Today, the guy I've been seeing decided to "test the theory" that I can't drink alcohol due to a liver condition by mixing some into my drinks. He then complained that my ceaseless vomiting made his bathroom smell bad, and only took me to hospital when I started having a seizure. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I went to get drinks for the first time with a guy I'd been talking to. He drank 4 drinks in the span of 30 minutes, and fell asleep at the table. I went to the bathroom before getting the check, and I came back to find he'd thrown up all over our table. Needless to say, I left without saying a word to him and deleted his number. FML
Today, I had awful morning sickness, and I asked my husband if he'd get me a drink while I went to the bathroom. On the way back, I witnessed him spitting in the glass. FML
Today, my girlfriend thought it would be a good idea to drink several shots of vodka after taking a pill that makes you sick when you drink. She puked all night and then blamed me for making her sick. FML
Today, I threw up due to food poisoning. Despite my fever and pain, my wife is completely convinced it was from secretly drinking, and I am now "PERMANENTLY FORBIDDEN" from drinking anything alcoholic. FML
Today, I went to a bar with a close friend. She got drunk and was feeling sick, so I carried her to my car to take her to her house. Some stranger accused me of drugging her and tackled me with her in my arms. She threw up on me, and he took off running without an apology. FML
Today, I got really sick after drinking a lot of alcohol and started throwing up. Every time I threw up into the toilet, the water would splash back up into my face. FML
Today, my friend got drunk. He always pukes when he gets drunk, but I decided to drive him home anyway. He didn't puke the whole ride. We arrived at his house and he got out. Right as I was about to drive away he stumbled back to my car because he forgot his wallet. He grabbed it and puked on me. FML
Today, I was consoling my drunk husband as he violently emptied his stomach contents into our toilet. One particular retch made me nauseous, and I vomited all down his back, causing him to turn his head and vomit all over the wall. I got to clean it all up. FML
Today, my boyfriend got so drunk that he was sick in the taxi, sick on me, then sick on himself when he was sitting on the toilet. What's more, I can't get into bed because he's been sick all over my half of the bed. So I'm sleeping on the sofa tonight. FML
Today, my loser roommate got wasted. He comes to me before going to bed, tells me he loves me, tries to hug me, then explosively vomits all over my face, my hair, my clothes. Then spends the rest of the night retching. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Bogrbon 27
“Today the guy that I‘be been seeing got arrested by the cops for assault and battery by attempting to poison me with alcohol me despite my repeated warnings that I would end up in the hospital due to a liver condition.”
samomaha 17
I agree with Bogrbon. You need to tell the police this story.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (16)
xxlk4xx 6
I agree with everyone else, tell the police! if someone says they cant eat or drink something weather it be because of allergies or in your case liver issues then people should respect that.
coius 23
Hope dude gets raped in jail twice. He needs a lesson taught about not testing waters. My wife can’t have alcohol as she has a form of asian alcohol intolerance syndrome and the second i see anything in her hand (even cooking alcohol which i’ve gotten rid of before an incident happened) i summersault over furniture to rip it away. I only drink beer. So easy to know what she can and cant have, but i dont want her to suffer vommiting half the night from it. To do it on purpose is deplorable. Like putting peanuts in a meal for someone who has peanut allergies to see if they are lying. Wtf?
Taurus_ChicKa 37
By your username, it sounds like you dumped his ass. And that is very good news. So sorry you had to go through that. Honestly, you should probably tell the cops because that could be considered attempted murder. It's battery if nothing else.
randybryant799 21
Couldn't you taste it?? I can always taste booze.