Health, Alcohol and Weird: Early bird booze special

Early bird booze special

By Anonymous - 22/12/2022 18:00

Today, I received an invitation to a Happy Hour happening tomorrow. It's at 6 a.m. How am I supposed to drink at 6 a.m.? FML

I agree, your life sucks 671

You deserved it 203

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By ButNotBed - 04/11/2018 13:30

Today, I was told to be at a job site bright and early. I woke up and pounded several body smashing drinks to get going. They then called to tell me work was canceled due to weather. It's 6am. I can’t get back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 414

You deserved it 864

By idontevengetpaid - 05/09/2016 04:35 - Brazil - Rio De Janeiro

Today, I arrived at my internship at 7 am after three hours of sleep with a massive hangover. When I got there, my boss told me he had made a mistake and I was meant to come in next week. He then said, "Well, now that you're here, you might as well get some work done. Come in next week as well." FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 148

You deserved it 15 242

Partytime!

By revalc - 16/08/2009 04:35 - Canada

Today, I'm having my housewarming party and had prepared food, drink, and games for all the 19 confirmed guests on Facebook. I waited till 11, but nobody showed up. I checked Facebook again and realized I had accidentally put tomorrow as the party date. I have to work the whole day tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 607

You deserved it 51 872

By unhappystudent - 14/12/2016 12:32 - United States - Storrs Mansfield

Today, after a long night of studying, my roommate and her friends decided it would be fun to throw a mini party in my room at 7am. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 664

You deserved it 605

Can't handle it

By Anonymous - 20/01/2021 14:01 - Germany

Today, I feel hung over. Don’t feel up to anything except slouching on the sofa, nursing my headache. Must have been one hell of a party, lots of booze, right? Actually, all I did was go to bed at 11:30 last night, instead of my usual 8.30. FML

I agree, your life sucks 873

You deserved it 171

By Anonymous - 21/03/2011 06:20 - United Kingdom

Today, it was my friend's 18th birthday. She had invited us out drinking. I've never had alcohol before and was very excited. I got a call explaining that she had invited one too many and asked me not to come. People bragging on facebook about what a great time they were having didn't help either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 490

You deserved it 6 264

Inappropriate crush

By Anonymous - 14/06/2020 17:00

Today, a week after my 10-year anniversary, I realized I've somehow been roped into hosting my husband's crush's birthday party with all their friends. My gift to myself was a $60 bottle of whiskey that won't arrive in time to help me with my debilitating social anxiety. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 454

You deserved it 358

Nice try

By Anonymous - 23/01/2022 21:00 - Philippines

Today, I got drunk until morning at a college friend's apartment with bunch of strangers. Some officials came in due to the noise and I tried to scare them away by pretending to sing a latin song of worship I made up, thinking they'd respect the gathering if it was a religious one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 193

You deserved it 1 461

By constantine - 29/08/2010 04:47 - United States

Today, I wanted to go clubbing with my friends. I started drinking at home to save on the price of drinks, instead I fell asleep on my couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 565

You deserved it 36 146

It's just liquid fun

By Anonymous - 30/12/2010 05:08 - United Kingdom

Today, I caught my mom trying to get secretly smashed out of her brain-box on booze at 8:00 a.m. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 035

You deserved it 3 027

Chazzster 28

Thursday 22 December 2022 19:55

It’s probably a typo - Probably supposed to be 6 PM… Just call and check.

Anderling 32

Thursday 22 December 2022 18:14

It’s always 5 o’clock somewhere, I guess?

Comments

Anderling 32

Thursday 22 December 2022 18:14

It’s always 5 o’clock somewhere, I guess?

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 22 December 2022 20:06

5 o'clock a.m?

Chazzster 28

Thursday 22 December 2022 19:55

It’s probably a typo - Probably supposed to be 6 PM… Just call and check.

RichardPencil 30

Thursday 22 December 2022 20:07

Don't go to sleep. Just party all night and when 6 am rolls around, just take the party over there!

JackWood 20

Friday 23 December 2022 0:09

You drink screwdrivers, bloody Mary's, Irish coffee, and beer is not just for breakfast anymore.

angeliche 1

Friday 23 December 2022 2:21

Well first of all you have to lose that attitude. Can’t drink with that attitude.

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Social Media Love Facebook Am I overreacting? AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Students Relatable Technology Education Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward

The Top

Today, I saw some servicemen sitting outside a café, and I went over to thank them for their service. They waited till after I was done shaking their hands before they told me that they were just actors on their lunch break. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 999

You deserved it 7 513

Today, I pulled my Christmas tree out of my mother-in-law's garage, only to find out rats had ruined all the lights. The tree cost $2600. FML

I agree, your life sucks 198

You deserved it 527

The Top

Today, I found out that not only is my girlfriend enough of a superstitious twat to believe the world is going to end on December 21st, she actually thinks it's an acceptable excuse to go sleep around with other men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 125

You deserved it 3 424

Today, when confronting my boyfriend about slapping a girl's ass in the club, he claimed: "There was a mosquito on it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 842

You deserved it 1 392

Today, just to have a chance of a future career, I had to major in Data Science. Here's to 2.5 more years of soul-crushing tedium and passionless abstraction. If I had the resources to control my own life, I would have been a tradesman so I wouldn't have to sacrifice 4 years of my life on this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 581

You deserved it 331

Today, my kid threw a fit on our way home, wanting me to stop and call grandma. Why? Because she was convinced I was going to wreck the car, and grandma is a good driver who won't crash. When we got home, she stopped fussing, said, "Thank god, we're home," ran up to grandpa and said, "Mom's a scary driver." She's 3. FML

I agree, your life sucks 832

You deserved it 378

Today, I had what I thought would be an important (and formal) interview. Not only did I turn up completely overdressed, the man who was interviewing me arrived 30 minutes late. To top it all off, I was so distracted by his mysterious total lack of eyebrows that I forgot everything I had to say. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 274

You deserved it 524

Today, my mom went through my textbook and sharpied everything that could be "pornographic." It's a high-school biology textbook. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 921

You deserved it 2 071