Intimacy: Cover me - FML

Cover me

By Mrmz07 - 01/05/2016 09:32 - United States - Midland

Spicy

Today, I was called in to work on my day off to cover for a co-worker because she was busy getting it on with my brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 621

You deserved it 1 577

Labour Day: Rest or Disaster?
Find out how a day off can turn into a series of hilarious, unexpected events. More…

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Same thing different taste

That's that, then

By Anonymous - 12/09/2020 08:02

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my brother having sex. With my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 557

You deserved it 200

By Anonymous - 20/09/2013 21:00 - Hungary - Szeged

Today, my girlfriend came over to visit me and my brother at our apartment. I left for just five minutes to fix us lunch. When I got back, she was making out with my brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 808

You deserved it 3 981

By hell - 14/11/2015 21:08 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I got called into work on my day off. I ended up being written up for being 15 minutes late to a shift I didn't even have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 888

You deserved it 1 784

By anonymous - 26/06/2016 20:18 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was sick, so I went into work to see if I could get my shift covered, instead of just calling in. I ended up working an extra hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 601

You deserved it 3 365

By tmi4me - 26/05/2015 03:50 - United States

Today, my boss admitted she's having an affair. She's married to my brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 337

You deserved it 2 070

Emergency

By Ethan Sitzes - 25/06/2022 22:00

Today, I called into work because of a family emergency. My boss was understanding; my coworker? He tore me a new one because his wife wanted him to take the day off, which he didn't because it was going to be a tough day at work. He also threatened to find a way he could get me fired. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 076

You deserved it 94

By Anonymous - 31/07/2009 03:44 - United States

Today, I covered for my friend at work because he said he was having car troubles and was going to be late. Two hours into the shift, I got a call from my roommate asking why my girlfriend had moved out. Turns out, I'd covered my friend's shift so he could help my girlfriend move out behind my back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 129

You deserved it 3 273

By Girl With a Cold - 08/02/2012 18:46

Today, I was sick, so I emailed my co-workers with a list of my hours, asking if anyone would be willing to cover them for me. I only got one hour covered, and that was during a day I don't even work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 800

You deserved it 2 682

By SleepIsForTheWeak - 19/03/2015 16:41 - Canada - St. John's

Today, I had to work a double shift after my relief called in "sick" just so he could go to a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 881

You deserved it 2 563

Never the twain shall meet

By Anonymous - 15/07/2023 11:00 - Portugal - Lisbon

Today, at the office, my boss lectured me for being two minutes late for work, even though yesterday I worked on my lunch break because she needed my help. important to mention: my boss is my sister. FML

I agree, your life sucks 807

You deserved it 122

Next

Top comments

604 11

Monday 2 May 2016 9:41

Sounds like you both got dicked around.

ssnow_fml 20

Monday 2 May 2016 10:08

To me, that's not a good enough reason to call in. If they gave a different one then I would totally throw them under the bus about it.

Comments

ThrottleJockey 35

Monday 2 May 2016 16:02

Sounds like you both got the shaft.

KaylaTackett 18

Monday 2 May 2016 17:04

This is why I don't answer the phone when work calls me on my day off.

littlefoott69 14

Monday 2 May 2016 22:01

your brother gets laid and you get paid..sounds like a deal to me

jelrid 30

Tuesday 3 May 2016 3:23

Sounds like your brother ****** HER life.

Grandiablo 2

Friday 13 May 2016 23:32

I agree with Kayla...you have no obligation to answer work stuff on a day off...and if they nag about it just rell them that your co-worker-miss-bitch is not ill at all...best if you get proof to show

TheyCallMeDamien 17

Saturday 25 June 2016 20:50

Your brother thanks you.

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The Top

Today, a guy for whom I did a design job told me he would only be able to pay me in 3 weeks. I told him that it was OK, as long as I didn't have to follow him around to collect my money. "Don't worry, I know the feeling," he said, "I used to run an illegal business." FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 513

You deserved it 2 171

Today, my dad told me I'm no longer allowed to see my boyfriend. Apparently there is a deer camera above my driveway that snaps pictures whenever it senses movement. Too bad I didn't know that when I was giving my boyfriend head in the driveway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 382

You deserved it 60 099

The Top

Today, I was babysitting a little girl. We were colouring, and she told me she wanted to draw a picture of me. After she was done, she showed me the picture. I'm drawn as a fat cow. The worst part is, the picture actually looks kinda like me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 745

You deserved it 10 427

Today, my boyfriend gave me an amazing orgasm after a long dry spell. I moaned his name as I climaxed, and he replied, "What?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 838

You deserved it 301

Today, I had a big party that left my house really messy. I spent hours cleaning the house until it was spotless. When my parents got home, my dad said, "Did you have fun at the party?" I said, "How'd you know?" and he replied, "You hate cleaning and the house was filthy when we left." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 645

You deserved it 53 928

Today, our computer system has irretrievably broken down due to viruses. My boss is the one who refused to get new antivirus software, but he’s still blaming me because I’m the computer guy and should be able to protect us from stupidly complicated viruses, "like the hackers in the movies." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 657

You deserved it 233

Today, I came home to find that my dog had figured out how to open the fridge again. He'd helped himself to raw eggs and crab. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 814

You deserved it 1 677

Today, I work at a pizza place and one of my jobs is to spoon crushed red pepper into bags. After I finished this, without thinking to wash my hands first, I used the bathroom. It still burns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 805

You deserved it 35 428