiring.
slipstreak 10
Reminds me of the time I slept through an earthquake, and it's aftershock. Best sleep of my life.
howlingwolf89 16
How!!!??? That is the biggest lie I've ever heard! I don't even know why FML publish such things!