Kids, Neighbours and Miscellaneous: Defense!

Defense!

By ruined_suit - 17/04/2009 21:12 - United States

Today, I came home from work to find that my neighbor's trash bins were still on the curb. While returning the bins to her backyard, her kid ran out and shot me with a paintball gun. Multiple times. He thought I was a burglar and ruined my new suit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 127

You deserved it 7 136

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By signupsheetfail - 12/08/2009 19:02 - Canada

Today, I was doing target practice with my new paintball pistol. One of the bullets missed, and hit my new neighbor's house. I went up to the door to apologize, not realizing I was still holding the paintball gun. My ex-soldier neighbor thought I was robbing him and put me in a chokehold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 882

You deserved it 41 911

Get off my lawn!

By Anonymous - 29/08/2020 14:09

Today, the police came to my house and arrested me. Why? The neighborhood kids thought it would be fun to hide behind my house and shoot at people with paintball guns. People saw it coming from my house and called the police. I was fired from work, due to missing it without notice. No excuses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 138

You deserved it 112

By bettercallpeta - 15/02/2013 05:42 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's delinquent kid shooting squirrels with a BB gun. Shocked and furious at his cruel behavior, I told him to stop, with the threat of telling his parents. He responded by shooting me in the nuts and running away in a fit of laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 106

You deserved it 11 157

1, 2, 3… FIRE!

By Username - 11/08/2011 04:53 - United States

Today, I walked out of my house wearing only boxers, only to be greeted by kids with paintball guns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 000

You deserved it 15 265

By Anonymous - 12/01/2014 17:28 - United States - Sharon

Today, I was walking home from a horrible day at work, when some idiot emptied a trashcan on my head from his apartment balcony. He cried "Oh shit!" and apologized because I wasn't his intended target. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 745

You deserved it 3 734

By Anonymous - 30/04/2012 21:34 - United States

Today, I shot a paintball gun at a bees' nest. The bees flew through my neighbors' windows and, for lack of a better word, slaughtered them. An ambulance was called, and I feel like a total dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 571

You deserved it 62 983

Sorry

By FailedSniper - 22/03/2011 16:31 - United States

Today, I saw my dad's friend across the street working on my neighbor's roof. To continue the airsoft war we'd been having, I shot at him with the sniper gun I'd bought. I hit him, and he fell off the roof. I ran over to see if he was OK. It wasn't my dad's friend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 152

You deserved it 54 030

By no - 17/11/2014 02:26 - United States

Today, I got in trouble for shooting my paintball gun at a piece of wood, so my dad told me to go wash it. While I was washing it, he shot me several times in the back, yelling, "That's payback for being born." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 648

You deserved it 4 007

By iusedprotectionanyway - 21/03/2014 21:44 - New Zealand - Waitakere

Today, I went to a paintball match with my family and the family of my brother's girlfriend. A few minutes into, my brother's girlfriend's dad snuck up on me, unloaded into me from behind, and snarled, "That's for knocking my daughter up." He got the wrong guy. My back is killing me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 247

You deserved it 3 516

Kinda sus

By Anonymous - 08/03/2017 09:00 - United States - Minneapolis

Today, the new security guard of my apartment building tackled me for "suspicious behavior" while I was taking a bag full of dirty kitty litter to the trash chute. He broke my arm and cause the trash bag to explode. When I got back from the hospital, I was fined for littering in the hallway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 941

You deserved it 308

roll_fukng_tide 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 1:56

damn man. that does suck. my suggestion... get a paintball gun and have some fun of your own :p jk. dont do that.

caligal14 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 2:09

While I don't really know the whole story, but I do know that my neighbors are really nice and just the type of people that would put our trashcans or whatever back in our driveway if they blew away or we left them out, and we'd do the same for them, so... fyl.

Comments

Ohnoitslindsay 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:33

#71 - Sometimes they do, yes.

Derick_Z 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:35

Too bad paintballs use water soluble paint, so they can't stain/ruin anything. Makes me believe the entire thing might be made up, but than again 90% of this site is. Still, getting shot close range sure isn't fun.

Crummie 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:44

I would have that kid on the pavement screaming. That's bullshit...

bubbleking 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:45

#74 - would anyone really create a story this dull for attention on the internet?

antimony 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:46

so then have the kids pay for a new suit and then its all good. thats not an fml unless the suit was extremely important/special to you or needed the next day...

ohhhhshizzz 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:53

#71: LOL. bwahah, I know one chick did answer before.

davidomke 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 5:58

my girlfriend's dad owns a paintball which I work at off and on how I understand, paintballs with white paint come out in water very easy. I dunno too much about them. I know they only sell balls with white paint because its easier to clean their bunkers

crayons_fml 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 6:16

ooh i hope it wasn't too expensive.

shananigans 0

Saturday 18 April 2009 6:20

I'd normally say make the neighbors pay for it, but 1- That's kind of weird that you'd go into their backyard just to put their trash bins back, I mean I can understand putting the bins on their driveway but the backyard? And 2- He wasn't just doing it to be annoying, he thought you were a burglar, and I probably would have thought so too, especially if it was at night.