Food and Miscellaneous: Chunks

Chunks

By Anonymous - 08/05/2009 20:02 - United States

Today, I learned that no matter how much you assume that the crunchy bits in a bag of crisps are in fact crisps, you will occasionally find that your assumptions are wrong. Beetles just don't have the same appeal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 521

You deserved it 5 877

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/08/2009 19:39 - Canada

Today, I found out that the crumbs on the couch that look like the Oreos you just ate, can actually turn out to be very crunchy, and have legs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 015

You deserved it 46 199

Thanks for the heads up

By thanksbro - 20/09/2010 19:26 - United States

Today, I grabbed a handful of crackers from the kitchen, only to find it crawling with bugs. Apparently, my brother had made the same discovery earlier, but put the box of crackers back in the cupboard anyway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 936

You deserved it 3 037

By ticked - 06/10/2009 13:01 - Pakistan

Today, I was eating a packet of chips while watching TV. I saw a crumb on the table in front of me, so without thinking I picked it up and ate it. It wasn't a crumb. It was a tick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 557

You deserved it 47 992

By ReluctantAntEater - 21/08/2014 21:48 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I tasted a perfectly salted, crispy, and dead carpenter ant hidden in my bag of pistachios. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 045

You deserved it 3 574

By Anonymous - 16/04/2009 01:22 - United States

Today, I decided to snack on some MandM's. I saw my dog sniffing something and realized one of my MandM's had fallen on the floor. To prevent my dog from eating the chocolate, I hurriedly snatched the MandM off the ground and ate it. When I bit down, I realized it wasn't an MandM. It was a dead beetle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 900

You deserved it 60 087

Added spice

By hungry - 06/04/2009 03:19 - United States

Today, I was hungry and decided to nibble on some Cheez-Its I had in my room. After I'd enjoyed some of them, I looked into the box to see how many I had left, where I noticed a lot of little black moving dots. Apparently I wasn't the only one enjoying the crackers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 565

You deserved it 16 942

By rivercitybarf - 08/08/2009 08:48 - United States

Today, I found out that worms in apples aren't something that you just see in cartoons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 708

You deserved it 6 900

Random Access Memories

By Anonymous - 18/10/2021 17:00

Today, I learned the horrifying implications of my memory not being what it used to be when I bought a tasty-looking chocolate bar, only to realize upon taking a bite that I'd bought one before and not liked it one bit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 658

You deserved it 292

Thanks

By badeats - 22/06/2009 05:43 - United States

Today, I visited my grandma. She offered me some chips in a Ziploc bag. I thought they were sour cream and onion chips from the look of them. They tasted funny, but I didn't want to be rude and I kept eating. I looked closer after a while and noticed that what I thought were chives was actually mold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 603

You deserved it 9 305

Stuck in a rut

By amandanoelle - 09/10/2016 06:42 - United States - Hot Springs National Park

Today, I realized how stagnant my life has become when, while eating some leftover salad with crackers I'd left out the night before, I decided to open some new crackers and put them with the stale, and giggled to myself about the excitement of "cracker roulette." FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 645

You deserved it 1 776

Komatose 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:32

I know wut u mean. I hate it when crisps get in my bag of beetles

Captain0bv10us 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 3:57

maybe you should go out more...

Comments

deliverypenguin 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:24

awwww dude that sucks.

bridgette5866 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 2:44

Hahahahahahahaha best wording of an FMK ever.

YouCantBreakMe 9

Saturday 28 August 2010 10:19

FML, not FMK

424136 0

Thursday 24 February 2011 3:33

the k is right next to the l on a keyboard

aliciamartinez15 11

Thursday 25 October 2012 3:14

To assume makes and ass out of u and me.

strangersdk 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:28

ahahaha! finally! i moderated this one, and the snails one above. never seen one that i moderated before.

Captain0bv10us 0

Sunday 24 July 2011 3:57

maybe you should go out more...

nabee26 15

Friday 29 June 2012 19:01

What does that mean exactly??

lnm701 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:30

Aughhhh how do you not notice that?!

Tehalon 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:31

Repost?

mattmag 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:32

Haha that's awful. Look before you bite! Also ,to fellow Americans: crisps = potato chips

abasio 1

Friday 23 September 2011 2:21

Never seen an American use the word crisps before. Is it a louisiana thing?

Link5794 18

Friday 26 October 2012 3:32

Pringles cans say "potato crisps", but that's pretty much the only time I've seen it on a package in America.

Komatose 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:32

I know wut u mean. I hate it when crisps get in my bag of beetles

carbonmurderer 0

Tuesday 16 February 2010 7:49

lol ur terrible

ageofkyle 0

Thursday 9 September 2010 17:04

haha lol

The_Bleeder 13

Thursday 17 December 2015 20:54

Please, learn to spell before you make a comment.

mcsnelly 5

Friday 8 May 2009 23:35

Now THAT is a bad day....lol P.S. I love how this one is worded haha

kellybri 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:35

That's disturbing. I hope I've never eaten a beetle in my chips! :P

Ole_Stinker 0

Friday 8 May 2009 23:40

I may be the only person who cares, but I have to say that this was one of the best written FML's I have ever read. Well done.

24788 6

Friday 8 May 2009 23:44

I'm sure it wasn't that bad. I mean people eat bugs all around the world. They're healthier than the normal crisp.

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The Top

Today, we were running late because my hair got tangled in the curtains. My mother-in-law got so angry, she hacked at it, leaving me with a bald patch, then went and sat in the car as though we were still going anywhere with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 094

You deserved it 200

Today, I took my 8 year-old daughter to an airplane museum to show her the kinds of aircraft I’ve worked on during my 30+ year career. In the first 15 minutes, I had grease on my new shirt, bumped my head, spilled coffee and cut my hand. Sums up my career. Only 10 more years to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 471

You deserved it 237

The Top

Today, I called in sick at work because I have the flu. This is my first sick day in the 2 years I've worked there. It's also the day the CEO made a surprise visit. My co-workers all got generous salary increases, and some of them promotions. I'm not included, simply because I wasn't there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 546

You deserved it 3 860

Today, I went out for lunch with one of my co-workers. After work, I talked to one of my friends about how unpleasant the lunch was with him. My co-worker was standing behind me listening in the whole time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 554

You deserved it 2 792

Today, I had artfully managed to avoid anyone knowing that I was moving into a trailer park. I showed up at the trailer where all my friends, co-workers, and exes were waiting. My parents knew I was feeling down and wanted to throw me a surprise 'moving in' party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 481

You deserved it 4 711

Today, I decided it was time to lose my virginity to my boyfriend. After about ten minutes he started going faster and his stomach was slapping against mine. It was making a weird sound so I started laughing. Apparently that wasn't sexy and he went soft. My first time and we didn't even finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 323

You deserved it 38 286

Today, thanks to my habit of peeing in the shower, I accidentally peed in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 258

You deserved it 1 301

Today, a girl told me she stopped eating cherries ever since her father choked on one when she was a kid. She later mentioned that she doesn't like to drive. I sarcastically asked, "Did your dad choke on a car too?" Nope, her two brothers died in a car accident. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 603

You deserved it 58 886

Chunks

Same thing different taste

Thanks for the heads up

Added spice

Random Access Memories

Thanks

Stuck in a rut

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