Sex and Intimacy: Considerate - FML

Considerate

By BadLuckLad - 22/10/2014 22:38 - United Kingdom - Portsmouth

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend cheating on me. The guy turned around and said, "Sorry, I borrowed your condoms." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 365

You deserved it 3 856

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Same thing different taste

By hopeless - 08/07/2009 01:12 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me and refused to give me back the condoms I'd just bought. Why? Because she wants to use them with the guys she's been cheating on me with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 367

You deserved it 4 287

By SimpleSimon - 01/07/2009 00:14 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I went to work leaving my girlfriend asleep in my bed. Later she calls me demanding to know how long I've been cheating on her. We don't use condoms but she found several in the bin when she decided to empty it. I had to explain while my colleagues listened that I use them to masturbate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 289

You deserved it 19 712

Sorry

By Anonymous - 23/09/2013 18:06 - United States - Olympia

Spicy

Today, I walked in on my girlfriend having sex with another man. Her main reaction was to get mad at me for not knocking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 848

You deserved it 5 074

By pittmanw - 18/07/2016 02:54 - United States - Jackson

Spicy

Today, I came home to find my girlfriend in bed with another guy. On top of it all he stole my favorite underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 423

You deserved it 1 076

By fuck russia and fuck georgia too - 09/03/2014 18:38 - Azerbaijan

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She'd walked in on me jerking off, which she said is exactly the same as cheating on her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 985

You deserved it 10 354

Nice try

By johnnycomehelpme - 14/11/2014 00:59 - United States - Skokie

Spicy

Today, I found out that my girlfriend was cheating on me. Her excuse? I was the one that had initially introduced them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 064

You deserved it 3 799

By knicksfan - 05/04/2009 05:04 - United States

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. She gave me back the brand new box of 12 condoms that I had bought and left at her house. There were 8 left and I wasn't the one who opened them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 97 984

You deserved it 6 598

By Oops - 24/10/2009 13:14 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, a friend asked me if I'd buy him some condoms because he's too shy to buy them himself. I obliged and whilst queuing at the till to buy them I felt someone tap my shoulder. I turned around to see my fiancée glaring at me. We don't use condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 938

You deserved it 6 813

By oink401 - 05/11/2011 15:40 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend came to my house crying because the guy who she has been cheating on me with doesn't want to be with her anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 930

You deserved it 4 369

Rushed

By Anonymous - 31/05/2012 20:53 - Canada - Courtenay

Spicy

Today, in a rush to get my clothes back on at my girlfriend's house at the sound of her parents opening the front door, I forgot to take the condom off. Her dad watched it fall out of my pant leg and onto the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 660

You deserved it 44 684

Next

Top comments

GigaPudding_fml 24

Thursday 23 October 2014 14:22

"...and your girlfriend" Sorry to hear that OP, cheaters are the worst!

XlDeathshadowXl 13

Thursday 23 October 2014 14:23

You should of told them that you poked holes in all of them, and that she will be stuck with him now forever. Sorry man, that sucks.

Comments

Stuffaluffagus 25

Thursday 23 October 2014 16:45

Sorry your girlfriend was a ****. At least now you know though

GirasolNegro 22

Thursday 23 October 2014 16:54

I hope she's your ex-girlfriend after this!!

JOEBOBARNOLD 15

Thursday 23 October 2014 16:57

Am I the only one who thought canadian?

ARetardedSeal 24

Thursday 23 October 2014 17:08

Level 10 Canadian: "It's cool bro, as long as everyone is safe" @ author But for real tho, that is really unfortunate to hear, you'll find the right person soon enough. Someone worthy of marriage.

Gemini907 18

Thursday 23 October 2014 17:33

"Borrowed"

Geeve95 11

Thursday 23 October 2014 18:03

These hoes ain't loyal

MissBehavin77 18

Thursday 23 October 2014 18:48

Hope you at least punched the dude and kicked the **** out.

vikky538 28

Thursday 23 October 2014 19:25

ask him to take all things he used...condoms and your ex gf...

mister_icicle 17

Thursday 23 October 2014 19:41

For ****'s sake, Dave!

ZannityZan 13

Friday 24 October 2014 7:38

That would be Dave taking his pranks to a whole other level...

ShitHappen_fml 15

Thursday 23 October 2014 19:43

is he sorry for borrowing your girlfriend ?!

Scarylizard1798 23

Thursday 23 October 2014 20:00

**** her bro...oh wait...someone else alreAdy DID! XD nah man she's a **** dump her

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The Top

Today, I told my husband to stop his friendship with our neighbor’s 17 year-old daughter. They claim they just play video games together, but lately he’s been uninterested in sex and barely shows me any affection. He vehemently said, “It’s not like we’re fucking or anything! Chill!” and stormed out of the house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 684

You deserved it 131

Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say, "Fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was "Pollo frito". I then had sex, constantly saying "Pollo frito" for an hour. I later realized I was saying "Fried chicken." FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 488

You deserved it 183 654

The Top

Today, was my sixteenth birthday. I was hoping to get a car. Instead, my parents got me a 3 month membership at the gym so I can lose weight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 495

You deserved it 55 818

Today, I slept in late and when I woke up, thought I was the only one in the house so I decided to walk around the corner to the only upstairs bathroom naked. My dad also slept in, also thought he was the only one in the house, and also decided to walk to the bathroom naked. We collided. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 332

You deserved it 14 920

Today, my hourly wage as a doctor is exactly 80 cents more than the hourly wage of my friend's, who did an apprenticeship with no extra diploma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 734

You deserved it 253

Today, after training for six months in martial arts, I was ready to stand up against my bully. When he approached me. I found out the hard way he’s been doing martial arts since he was six. I didn’t know that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 244

You deserved it 414

Today, after many years of being single, I finally worked up the courage to ask my coworker out. He said no and gave me "fair warning" that he's going to report me for sexual harassment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 615

You deserved it 2 852

Today, I've been caffeine-free for 2 weeks. It's turned me into a constipated angry bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 054

You deserved it 725