Today, I went to drive my mom's car for a change. It wouldn't start, so I open the hood. Someone had stolen the battery. I go to start my own car so I can drive to the police station to report the theft, and discover someone siphoned off my gas. FML
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Autumn: Leaves and Laughter
When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves!
Today, I went out to start my car to go to work. When it wouldn't start, I popped the hood to see what was wrong. Some kind individual took advantage of the fact that my window doesn't roll up, and stole my battery. FML
Today, I went out to my car to run some errands. It wouldn't start. I called AAA, only to find out my battery wasn't dead, it was stolen. FML
Today, I woke up to the sound of my car being stolen. FML
Today, my dad agreed to let me borrow the car to go rock climbing with my friends. He'd just filled it up with gas, which is how I realized halfway back home that one of my "friends" had siphoned well over half the gas straight out of the tank. FML
Today, I picked up my car from the repair shop, drove two miles, and ran out of gas. I then walked to get gas, put a gallon of gas in the car, and tried to start it. The battery was too weak to start the car, and died on the spot. FML
Today, my car was stolen. From my driveway. By the guy who sold it to me. FML
Today, my car was stolen from my driveway. I reported it to the police, the insurance company, and my neighbors, and begged for help via social media. As I walked to catch a bus, I saw my car parked outside my school. I forgot I left it there last night. FML
Today, I pulled into a parking lot, for the car to simply shut off because I ran out of gas. Then I couldn't get the key out of the ignition, so I called my dad, who walked all the way to where I was, only to find out that the car was still in drive. FML
Today, I got into my car and it wouldn't start. I noticed I had left the lights on and assumed the battery was dead. Then, I couldn't get my key out of the ignition. So, I called AAA only to have the guy put my car in park and start the engine. FML
Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML
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Top comments
Phusion 0
who the **** drives to the police station to report a theft? have you heard of a telephone?!?
swartm34 0
**** your neighborhood
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Comments (58)
Punkartmama 0
This has nothing to do with living in a bad neighborhood. Turn on the news, it's happening all over. This is what happens when the economy sucks, people steal anything not locked down.
TC1_fml 0
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=owned
Phusion 0
who the **** drives to the police station to report a theft? have you heard of a telephone?!?
voodootrucker 0
when i was a kid i went to court to pay my first ticket being under 18 i had to bring a parent went to go home somebody stole battery in front of courthouse still had to pay fine plus battery cost and new cables because the cut them
deegirl 0
Uhm, things called a phone. Or you could have switched your battery over to her car to get it started. YDI.
natpewpew 0
You know you can't apply a report by phone, right? Either way, FYL OP. :/
LaUruguaya 11
oops wrong fml
muichini 0
there's this magical thing they invented called a phone. you call 911 or your police stations number which can be found on the front page of the phone book (this thing has its own book that comes out every year) and you call them and let them know that way. also better idea if you have some know how, take your battery out and put it in your mom's car. hopefully there is still gas in that car
ozymandias_fml 0
YDI for leaving the first car unlocked, and YDIx2 for not *calling* the police. That's what they have phones for -- to come to the scene of the crime and take your reports.
DoomJeff91 2
Check your kidneys real quick.